Fozzie, Fozzie, #9

[Misskermie]

So, this is inspired by that Fraggle Rock episode, "We Love You Wembley." But it's told with a Muppet Show twist! Enjoy!



　
Fozzie, Fozzie, #9
Chapter One- Love perfume #9
　
　
It was any ordinary day at the Muppet theatre. Well, except for the fact that Jaz has been piled with work since Scooter was sent on vacation. She's been running back and forth, up and down, side to side, trying to deliver props, costumes, and scripts. (Oh my!) She hardly had any time for Fozzie by the end of the day.
"Kermit, I got all the scripts delivered, where's the set designs?" Jaz asked.
"Um, hold on, I think they're on my desk. But gimmie a second, I have to give Piggy her paycheck." Kermit said.
Jaz took an envolpe off Kermit's desk.
"I'll give it to her."
"Uh, that's not her paycheck, that her court summons."
"What'd she do now?"
"You don't wanna know..." Jaz exchanged envelopes, and went upstairs to deliver the paycheck. After delivering it, she ran into Fozzie on the way downstairs.
"Oh, um, Hi Jaz! Um, you wanna have dinner tonight?" Fozzie asked. "Nah, I have to see if Kermit has anymore work for me." With that, Jaz ran downstairs. Fozzie sighed. Would Jaz ever pay attention to him again?
Later, when it was time for everyone to go to bed, Jaz went into Fozzie's room.(Although, it's unconfirmed if it was out of sleepiness, or on purpose.) Fozzie looked up from the joke book he was reading and smiled. "Hi Jaz!"
Jaz waved pitifully and collapsed on the bed next to Fozzie. Fozzie pulled her closer as Jaz's eyelids began to get weaker.
Fozzie frowned, because he didn't even get to talk to her before she went to sleep. It was only 8:30. Perhaps if Jaz didn't overwork herself so much, she'd actually have time to just share one measly kiss with Fozzie. It made Fozzie blush just thinking about it. But Jaz was too generous in her work. How could he get her to relax?
...
At that moment, Fozzie got and idea...
The next day, Fozzie went down to Muppet Labs.
"Um, Bunsen can you do me a favor?" Fozzie asked.
Bunsen sat up straight and smiled.
"Of course! How can Muppet Labs be of assistance?"
Fozzie began to wring out his hat.
"Well, as you know, Jaz has been replacing Scooter while he's on vacation..."
"Yes?"
"And she's been a little too busy lately."
"Mm-Hm?"
"Well, is there a way that you can make Jaz... Pay a little more attention to me?" Fozzie blushed.
"Oh! What an opprotunity to test The latest invention from Muppet Labs! Love potion #9!"
"You've made nine love potions?"
"No, it contains nine chemicals!" Bunsen walked to the back of the lab, and fetched the love potion.
"Dr. Honeydew, why did you seal the love potion?" Fozzie asked. "Because whoever smells it, will fall in love with you. If you come back later, we'll have the love potion set so anyone who smells it, will fall in love with you, and nobody else."
"How long will that take?"
"Well, we also have to make Miss Piggy's perfume, so it will take a little while." Bunsen explained.
"Ok. Thanks Bunsen. See you later." Fozzie left Muppet Labs, as Beaker entered the room.
"Beaker, do me a favor, and put Fozzie's genetics in the bottle." Bunsen smiled.
"Mee Mee Mo Meep!"
Later, at the begining of the show, Jaz was at Kermit's desk rearranging it, while Fozzie was picking up love potion #9. As Fozzie made his way back upstairs and then he went straight to Jaz. "Hey Jaz." He smiled innocently.
"Hi." Scrambled Jaz, as she made a mess of things on Kermit's desk. "Um, check out this new air freshener I got!" Fozzie uncorked the bottle, hoping the scent would reach Jaz soon. Jaz sniffed the air. Nothing.
"Hm, that's a nice smell." Jaz smiled.
"Um... Yeah... I thought you'd like it." Fozzie said, a little dissapointed and confused. Out of nowhere, Kermit ran into the scene. "C'mon Jaz, we need to do our act together." Kermit ran onstage,as Jaz followed. Fozzie was still confused. As he was about to head back down to the lab, Miss Piggy came out of her dressing room, acting a bit strange. "Why, hello Fozzie!" Piggy smiled.
"Oh, hi Miss Piggy." Fozzie responded casually.
Piggy walked downstairs, and right up to Fozzie. It made Fozzie feel a bit uneasy.
"Um, yes Miss Piggy?"
"Oh, it's nothing Mon Capitaine..."
"M-Mon Capitaine?"
"Mm-Hmmm..."
Miss Piggy stroked his chest as Fozzie's eyes got wider and wider per stroke. "Um, excuse me for a second please."
Fozzie backed up a few steps, watching as Piggy eyed him flirtatiously. All of a sudden, Fozzie ran downstairs shouting,
"Bunseeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeen!!!!"

 

[Yuna Leonhart]

*puts an arm around Fozzie's shoulder*
My dear Fozzie, if there's one thing you should know about love potions is... they never work the way you want. Especially not if Bunsen made it

 

[Misskermie]

Chapter Two- Fozzie's Piggy Prediciment
　
　
　
　
Once Fozzie made it down to Muppet Labs, he sealed the door with some of Bunsen's scrap metal.
"Uh, Mr. Fozzie, what seems to be the matter?" Bunsen asked. "Y-You made a mistake! Th-The love potion was in Piggy's perfume bottle, and the perfume was in my bottle!" Fozzie exclaimed. "Oh my... She didn't use it did she?" Bunsen asked. "She didn't use- OF COURSE SHE USED IT!" Fozzie yelled. "I need you to fix it!"
Bunsen thought for a moment.
"Well, the potion was not meant to be temporary, but I suppose you can wait for it to wear off..." Bunsen said.
"O-Ok... But if I come back, covered in kisses, it's on your conscience..." Fozzie unblocked the door, and headed back upstairs.
When Fozzie made it upstairs, Piggy was waiting for him.
"Where have vous been Mon Cherri? I missed vous!" Piggy giggled. Fozzie, completely horrified, and shocked, only blinked a few times.
"Well, did you miss Moi?" Piggy asked, batting her eyes.
"Um... Not really." Fozzie sighed.
Piggy began to tear up. "You didn't?"
"Um, no."
"WELL FINE! BE THAT WAY! Hmph!" Piggy started to tap her foot, with her back toward him.
"If it makes you feel better, when I was down there, I, uh... Talked about you." Fozzie said.
Piggy turned around. "Really?" Piggy beamed.
"Um, yeah."
Piggy hugged him. "Oh, Fozzie, you do love Moi..."
Fozzie, completely horrified at her response, just stays silent.
"How about we have dinner tonight?" Piggy asked.
"Um... No thank you." Fozzie declined.
"Great! See vous at seven!" Piggy giggled and walked upstairs to her dressing room.
"Oh boy..." Fozzie sighed.
At that moment, Jaz came by with the set designs.
"Hey Fozzie, have you seen Kermit?" Jaz asked.
"Um, I think he's down in the canteen." Fozzie chuckled nervously. "Ok. Thanks Fozzie." Jaz kissed him on the cheek, and headed down to the canteen.
Finally, affection Fozzie wants!
Later, Kermit was at his desk. This was Fozzie's chance to ask how to get rid of the pig.
"Um, hey Kermit?"
"Yes Fozzie?"
"Um, how do you get rid of Miss Piggy?" Fozzie asked.
"Take her to the zoo, and then go to the aligator exibit." Kermit chuckled. Fozzie shook his head.
"No, I mean, what turns her off?" Fozzied asked.
"Turns her off? Uh... Really hairy guys."
Well, I'm ALL hair...
Fozzie thought.
"Why do you ask?" Kermit asked.
"Oh! Um... I have this friend, who has a hunch that Miss Piggy has a huge crush on him." Fozzie lied.
"Well tell him not to worry. Unless he's me, Piggy doesn't like him, like him." Kermit smiled.
"Um... Riiiiiiiight... Uh, Thank you Kermit." Fozzie scurried up to Miss Piggy's dressing room to try out plan B.
"Who is it?" Piggy called from inside.
"Uh, it's Fozzie." Fozzie gulped.
Piggy opened the door. "Come in dear!"
Fozzie walked inside, seeing how Miss Piggy has already replaced all photos of Kermit with his own image.
"What can I do por vous Mon Cherri?" Piggy asked, while applying lipstick. Fozzie gulped. "Uh... Well..."
"Yes?"
"I was thinking... You like me-"
"Love you. I love you."
"R-Right." Fozzie gulped. "Uh, I was thinking that maybe you should like someone better... Like... Kermit! What about Kermit? H-He's a nice guy! Right?" Fozzie chuckled.
"Kermit? Why would I like someone like him? I mean sure, he's kind, and completely humanitarian, but who needs that when you can have kind, humanitarian, handsome and funny?" Piggy giggled.
"Uh... Well... Kermit's funny!"
"Oh, Mon Cherri, don't talk me out of it..."
Piggy yanked him closer by his tie.
"We're meant for eachother." Piggy kissed his nose.
It caused Fozzie to be so alarmed, that he untied his tie, so he could run away from her. Fozzie ran out of Piggy's dressing room, and ran right into Jaz, knocking her down.
"Oh, sorry Jaz!" Fozzie helped her up.
"Hey, what happened to your tie?" Jaz asked.
"I... Um... I lost it." Fozzie lied.
"Oh. Anyway, I've been looking for you!"
"Y-You have?"
"Yeah! I'm free for the rest of the night, so I was wondering if you wanted to have dinner tonight." Jaz smiled.
"Uh... Well I would... But... I'm already having dinner with Miss Piggy..." Fozzie chuckled. "I-In fact, I have to get dressed for that, so if, um, if you'll excuse me..." Fozzie ran into his dressing room, and slammed the door behind him.
"Miss Piggy...?" Jaz muttered as she entered her own dressing room. As she made it inside, she sat on her couch.
"Dinner with... Miss Piggy...?" Jaz muttered.
　
　
Well someone's jealous!!! xD

 

[Yuna Leonhart]

Funny chapter, I'm excited to see how Fozzie's gonna get out of this mess. But I have to admit that I really didn't like it how most of this chapter was just dialog. Maybe more descriptions of what's going on and what the characters feel?
Still, I love the whole mess with the love potion

 

[Twisted Tails]

I saw the episode of Fraggle Rock "We Love Wembley" and it was very cute and funnny. Wembley get s advice from the trash heap to use the love potion to the girl fraggle named Lou. However, his fraggle friends feel in love wth him from the love potion instead. Hahahaha! Please post more! This story is funnnyyyy!

 

[Misskermie]

Ok, I promise this chapter RULES!
And it's violent at the end... heh heh heh...
It's not so bad, don't worry.
Read it before putting me in a straight jacket. xD



　
Chapter Three- Aye Vey...
　
　
　
It was almost time for dinner. And everybody's favorite bear was less than excited. He was beginning to wonder why he even dressed up to go to dinner with someone he doesn't want to be alone with. He flopped on his bed, waiting for the time he has to "pick up" Miss Piggy.

Miss Piggy stared at the clock, hoping that seven would come quickly. She picked out the perfect dress, the perfect shade of make up, and her shiniest ring.
(Which she now calls "BF".) It was like she preparing for her highschool prom. All in all, she was pretty excited.

Jaz was still in the same position, sitting on the couch, pondering over the same thing.
Dinner with Miss Piggy.
Why Piggy instead of me?
Jaz wondered.
Just then, Kermit happened to walk past her room.
"Hey Jaz, what's the matter?" He asked.
Jaz saw his face, and frowned. She looked away to avoid looking too sour. "I don't think you'll like it."
"What?" Kermit asked, hoping someone wasn't dead... Other than Dead Tom of course...
"Fozzie's going to go have dinner with Miss Piggy tonight.
Kermit chuckled. "Fozzie's having dinner with Miss Piggy? Well that's not really a big d-... Wait what?"
Jaz smiled a little. She always found it funny when Kermit had his "Hubba hubba wha-?" face on.
Kermit was hysterical. Really. He wasn't crying. Or laughing. He was just like... Wow. Shock. Seriously.
"I-It's probably for tabloids or something... right?" Kermit asked. Jaz shook her head.
"C'mon, you saw the end of The Muppets. 'Miss Piggy promises to stay out of the limelight.' She kept a promise, and if it was to you, she's definitely keeping it." Jaz nodded.
Kermit looked like he was going to cry. His girl, in the arms of his best friend. Terrible stuff.
Jaz felt the same way until she had an idea.
"Hey Kermit... What do you say we make 'em jealous?"
Kermit thought for a moment. Piggy was easily jealous. Just saying hi to another woman, would send her into a boiling rage. As for Fozzie, he's super sensitive, and is usually the first one to get his feelings hurt... But he doesn't get jealous.
Does he?
Kermit finally nodded. "Ok. What's the plan?"
"Ok, so I have a singing gig at the restaurant they're going to. Rowlf's going too, so he can play the piano, and Annie Sue and Spamela are my backups. Each of us are allowed to bring one guest to get in for free. Since Fozzie said no, I'm bringing you, and if we let the others in on this, they'll let us bring people Piggy gets super jealous of when you talk to them. Like Miss Mousey or Jessica Simpson. When we get there, me, the girls, and Rowlf will preform, while you dance with someone to make Piggy jealous. Then when I'm done singing, I'll come offstage to dance with you, so we can make Fozzie jealous!"
Kermit stared at her, amazed at how everything was well thought out. "You've been planning this all day haven't you?"
Jaz blushed. "Nooooooooooooooo..."
Kermit shook his head.
"Er, Are you in this plan or not?!" Jaz asked, a little irritated.
Kermit nodded.

At the restaurant, Kermit was on the dance floor with Miss Mousey. The other two were not there, so... Air pretty much took they're place. Jaz, Annie Sue, Spamela, and Rowlf took their places onstage. "Ready when you are Rowlf!" Jaz smiled. Rowlf nodded. He began to play the piano, and Jaz waited for her cue.

I let it fall. My heart. And as it fell, you rose to claim it.
It was dark. And I was over. Until you kissed my lips, and saved me. My hands, they were strong. But my knees were far too weak, to stand in your arms, without fallin' to your feet.

Fozzie looked up at who was singing, and was kinda scared. I'm dead. I'm dead, I'm dead, I'm dead, I died, I'm dead. Fozzie thought. "Come on Mon Cherri let's dance!" Piggy grabbed Fozzie and started to dance.

But there's a side to you, that I never knew, never knew.
All they things you'd say, they were never true, never true
And the games you played, you would always, win always win...
But I set fire, to the rain, watched it burn, as I touched your face. Well it burned and I cried 'cause I heard it screamin' out your name. Your name...

While laying, with you, I could stay there, close my eyes. You and me, forever, You and me together nothing gets better.

When Kermit and Miss Mousey started to dance, they immediately started to dance closer to Piggy and Fozzie. All Kermit got was a small, friendly wave from Miss Piggy. As for Fozzie, he tried to hide his face.

'Cause there's a side to you that I never knew, never knew.
All the things you'd say, they were never true, never true.
And the games you played, you would always win, always win...

But I set fire, to the rain, watched it burn, as I touched your face. Well it burned and I cried 'cause I heard it screamin' out your name. Your name...

I set fire, to the rain, and I burst, into the flames. Well it fell, somethin' died, 'cause I knew that, that was the last time. The last time...

Annie Sue and Spamela finally joined in to vocalize in the background.

Sometimes I wake up by the door, and now that you've gone, must be waitin' for ya. even now when we're already over, I can't help myself from lookin' for ya.

I set fire, to the rain, watched it burn, as I touched your face. Well it burned and I cried 'cause I heard it screamin' out your name. Your name...

I set fire, to the rain, and I burst, into the flames. Well it fell, somethin' died, 'cause I knew that, that was the last time. The last time, oh, oh no, let it burn, oh. Let it burn! Let it burn...

Rowlf played a different tune on the piano, as Jaz, Annie Sue, and Spamela walked offstage.
"Great job you guys." Kermit said.
"Thanks."
"Thank you sir!"
"Thanks I guess."
"Great job ticklin' the ivories Rowlf!" Kermit called out.
Rowlf smiled and nodded, still playing the piano.
"Now that that's out the way, let's dance Kermit!" Jaz pulled Miss Mousey away, and then danced with Kermit. They made their way to Piggy and Fozzie. Guess who hid their face again? Yup, you guessed it! Fozzie! He was so frightened that Jaz would see him way to close to Miss Piggy than he should be. He was clearly unaware that Jaz knew he was there already. Kermit twirled Jaz,hoping that it would make Piggy jealous, as well as Fozzie, but nothing happened. Fozzie was too occupied with hiding his face in Piggy's shoulder, while Piggy was uninterested in Kermit anyway. Jaz got angrier by the minute. Surprisingly, she hasn't bursted yet... Or at least until this next thing that's gonna happen...
Miss Piggy wrapped his arms around Fozzie even tighter. It made Fozzie look up from her shoulder. "H-Hey, let go!" He squealed. (And since Piggy's there, no pig joke intended.)
"Relax Mon Capitaine..." Piggy whispered.
Fozzie was now shaking, due to uncertainty of Piggy's next action. Piggy smiled. She knew exactly what she was going to do next, but she didn't know Kermit and Jaz weren't going to like it. Piggy pulled back to look at Fozzie's face.
Fozzie, not being able to take a hint, tilts his head. "What?"
Piggy only smiled. "Pucker up Mon Cherri!" Piggy pulled him into a kiss, that Fozzie seriously didn't see coming.
NOW Jaz lost it.
Jaz threw Kermit on the ground.
"What do you think you're doing?!" Jaz yelled.
"Kissing Mon capitaine, of course." Piggy said innocently.
"Your captain? YOUR CAPTAIN?! MY CAPTAIN!! Fozzie, say something!!!" Jaz yelled.
Fozzie remained silent. He wringed his hat in his hands, as usual. He observed how mad Jaz was, and how sad Kermit was, and how everyone was watching, and how Piggy was happy he wasn't saying anything. Wait... Uh oh...
"See? He doesn't like you! He obviously loves Moi, and thinks that vous are a complete lunatic. So why don't vous go 'Set fire to the rain', somewhere else?" Piggy had her hands on her hips, thinking she proved her point.
"I'm about to sing 'Mama said knock you out'!" Jaz was walked up to her, ready to swing, but Fozzie hopped in between them. Jaz was so mad, she started talking through her teeth. You'd be amazed how mad she actually was.
"Fozzie, get out of my way, before I knock YOU out."
Can't argue with that, Fozzie moved.
Jaz punched Piggy right in the jaw. And if you know anything about Piggy, she won't go down without a fight.
"Hiiiiiiiiiiiiiii-Yaaaaaaaaaaaa!!!" Piggy did her good ol' karate chop. Now it was time to lay the smacketh down. Jaz started to pull her hair. "Ow ow ow ow! Let go!" Piggy begged. Jaz wasn't going to stop. She was determined to pull it out. Piggy saw a piece of her hair fly within her reach, and she pulled it.
Nothing happened.
"Guess what? I'm tenderheaded!!!" Jaz yelled.
As Jaz was about to make a swift pull to Piggy's hair, the security guards threw the both of them outside.
As Piggy tried to crawl away, Jaz grabbed her, climbed on top of her, and began to try to choke her out.
(She's violent when she wants to be... xD)
Luckily, before Piggy was like, dead, the police came in, and took Jaz away.
(C'mon, you really think I'd murder my rolemodel? xD)
Fozzie and Kermit rushed outside, as uh... Jaz told Piggy that she was "#1".
"Well... Uh... That was nice..." Fozzie said sarcastically.
"Miss Piggy, are you alright?" Kermit asked.
Piggy nodded as she tried to catch her breath.
"I seriously need to brush my hair, and redo my makeup. Come on Fozzie." Piggy took Fozzie by the hand, and began to walk home. Kermit followed, feeling sadder than a chicken lookin' at his fried brother.
What?
Seriously, that's how he felt.
...
Ok, now put me in a straight jacket.

 

[Misskermie]

And here's this thing that I drew of me choking Piggy.
http://misskermie.deviantart.com/art/Jazzy-said-knock-you-out-308080285
I made myself mad to draw.
Listen to Adele, while thinking of bad moments.
You'll get mad.
BTW, I think she looks wierd.

 

[Yuna Leonhart]

Um, why would we put you in a straight jacket?
But seriously, I liked this chapter. I liked the part when Kermit asked Jaz if she had been planning her plan all day and she denied it
The fight at the end was violent, that's fer sure but I didn't mind. But your little comments in the brackets were a little distracting.

 

[Misskermie]

Um, why would we put you in a straight jacket?

'Cause I'm crazy. Can't you tell?

 

[Yuna Leonhart]

Funny, you don't seem crazy to me *tries to shoo off wrackspurts*