Fanfic: Gobo Fraggle on Match Game Hollywood Squares Hour

[MUPPETFAN1976]

So, it's another one of these Game Show Fanfics again.
Yep. It's been a long time since I've done one of these, but it's back.

A little back story before we begin here.
Match Game Hollywood Squares Hour was a game show on NBC That aired in 1983 and 1984. It combined 2 game shows (obviously). It only lasted a few months.

So, I thought to myself, "Hey. This year is Fraggle Rock's 35th Anniversary. Why not?"
So, the host (Tony Lane) accepted. And even better, he needed an announcer. So, I stepped up. And you'll hear my voice for the first time.

So, enjoy folks. Here's the first segment.





=============================================================================

Announcer: Thanks for watching News 10 NBC.



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http://picosong.com/werRT/
(Matt Bingel Announces, Cheers & Applause)

MATT BINGEL: From Universal Studios Hollywood, it's time for the---

With...

From the center square... the return of--

From The Hollywood Squares...

From Gameshow Marathon...

And the hosts of the Match Game/Hollywood Squares Hour--

And..

*doors open as Doug and Greg enter center stage with their microphones... doors close, wide shot of audience at Universal Studios Hollywood*

Doug: Thank you, Matt. Helloooooo, everybody, and welcome to another Match Game/Hollywood Squares Hour from Universal Studios in Hollywood. Hello stars!

Steven: (As Beetlejuice) Hello Dougie Boy
Jonathan: Hi

Greg: Yes, don't adjust your sets, folks. Tony is here, but he's sitting in the Richard Dawson Suite. I will be hosting Hollywood Squares this episode, and it should be a lot of fun.

Now, one of the reasons we're here at Universal Studios Hollywood is because our old studio over in beautiful downtown Burbank is getting both fumigated.... (audience chuckles), and updated for 4K Ultra HD. (audience ooooohs)

Tony: SPOILER ALERT-- "Split Second" is one of the first being presented in 4K UHD where available.
(Note: Split Second is another game on the group that I'm in)

Greg: One of the few syndicated shows to do so. Not even Wheel and Jeopardy! are doing that. Take that, Pat and Alex!
Doug: Ha ha, there ya go. Special welcome to our guest in the Brett suite, who'll be the center square later -- (audience cheers) -- yes, Bill McDee's back in the house.

How ya been, Bill?

Bill: All things considered, I am quite well thank you Doug, but I do have this urge, sitting in Ms. Somer's position, to ask you if we're going to the motel in Encino after the show

Doug: Sorry, Bill, but I made dinner plans with a lovely blonde named Brittany after the show -- and I don't want to keep her waiting. So, with that, let the games begin.

(audience cheers) (Greg and Doug shake hands; Greg walks over to the lower left square; Doug walks over to players' desks)

 

[MUPPETFAN1976]

And keep the cheering going for our challengers, Nels Snesrud and Lenny Jackson.
(audience cheers)
Let's get acquainted before we start filling in blanks. Nels, please tell us something about yourself.

Nels: I'm 35 and I'm a cashier at target who loves old Nickelodeon game shows like double date and finders keepers

Doug: Ohhhh -- at the risk of making you feel jealous, I met Wesley Eure when he was promoting a Christmas book for children. Great guy.
Good luck to you, Nels. And Lenny, good luck to you as well. Please tell us about you.

Lenny: I am a high school senior from Washington D.C.

Steven: I Didn't Know that Marc Summers did a new show called Double Date Wow i can't wait to check that out
Mark: I'm pretty sure he meant Double Dare

Doug: You guys are sharper than I. I didn't catch "Double Date". My hearing must be going. (scattered laughter from the crowd) Lenny, nice to have you hear from D.C.
Again, good luck as you'll have as many as three chances to match as many...

...of these understudies for the Universal Studios Frog Choir as you possibly can. (scattered laughter from the crowd) Each time you match a star, you win cash. Match all six, get more cash. Match more stars than your opponent, win *more* cash *and* game.
Winner here goes to Hollywood Squares. Winner *there* plays Super Match for a possible $100,000 payoff.
(audience cheers) (Doug pushes button on toaster revealing Round 1 questions)

Nels, please start us off by picking one of these queries -- A or B.

Nels: B.

Doug: B it shall be. (walks to panel) New game, all the stars get to play this question.

Gossip columnist Roma Garrett said, "Game Show Network is producing its first made-for-TV movie. It's titled 'When BLANKS Attack'."

http://dougmorris.net/games/mghshmusic/mghshthink1.mp3


MOMENTS LATER...

All righty then. They're all set, Nels. I'll repeat the question one more time and take your answer.

Gossip columnist Roma Garrett said, "Game Show Network is producing its first made-for-TV movie. It's titled 'When BLANKS Attack'."

Nels: Boobs.

Frankie: (from Hollywood Squares square)
Get me a *cuckoo bird* drink! We're in for a doozy!

Greg: 25 million Americans are thinking the exact same thing.

(as audience boos)
Doug: Nah nah nah nah. Nels, you misunderstood the question. The movie's on Game Show Network -- not Skinemax.
http://www.dougmorris.net/games/sfxaudiencelaff_some_clapping.mp3
Doug: Well -- let's compare answers anyways -- starting with Jonathan.
Jonathan: Big Bucks Big Bucks! No...

(buzz)(audience cheers)

Doug: Now that's more like it. Any antagonist in the game show world would work.

Doug: Bill's ready with his answer. Show and tell.

Bill: In honor of Mr. Barker, I said when (card) Samoans attack.

(buzz) (audience laughs; smatter of applause)

Doug: Ohhhh -- another good one. Interesting no Samoans have come on down since Drew took over. On to Steven.

Steven: How about this one...

(buzz) (scattered laughter)

Doug: Well -- we did get a foolish answer from the player. So -- stands to reason. Let's go down heah to Greg.

Gossip columnist Roma Garrett said, "Game Show Network is producing its first made-for-TV movie. It's titled 'When BLANKS Attack'."

Doug: Nels is hoping by some miracle you said bazooms.

Greg: Considering how much Feud they show....

(buzz) (scattered laughter)

Doug: Yeah, that Steve's everywhere. Like I should talk -- I host three other shows. (scattered laughter) Tony, my regular co-host, what say ye?

Tony: I think this will boost cable ratings... *shows card*

(buzz) (some laugh; others groan)

Doug: If you think about it, that's the closest we've come to matching. Miles apart, though. Sam, please end this half of the round for us.

Sam: There's got to be an easy answer to this!

(buzz) (scattered cheers)

Doug: More whammies to end.

Doug: Bolts of lightning, dragons, bankrupt spaces, they'd also be good ones. Better luck later, Nels.

================================

Rest of the segment coming later. Meanwhile, what do you think so far?

 

[MUPPETFAN1976]

(Doug grabs A)

Doug: Lenny, let's see if you can capitalize and score first in Match Game. (walks to panel) And once again, all the stars get to play.

In Nerdocrumbesia, the nation's sleazy culture starts young. In their version of the nursery rhyme "This Little Piggy", the first little piggy doesn't go to market. The first little piggy goes to BLANK instead.

http://dougmorris.net/games/mghshmusic/mghshthink2.mp3

MOMENTS LATER....

Tony: I heard that Howard Stern is gonna run for the mayor of Nerdocrumbesia for the fifth time. Despite how messed up their community is, Stern's approval ratings had went up by 420%.

(scattered laughter from the crowd)

Doug: Well it's about *high* time.

All right, Lenny, all pencils down over there. Time for you to respond.

In Nerdocrumbesia, the nation's sleazy culture starts young. In their version of the nursery rhyme "This Little Piggy", the first little piggy doesn't go to market. The first little piggy goes to BLANK instead.

Lenny: The butcher shop?

(Greg facepalms)

Greg: Now *I* need a drink.

Bill: That's what I call thinking "outside the box", and I dare say outside all six of our boxes

Frankie: (from Hollywood Squares)
Sammy, another one! I'm getting loaded tonight!


(as audience boos)

Doug: Ohhhh-kay. Well, let's start comparing answers. Jonathan, we start again with you.

Jonathan: That little piggy had a taste for chicken.

(buzz) (scattered groans)

Doug: Sleazy piggy goes to Kentucky Fried, eh? There's a *really* good logical answer. Let's see if Bill thought of it.

Bill: This place is really slimy. This little piggy ran for office and won a pigged...I mean rigged election to go to ... (card) Congress, and what's more this little piggy was the one who began the practice of pork barrel spending bills...

(buzz) (scattered laughter and applause)

Doug: Well, Nerdocrumbesian politicians have been known to be sleazier than the ones here. To Steven, now.

Steven: Well Johnathan just stole my answer so...

(buzz) (audience laughs; smattering of applause)

Doug: Creative answer. They gave a *cheer* to that one. (scattered groans) As they turn on me, let's go to Greg.


In Nerdocrumbesia, the nation's sleazy culture starts young. In their version of the nursery rhyme "This Little Piggy", the first little piggy doesn't go to market. The first little piggy goes to BLANK instead.

Doug: And Lenny said "butcher shop".

Greg: Ever had pickled pork?

(buzz)

Greg: A place of ill repute. (scattered laughter)

Doug: I was thinking of another place of ill repute. Let's see if Tony came up with it.

Tony: Looks to me that the first little piggy had went hog wild. So wild, in fact, he had eaten the entire all you can eat buffet at...

(buzz) (scattered groans)

Doug: Not the kind of free plug they wanted. That and the chicken. Sam, wrap this round up for us, please.

Sam: If we're talking sleazy, well, I might be wrong but hey, I had a go anyways.

(buzz) (scattered groans)

Doug: The bank? Huh-kay. I might be showing my age on this -- but I thought for sure someone here would say the first Nerdocrumbesian piggy would go to -- Porky's!

(audience laughs)

Doug: Welp -- one round's in the books and we've got an exciting pitchers' duel going on here. (scattered laughter from the crowd) Round 2 starts when you come back to Universal Studios in Hollywood.

http://www.dougmorris.net/games/mghshmusic/mghshthemeapplausecheers_commercial1.mp3

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Alright. Segment 1 is complete. The 2nd Segment will be coming Soon. (Make sure you tell me what you think so far. I'm curious to know)

 

[MUPPETFAN1976]

Sorry bout the long wait y'all.
Been tryin to get this thing together.

And now...Segment 2 (Part 1)

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(audience cheers)

Welcome back to Universal Studios Hollywood.

(Doug presses button on toaster revealing Round 2 questions)

Normally, our leading player starts us off. But we're scoreless. Since Nels started Round 1, Lenny, you may select Question A or Question B.

Lenny: I'll take B, please.

(Doug grabs B; walks to panel)

B it is -- and since we're scoreless, all stars play both questions in this round. Here comes the first one.

Oh -- this is another borderline salute to a segment on "Animaniacs". You'll catch on to it quickly.

Good idea: Reciting the works of William Shakespeare in drama class.

Bad idea: Reciting the works of BLANK in drama class.

(audience laughs; smatter of applause)
http://dougmorris.net/games/mghshmusic/mghshthink8.mp3

MOMENTS LATER...

Tony: Just to let everyone know... I would like to say that today is the final day for the Sesame Street characters in our show. They've been here with us all week long and everyone here on our presentation... we thank them all.

(applause)

Bill: I would give the Muppets a hand, but they already have one

(scattered laughter)

Doug: I see what you did there, Bill.

Greg's ready -- as is the rest of the group. Lenny, here's the question again.

Good idea: Reciting the works of William Shakespeare in drama class.

Bad idea: Reciting the works of BLANK in drama class.

Lenny: Stephen King?

Tony: Somebody tell the bartender to send me a bottle of Jack Daniels!

Steven: Can We Get 2 New players Tony?

Sam: Now, now, no need to start complaining about the contestants please!

(as audience boos)

Doug: Stephen King. Well -- that'll freak out fellow classmates all right. But let's see what the panel came up with Jonathan.

Jonathan: Two words...

(buzz) (scattered laughter)

Doug: Unless teach is one of her monsters, that'll upset teach for sure. Bill?

Bill: I regret that I'll be stepping on the tail feathers of our NBC Peacock with my answer.

Doug: Uh oh.

Doug: Bad idea to recite in drama class -- the words of the long defunct and canceled NBC daytime drama...

(buzz) (audience laughs)

Doug: (laughs) I'm impressed people still remember that show. Not that I was a fan. Steven, what say ye?

Steven: (card)

(buzz) (a few laugh)

Doug: Sia -- ohhh-kay. This round's taking a weird turn as we go to Greg.

Good idea: Reciting the works of William Shakespeare in drama class.

Bad idea: Reciting the works of BLANK in drama class.

Doug: And Lenny said Stephen King.

Greg: Unless you want to sound like Meat Loaf....

(buzz) (a few laugh)

Doug: Writer of the singer's songs. Tony, what do you offer?

Tony: Two words... (card)

(buzz) (audience laughs and applauds)

Doug: Ohhhh -- good one. And Sam, bring this half of the round home.

Sam: This one is a hard one...

(buzz)

Doug: I was thinking Seth MacFarlane. (scattered cheers) Obviously some fans. Brilliant mind -- but a good chunk of his work is controversial.

Doug: Welp, Lenny, it can only go up from here. Nels wants his score to go up in the next question.


-------------------------------------------------------

Rest of the segment coming up.

 

[MUPPETFAN1976]

And now Part 2 of Segment 2.

----------------------------------------------------------------

(Doug grabs A; walks to panel)

And once again, all six stars get to play this question -- as we plug another network again.

I have a TV Guide listing. Tuesday night, CBS, "Bull". Disaster nearly strikes in the courtroom when Bull goes on a blind date and ends up with a BLANK.

(audience laughs; smatter of applause) (think music plays)

Bill: I am so ashamed right now... (laying my head on my desk)

(scattered laughter)

Doug: This could get to be an interesting half of the round.

Nels, you're all set. Here's the question for you again.

I have a TV Guide listing. Tuesday night, CBS, "Bull". Disaster nearly strikes in the courtroom when Bull goes on a blind date and ends up with a BLANK.

Nels: A Black Eye.

Bill: I never heard of this show or that character so my answer varies from I dare say a majority of the panel.

Frankie: (from Hollywood Squares) I don't know if that is a good answer or not. Guess I'll take another drink waiter.

Grover: Right away sir!

(scattered groans)

Doug: Well -- I can understand that if he went out with my ex-girlfriend. (scattered laughter from the crowd) She just loved to pick fights. I'll just leave it at that. Jonathan, we start with you again.

Jonathan: Must have been some date.

(buzz)

(audience laughs and applauds)

Doug: Niiiiiiice. No match though as we go to Bill.

Bill: What else would you expect somebody named "Bull" to date...

(buzz)

(audience boos)

Bill: I've never watched this show, never even heard of it to be perfectly honest.

Doug: Because it's on another network. That's why. Steven, what do you bring to the table?

Steven: (slurring) Well here it is. Han... (hiccups) hangover.

(buzz)

(audience laughs and applauds)

Doug: Steven's on his way to becoming this generation's Foster Brooks. No black eyes as we visit Greg.

I have a TV Guide listing. Tuesday night, CBS, "Bull". Disaster nearly strikes in the courtroom when Bull goes on a blind date and ends up with a BLANK.

Greg: You see, what happened is, they went to a really swanky bar in New York, and the blind date challenged him to a game of "Never Have I Ever..." It turned out that Bull had done so many things this other date didn't do that he just *had* to take multiple shots. So.... he ended up with a....

(buzz)

(audience laughs and applauds)

Doug: Another hangover. Tony?

Tony: Take two and call me in the morning, Dr. Phil...

(buzz)

(scattered applause)

Doug: Hangover seems to be the answer. And Sam, wrap this up.

Sam: Must've been drinking again. Boy do they give you bad headaches!

(buzz)

(scattered applause)

Doug: Another hangover. Ohhh drat.

Doug: Welp, we end Round 2 the way we started -- scoreless. We've *gotta* get a match somehow -- because someone's going to Squares. Find out who wins -- after this.

http://www.dougmorris.net/games/mghshmusic/mghshthemeapplausecheers_commercial1.mp3

 

[MUPPETFAN1976]

Here's the next segment, but first a little peek at my voiceover talent (this was a part of the original thread).

=======================================================================================================

*fade to promo*

http://picosong.com/wCtmH/

(cheers and applause)

MATT BINGEL: Closed Captioning sponsored today by the following--

(audience cheers)

Doug: And welcome back to Universal Studios Hollywood.

Round 3 of Match Game -- where we've had anything but. (scattered laughter from the crowd) But somehow that will change. Nels, you'll start us off by picking A or B, please.

Nels: B

(Doug grabs B; walks to panel)

Doug: Going for B. And -- once again -- all the stars play.

Confucius say, "Seven consecutive days without rest make one BRANK".

http://dougmorris.net/games/mghshmusic/mghshthink5.mp3

(Doug talks to floor director) Doug: I hear ya. End one era to start another. Makes sense.

Okay, they're all set. Nels, question again.

Confucius say, "Seven consecutive days without rest make one BRANK".

Nels: Sleep. I drew a blank.

Gobo: Somebody get me a drink out here! And fast! Please!

(as audience boos)

Doug: Welp -- I did get an answer before the buzzer sounded. Unfortunately, I sense the buzzer's gonna sound six times. (scattered laughter and applause) Let's go through this quickly -- as the judge already has his buzzer finger poised. Jon?

Jonathan: What it makes all of us...

(buzz) (scattered laughter)

Doug: A lot better than his answer. But there's a really good answer if you think about it. Bill?

Bill: The definitive answer...

(buzz) (audience cheers)

Bill: And never forget, after Between Tuesday and Saturday the calendar says "W T F".

(audience laughs; smatter of applause)

Doug: Which is what a lot of folks playing along at home said. Get the joke, now, Nels? Seven straight days make one week or weak? On to Steve.

Steven: Well I don't know how to speak Chinese but if i don't get rest for 7 days I will get...

(buzz) (scattered laughter)

Doug: An incoming staff member at Crag: The Numbers Game speaks fluent Chinese. We might arrange lessons during the next stopdown -- which can't come soon enough. (scattered laughter) Let's just keep on keepin' on with Greg.

Greg: The correct answer...

(buzz) (audience cheers)

Doug: Yeppers. Tony?

Tony: (in Asian accent) O-ho... Velly intwresting question, Dougras-san. Arthough, I have mastered the art of Kung-Foo-shun, I have been taught a varuable ression. Having 7 days without lest makes one doofus (card) one cwanky dude. Arigato!

(buzz) (scattered laughter from the crowd)

Tony: (normal voice) My apologies please...

Doug: If you listen carefully, you can hear my new staffer at Crag drafting the complaint letter now. (more laughter) Sam, by some miracle, did you say "sleep"?

Sam: (shakes head) Simple as that, you just get...

(buzz) (scattered applause from the crowd)

Doug: Lotta grumpy and cranky with the ultimate punny answer of weak.

Doug: Well -- Lenny -- one question left in Match Game. You just need *one* match to win. If you don't match anyone, you both forfeit, our Squares champ plays Super Match automatically and we'll spend the rest of the show apologizing to my new staffer at Crag for this Confucius question. (scattered laughter from the crowd) Actually, if this ends in a scoreless tie, we play a tie-breaker as if we break any other tie.

 

[MUPPETFAN1976]

Well this thing hasn't been revived for months. I apologize on that. You see, I'm a college man now. Just about to start my 2nd semester on Monday, but it doesn't hurt to continue this. So, let's continue. Shall we?

----------------------------------

And one more time, all six stars get to write -- as Ray writes us up.

(scattered laughter)

(HEAR DOUG SAY IT) http://picosong.com/wCQgF/

Old Man Perrywinkle said, "Popeye the Sailor Man often sings he's strong to the finish because he always eats spinach. Since marrying my 19-year-old wife, I can sing that I'm strong as Niagara because I take BLANK."

http://dougmorris.net/games/mghshmusic/mghshthink6.mp3

(audience laughs; smatter of applause)

Greg: (I write my answer down) Lenny, if you don't get this... well, we're gonna have problems.

Sam: (inserts card) Yeah, like a scoreless tie breaker, has it ever happened before on this show?

Bill: Since Greg and I matched on the last question, and there were other panelists who matched one another, do we get any prize money? And with a pitcher's duel going on, my apologies to the Environmental Protection Agency, 43 trees were chopped down for the 30 or so cards we panelists have used so far during this game, to no avail.

_________________________________

Note From Tony (this was from the original thread) : Frank, Gobo, and Kevin... be on standby for "The Hollywood Squares" with Greg Palmer. And Steve Anderson... while you're on standby as our champ, is there a possibility if you could please create a lighted name for "GOBO"? Thank you in advance.

Donna Jean: He’ll have Gobo wired in later on today.

Gobo: I'm more ready than I'll ever be!

Frankie: I'm ready to go! In fact, I have some radishes for my buddy Gobo.

______________________________________-

Tony: If Lenny doesn't get a match, I'm gonna go back to The Burbank Studios and tape "Split Second" immediately.

Doug: Sam, to your point, I do recall on the original MG-HSH that a MG went scoreless after three rounds -- much to Gene's dismay. Only match, of course, came in the tie-breaker.

Let's see if history repeats itself here. Lenny, here's the query one more time.

(HEAR DOUG SAY IT) http://picosong.com/wCQgF/

Old Man Perrywinkle said, "Popeye the Sailor Man often sings he's strong to the finish because he always eats spinach. Since marrying my 19-year-old wife, I can sing that I'm strong as Niagara because I take BLANK."

Lenny: Viagra!

Bill: (standing ovation)

Nels: I'm done

Tony: Don't be so bummed out, Nels. You have played a good game, though.

Greg: You may be finished with this game, but you're going home with some nice parting gifts (not real, of course, but still).

Nels: I know but still would like to play the Hollywood squares portion but hey it happens

Sam: By jove, he got it!

(as audience cheers)

Doug: Now that's what I call putting the context clues together. Now you've gotta hope one of these dingbats thought of viagra. (scattered laughter from the crowd) Jon, we start with you. What do you bring to the table?

Jonathan: You’ll get the point

(scattered cheers)

Greg: There are several blue tablets that have name brands we can't say on TV!

Doug: Wait -- the judge actually is thinking this over.

(ding)

(dings; audience cheers)

Doug: Judge accepts. It's a win. Now -- just to sort of prove this out and considering there's bonus money involved -- we'll keep comparing answers one by one. Lenny, each additional match pays $100. If you match all six, you win an extra $400. You do have another $500 coming your way for winning Match Game. So -- Bill -- your answer.

Bill: It has to be...

(ding; audience applause)

Doug: Exact match with illustration. So, Lenny's legit going to Hollywood Squares. To Steve now.

Steve: (as Beetlejuice) For the win...

(ding; audience applause)

Doug: Three viagras -- but they only count as one match. To Greg.

Greg: (singing) VIVAAAAAA.... VIVAAAAAAAA... (scattered laughter and applause)

(ding; audience applause)

Doug: That's four. Tony?

Tony: I see that Old Man Perrywinkle was a millionaire Playboy. I don't even know what the heck "Playboy" means. (scattere laughter) Anyhow... I remember the ol' Perry-meister had sung that he's strong as Niagara... 'cause he took his--

(ding; audience applause)

Doug: There's five! Sam, do you make it unanimous?

Sam: It's gotta rhyme hasn't it?

Doug: Yes.

Sam: (card)

(ding; audience applause)

http://www.dougmorris.net/games/mghshmusic/mghshthemeapplausecheers_win_in_mg.mp3
(dings; audience applause; win music plays; MG-HSH theme plays)

Doug: And there's the perfecto! $1500 in total. Lenny, please join me here. Nels, no money here -- but some fine gifts from the Match Game. Nice hand for Nels.

(more cheers; MG desks roll off stage left; rest of grid rolls in from stage right)

Doug: Lenny, please stand by -- because *Greg* will host Hollywood Squares, three more panelists will join us -- and I'm going to make an apology call to Ray. Matt, floor's yours!

 

[MUPPETFAN1976]

(underscore theme, Matt narrates)
https://picosong.com/wCttv/


MATT: A member of our studio audience will receive a flokati rug. From Janis Imports, this all wool rug can be used as a wall-hanging, a bed throw or in front of your fireplace. Adds warmth and beauty to your home. A flokati rug from Janis Imports.

And some of our departing contestants will receive--


The Mr. Coffee Ultronic System. Space-aged technology for the best cup of coffee on this planet or any other. Furnished by Mr. Coffee.

A supply of Fla-Vor-Aid. Makes you glad you're thirsty. Regular or pre-sweetened with 100% NutraSweet. Assorted delicious flavors. One package makes two quarts. Fla-Vor-Aid.

The White's Metal Detector. Featuring ground-exclusion balance to help you locate coins, jewelry and precious metals -- while excluding mineralized soil. From White's Electronics.

And from Hawaiian Tropic comes this beach mat and a set of Hawaiian Tropic suntan oils and lotions. Aloha!

And now... it's time for more of the--

With...

From Caesars Challenge...

(cheers and applause)

From Fraggle Rock...

(cheers and applause)

From Wheel of Fortune...

(cheers and applause)

And, taking over... the guest master of The Hollywood Squares... Greg Palmer!


(wild cheers and applause)


*Doug passes the mic to Greg as he enters center stage*


Thanks, Matt. I can't believe I'm saying that. Viagra wins the day and fifteen hundred bucks for Lenny. We'll see if he can add to that right after these important messages.


(cheers and applause continue)

*fade to commercial*

--------------------------------------------------



(main theme, Matt Bingel announces, cheers and applause)
https://picosong.com/wCadz/

Matt Bingel: And now... Greg Palmer and The Hollywood Squares.


(cheers and applause)


Greg: Thank you, Matt Bingel. Welcome to the second half of our show, The Hollywood Squares. Believe it or not, we're here at Stage 37, the exact soundstage where the John Davidson version taped 30 years ago. Hello, stars!

EVERYONE: Hello, Greg!

GOBO: Hello, Tom Bergeron!

GILBERT GOTTFRIED: YOU FOOL!!!!

Greg: Believe it or not, I do base my hosting style for this show on Mr. Bergeron. Anyway, let's welcome again the three new stars added to our panel.


First off, from the all-new Caesar's Challenge, Frank Satori! (audience cheers)


From Fraggle Rock on HBO Family and HBO Now, it's Gobo! (audience cheers)


And finally, from Wheel of Fortune and several other shows, Kevin Kolsen! (audience cheers)


So, Gobo, I understand that Fraggles represent the very pinnacle of civilization and culture and are, supposedly, the best of all possible creatures. What are you doing hanging around Silly Creatures like us?

Gobo: Well, this year, according to the silly creatures, is Fraggle Rock's 35th Anniversary.

(applause and cheers)

Yes. Thank you. And apparently, the silly creatures love Fraggle Rock. Right, silly creatures?

(applause and cheers)

I guess so.
Anyways, if you remember, 5 years ago, my very good friends Red and Mokey went to something called Dragon Con in Atlanta, Georgia.
(folks from Atlanta cheer and applause)

I guess they know.

Anyways, the silly creatures I work with wanted me to do some promoting for this big anniversary.
And besides, my Uncle, Travelling Matt, travelled all over the world when the show was on. So, now it's my turn to explore the world and meet these wonderful fans.

(applause and cheers)


Greg: And if they come back with a reboot, I'm sure you'll take your uncle's place, I'm sure. Nice having you here. Anyway, let's get it on!

(audience cheers as Lenny and I walk to our respective lecterns in the gameplay area)

Greg: Lenny, you'll be sitting here in the O position. Already over here in the X position is our returning champion, who has a 1-day total of $41,250. Please welcome back Steven Anderson! (audience cheers)


Hiya, Steven. Please remind us who you are and what you do.


Steven: I'm originally from Plymouth Massachusetts where I am engaged in Retail Foodservice, Party Decor, and the Propagation of Cranberries, not necessarily all that the same time. I enjoy Karaoke, Pro sports on television and I collect "My Little Pony" Plush and Figurines.

Greg: Ah, My Little Pony. So, I take it you saw the movie with Sia that came out last year?

Steven: Yes I did. Wish her character got a little more development but I’m not a producer. She’s a great musician though

 

[MUPPETFAN1976]

Greg: I'll say she is. And with over 41-grand, you can buy plenty of her albums. Good luck to you. Let's get on with the game.

Object of the players is to get three stars in a row--

--either across....

up and down.....

or diagonally.....



It's up to them to figure out if the answers the stars are giving them are correct or fake news. (audience chuckles) That's how they get the square. Each square is worth $250, and we play until we hear the old school bell. Whoever is ahead at the end of this portion will be the champion and gets to play the Super Match for a chance to win up to $100,000.


(cheers and applause)

First game is worth $1,000. Good luck to you both. Steve, you're the champion, you get to start. Pick a square, please.



Steve A.: Greg Please

Greg: (cheers and applause)


That's he, Bill McDee! The closest thing we have to Bill Cullen nowadays. Bill....



True or false...... all three hosts of American Top 40 have hosted a game show at one time or another.



Bill: I'm deeply honored and humbled at the comparison to Mr. Cullen. Thank you.
Coincidentally, all three of them also used to work at my local pancake house. It's a job they really flipped for.
As for all three of them hosting a game show previously, that is in fact a true statement Greg.


Steve A.: 100%, Hollywood Squares and Click I agree


Greg: Ryan hosted Click among many other shows, Shadoe hosted a week of Hollywood Squares, and Casey Kasem hosted 100%. X, gets the square!

(applause, ding)

Lenny, your turn.


Lenny: I'll go for Steven

(cheers and applause)

Greg: Steven Solsak! I think he's Beetlejuice today. Steven....

What did the Pony Express transport to California?


Steve S.: All of the Postcards from Gobo's Uncle Matt


*Gobo gives a dirty look to Solsak*


Bill: (chuckling)


Lenny: I disagree.

Greg: Case of generic vs. specific. The mail. Circle, gets the square.

(applause, ding)

Steven, blocked horizontally. Where will you go next?


Steve A.: Doug Morris

Doug: I'm down heah!

(cheers and applause)


Doug Morris! From On a Roll. Doug, here's your question.


What pop superstar often wrote under the alias Alexander Nevermind?


Doug: Max Headroom?

(a few in crowd left)

I'm showing my age, aren't I?

No, it's gotta be the guy who came *THIS* close to being an American idol. He's worked with the surviving members of Queen. Adam Lambert.


Steve A.: I Disagree

Greg: Mr. "Purple Rain", Prince. X, gets the square!

(applause, ding)

Lenny, I think you know where you have to go at this point.


Lenny: Kevin for the block

(cheers and applause)


Kevin Kolsen! Lenny, if you get this right, you get the block. Otherwise, we'll wrap up our first segment with a win for the champ. Kevin....



What U.S. president loved Fresca so much he had a soda tap installed for the Oval Office?



Kevin: You sure it wasn't Diet Coke? Two scoops of ice cream can do that to you.

*laughter*

I believe Lyndon Johnson was a big fan of Fresca. I'll say he did that.


Greg: For the block......

Lenny: I definitely agree

Kevin: Good move!

Greg: Yes, it was a good move. L-B-J was the president. Circle, gets the square!

(applause, ding)

[COMMERCIAL CUE]
http://www.dougmorris.net/games/mghshmusic/mghshtheme_ticketplug.mp3


This is turning into a tie ballgame of its own, isn't it? We'll be back with the exciting conclusion to this game, plus we'll also start our Secret Square game. But first, a word from your local NBC station. You're watching M-G-H-S on NBC.


(cheers and applause)