FanFic: A Little Knight Music

[Muppet Newsgirl]

Well, gang, I've decided to post a story of my own, contribute to the delightful state of madness on the forum. It's a mystery, a comedy, a slice-of-life vignette and assorted other stuff.

Kermit and the others are getting ready to present a new play, a musical loosely based on the legend of King Arthur, with a decidedly Muppet twist. However, there is a mysterious criminal called the Killer Fish, who has been going around setting fire and/or wreaking havoc at area theaters. And the Muppet Theater is next on his (her?) hit list.

Will the show go on? Or will the Killer Fish make the show die before Statler and Waldorf have had a chance to heckle it?

The star of this one is, once again, Scooter. He's a popular lad, our Scooter.
The story also involves a newcomer to the cast at the theater, a girl named Nora.
Let me make something VERY clear. This story takes place in an alternate universe from Sadie's Stories, so if Scooter's friendship with Nora seems to be a bit more than platonic, don't panic or scream or throw any salvos at me, okay?
There are some other differences between Sadie's Stories and this one, but like I said, alternate universe.
All right, without further ado, here is the prologue of 'A Little Knight Music,' or its alternate title, 'Attack of the Killer Fish.'

---------

Prologue

"Yes…all right, Mr. Woodward, it'll be in tomorrow. I think we'll blow this scandal wide open yet." The reporter gently set the phone back down on the hook with a click and turned her attention back to the story files scattered all over her desk.

She picked one up and opened it, slowly but deliberately sifting through the articles in it.

No Suspects in Cambridge Theater Vandalism…'Fishy' Scent at Scene Baffles Police…Detectives Name Serial Attacker 'The Killer Fish;' Suspect's Whereabouts Unknown…

The phone rang again. "Hello?" The reporter asked in her usual clipped mid-Atlantic-with-traces-of-New Jersey accent.

"It's Leland," the somber male voice said on the other end.

The reporter sat up straighter, frowning. "It's hard to tell with someone like you, Leland, but I'm going to guess that something's happened."

"It's the Fish."

The reporter glanced over at the files. "Which theater was it?"

"The Kenworthy Place Theater. The place was torched, the sets and scripts ruined, and the whole place smelled like dead fish when the police got there."

The reporter nodded grimly. "It fits the pattern of what they saw up in Boston three years ago."

Leland sighed. "I think we know what the Fish is ultimately after."

"The one at number 10, Central Hunt Street. The one they used to call the Benny Vendergast Memorial Theater." The reporter tapped one of her pens on the desk.

"Right, and Closter's really starting to worry. He's got two godchildren working at that theater, and he promised their father on the man's deathbed that he'd keep them out of trouble."

The reporter glanced at her watch. "I can work the case from my end, but I can't really pull leave. We're investigating a huge mess involving the mayor, some prank calls and a huge vat of chocolate syrup."

"Right…hang on." Leland clamped his hand over the phone, but the reporter could hear him calling, "I want green peppers and extra mushrooms on mine. No anchovies, got it?" He picked the phone back up. "Sorry, got sidetracked."

"I'll start making phone calls. Keep me posted on whatever happens. And tell Closter to just keep an eye on the kids…how old are they now?"

"I think they're both sixteen." Leland said. "I have to go now."

The reporter put the phone back down and leaned back in thought. Outside in the night, thunder rumbled, signaling the end of the prologue and the start of act one.

 

[Muppet Newsgirl]

Act One, Scene One:


It was a rainy, torrential Saturday morning in September, the kind best spent inside before a roaring fire. Or perhaps on a gondola traveling through the streets, if the rain got bad enough. The weather reports predicted flash flooding in some areas, and there were already cases of downed power lines.

The Electric Mayhem would nearly have to strap pontoons to their bus to get to the Muppet Theater on Hunt Street, and everyone else involved with the theater would almost need scuba gear.

Scooter Hunt or Scooter Grosse, or even Scooter Hunt-Grosse, depending on which name you wanted to use for him, was among the first to arrive. The red-haired, bespectacled junior stage manager and gofer par excellence zipped into the parking lot on his skateboard. He usually rode his bicycle to the theater, but it was in the shop having its shifters repaired.

Scooter came to a stop and nearly skidded into the already flooded back alley. He gripped his skateboard under one arm, sloshed his way through the almost knee-high water ("Light drizzle, my Aunt Nancy," he thought grimly) and hurried up the steps to the side door. "If it rains any more we could bring a boat back here," he said to himself.

Dave Goelz and Jerry Nelson paddled by in a bright red rowing shell, with Richard Hunt acting as coxswain.

"Stroke! Stroke! Bail! Weigh enough! Dave, straighten up that right oar…how ya doing, Scooter?" Richard lowered his megaphone and waved up at Scooter.

"Wet!" Scooter called cheerfully.

"Yeah, well, join the club…we'll swing by later this afternoon if we don't drown!" Richard turned back to the others. "All right, back to it! Stroke! Stroke…iceberg right ahead!"

Okay, so it was actually the remains of a demolished Studebaker (not Fozzie's, by the way), but Scooter let the three yellow slicker and rain hat-clad sailors negotiate their way around the newly created channel as he went inside to the comparatively dry theater.

He clomped into the darkened backstage area, nearly slipping on a few puddles of water. A light coming from one of the upstairs offices told him that Kermit had already arrived. He peeled off his raincoat, dropped it on the coat rack down by the canteen, pulled off the black knee-high rain boots he had borrowed from his uncle and went to test the theater's circuit board and power supply. He flipped the switches back and forth: main stage, house lights, backstage one, backstage two, labs, furnace, control room.

"All circuits normal, boss," he called into his walkie-talkie. "We won't have to use the generator."

"That's good, Scooter. Bring up the house and stage lights. And dig out the scripts for this week's show, make sure everyone gets a copy as they come in," Kermit replied.

"Right, boss. Over and out." Scooter clipped his walkie-talkie to his belt, unzipped his backpack and pulled out his favorite green jacket. He threw it on, grabbed his clipboard and started turning on the house lights.

It was the start of another, though somewhat wetter than usual, day at the Muppet Theater.


-----

Here's the first little bit. More to follow soon, class/work schedules and mental energy permitting!

 

[ReneeLouvier]

Oh my goodness! This is a great story, Muppet Newsgirl! I'm really liking this a whole lot!

And no, I won't tar and feather you because you're using Scooter. He's not my character at all! He's everyone's character!!

 

[Muppet Newsgirl]

I was going to save the next part for tomorrow, but since you asked so nicely...

Act One, Scene Two:

Later that afternoon, business was moderate down at the Coming Unbound bookshop and dramatic library on 33 West Henson Street, the main drag in the city. It was here that all the area theaters went to order in scripts for plays, ever since the shop's opening three years earlier.

Louise Farley, plump, fortyish and magenta-skinned with a brassy voice and a curly mop of blond hair, hammered away at the computer keyboard behind her desk, trying to make heads or tails of Coming Unbound's database of plays.

The phone on her desk rang. She snatched it up without bothering to take her pen out of her mouth. "Coming Unbound, where the play's the thing but the books are nice too, what can I do ya for?" She nodded curtly. "Uh-huh…yeah. Came in just yesterday…okay, I'll send my assistant by with them in a bit. Talk to ya later, greenstuff." She clapped the phone down on the hook.

"Nora? Nora!" Mrs. Farley screeched over one shoulder. "Got a job for you, kiddo!"

The teenaged Muppet came running out from the back room, juggling three boxes of books. "Yes, boss?" Nora dropped the books and shoved her dark blue bangs out of her face.

Mrs. Farley leaned over and hefted a box onto the desk. "Got a call from Kermit up at the theater. They want to do 'Crazy for You' for one of their next shows, and I had to order in the scripts for them." She pointed to the box. "Get the scripts up there, won't you? Also, there's a book on stage combat that needs to get up there, too. They're putting on some play called 'A Little Knight Music.'"

Nora glanced out the window, and her periwinkle-blue face fell. Rain poured down in sheets, and she could have sworn she had just seen Jim and Jane Henson rowing by in a gondola. "Can't I wait until the rain lets up?"

"Sorry, kiddo, Kermit needs the scripts and the book pronto. Just throw a garbage bag or something over the box." With that, Mrs. Farley turned back to re-programming the archive's database.

Nora groaned, hefted the box up and went to the back storage room, where she had stashed her raincoat and bike. She stuffed the box and book into a plastic bag, tethered it to her bike's basket and pulled on her two-sizes too large gray raincoat, a hand-me-down from her older brother Michael, now away at college.

She braced herself and pedaled outside. It was like being hit by several buckets of water. The Muppet Theater, if she remembered correctly, was at 10 Central Hunt Street. As she began to pedal through the driving rain, a bright red rowing shell passed her through one of the flooded alleyways.

"Stroke! Stroke!"

"All right, pull over, I want to be the coxswain for a while."

"Hold your horses, Dave, we agreed that we wouldn't change places until the corner of Casson Street and Harris Lane."

-----

Ten minutes later, Nora pedaled into the alley alongside the Muppet Theater, shivering, wet and muttering about turning to rust.

The door was propped open. She could hear music and a lot of loud banging and crashing coming from inside. She sighed. They must have a lot of fun in there, she thought.

Though an avid bookworm, and though she loved working at Coming Unbound, Nora secretly wanted to be one of the resident troupe at the Muppet Theater.

Come on, Nora, you've got work to do, she thought.

Nora chained her bike in the empty bike rack by the front door (she didn't dare park her bike in the back alley), hefted the plastic-covered box of scripts up and began climbing up the steps.

------

By this time, the theater was in its usual state of chaos.

"Uh, Kermit, we've got a problem. The Amazing Herbert and his Philosophizing Salamanders had to cancel," Scooter said grimly, surveying his clipboard. "They couldn't see the logic of doing the show."

"That's okay. What about Madame Braggadocio?"

"Laryngitis."

"The Invisible Man?"

"Nowhere to be found."

Kermit groaned. "What is it, Friday the thirteenth or something?"

"No, that was last week. We blew out twenty circuits and the roof collapsed that day, remember?"

"Fine…okay, listen, Scooter, move the Chowder and Marching Society to just after Gonzo's act, change the order of the first two musical numbers and get Anya LaRusse on the phone." Kermit said.

"Right…hold it, Chief, we've got two women named Anya LaRusse on file."

Kermit slapped his forehead. "I'd forgotten that."

"I think the one you want is the sax player from Paris. She's also Czar Nicholas II's great-granddaughter."

"Yes, that's her. See if she's willing to perform on this week's show, and maybe brainstorm some other acts we could book."

Scooter nodded, took out a pen and scribbled a few notes on his clipboard.

"But don't call Andy the Armadillo. He nearly tanked that staging of Jack and the Beanstalk, and we're still trying to repair the drywall in the dressing room. Speaking of which, could you call the contractor and ask where the heck our shipment of drywall is, though not exactly in those words?"

"I'm on it, head honcho."

"Thanks a lot, Scooter. You're worth your weight in gold…at least you would be if our budget around here was a little bigger." Kermit said. "All right, everyone, standby for 'Bella Bella,'" he called as he ran off.

 

[ReneeLouvier]

Ooh, this is just so cute!!! *squealing* I love it when Scooter's center-stage!!

 

[Muppet Newsgirl]

Oh my goodness! This is a great story, Muppet Newsgirl! I'm really liking this a whole lot!

And no, I won't tar and feather you because you're using Scooter. He's not my character at all! He's everyone's character!!

Very glad to hear you say so, Renee. I put all that stuff in at the beginning so that people who read Sadie's Stories wouldn't be confused by the apparently conflicting storylines and character arcs.

Of course, maybe I'm just overly cautious. Just ask my family; they'll drink to that.

 

[Muppet Newsgirl]

Act One, Scene Three:

"What? Sent by mistake to Outer Mongolia…three months. All right, Mr. Harcourt, thank you." Scooter hung up the phone, wondered at the red tape involved with contractors, and started pawing slowly through the "Potential Guest Star" files as a group of pigs in traditional Italian costumes nudged past.

Animal ran by, yelling "Woman! Woman!" Three of Lew Zealand's fish went sailing by, and one nearly smacked Scooter in the head. A huge explosion went off in the basement as Dr. Bunsen Honeydew appeared with a shell-shocked Beaker.

"Well, Beakie, I don't think we'll be using the radish-powered automatic salad spinner for a bit," Bunsen said lightly.

"Meep meep, meep meeeee," Beaker said, trembling, as the two went off.

Scooter sighed. What else was new? He picked up the phone to dial the blue-blooded sax player.

He suddenly heard a shriek and a loud thump at the bottom of the stairs. It was unusual enough to make him throw the phone back on the hook and run to see what had happened.

A pretty, blue-skinned girl lay sprawled on the floor just outside the canteen, a large book and a box of smaller books scattered all over her.

"Hey, are you all right?" Scooter asked as he ran down to help. He had nearly reached the bottom of the stairs when he slipped on something and fell. "Whoa! Ow…"

The girl sat up, rubbing her side. "I think that's what did it."

Scooter noticed a few banana peels sitting on the steps. "Fozzie…" He looked over at the girl. "I'm sorry, it's just that Fozzie was going through the banana sketch with Gags Beazley, and…well, you know."

"That's okay, I'm used to things falling apart where I work." The girl stood up, dusting off her raincoat. "I'm Nora. I'm from the Coming Unbound bookshop." She started scooping scripts back into the box.

"I'm Scooter. I'm the gofer and assistant stage manager," Scooter said as he helped Nora lift the box of scripts up. He looked over at her. "Don't you go to Philip Casson High School?"

"Yeah, I do," Nora said as they started climbing up. She winced as she felt a twinge of pain worm through her right ankle.

"Did you sprain something?" Scooter asked, concerned.

"Think so." Nora leaned over and clutched at her ankle.

"Okay, don't put your weight on it so much." Scooter pointed to a chair next to the curtains. "Wait there, make yourself comfortable, and I'll go grab the receipt for the scripts." Scooter took the book and the box of scripts and ran up the steps to Kermit's office.

Nora sat down on the chair, massaging her ankle and watching the hustle and bustle going on around her.

"And if Miss Piggy comes by muttering something about Gonzo and a watermelon, I'd suggest you run for cover," Scooter called over his shoulder.

"Got it," Nora answered cheerfully. Looks like I came in time, she thought with amusement, watching the company out on stage go through "Bella Bella." The cast was at the moment doing its level best to bungle the song, much to Kermit's dismay.

------

Scooter ran along the short hallway to Kermit's office, plunked the scripts and the book of stage combat down on a chair, and began ferreting through the stacks of paper on the desk for the receipt.

He eventually found it buried beneath a few playbills and a stack of takeout menus from House of the Rising Dim Sum.

That girl…Nora, that's what her name was…Scooter had only known her for a few minutes, but he was already thinking that they could be friends.

As Scooter ran out of Kermit's office, the cast from "Bella Bella" filed slowly offstage, and he could hear the Electric Mayhem already out on stage doing a number by Dire Straits. He handed Nora the receipt. "Here you go, let's make sure we're legal," he smiled sheepishly.

Nora took the receipt, scribbled a note on it and pocketed it. "Thanks," she said. "I guess I'd better be going now." She pushed the door open and found that the rain had pretty much turned into a typhoon-worthy deluge.

"How'd you get here?" Scooter asked.

"I rode my bike."

"I think you'd better wait here until it lets up. And we'd better bring your bike in." Scooter turned and went to grab his raincoat and boots. He and Nora ran (swam?) out into the torrents, which seemed even more like whole buckets of water pouring down. Nora unchained her bike, and Scooter helped her bring it through the alley and heft it up the steps and into the backstage area.

"So what do you do, Scooter?" Nora asked as they set her bike down next to the stairs leading up to the dressing rooms.

"Me? I gofer coffee, gofer sandwiches, better duck right now…"

"Huh?" Nora turned and quickly dove for cover as one of the Flying Zucchini Brothers went sailing overhead and smashed into one of the sets. Shards of plywood, canvas and Styrofoam flew everywhere.

"…I also tell the acts when it's time to get ready, and I help Kermit keep them in line," Scooter said, without missing a beat.

Nora smiled. "Would that be a straight line or a squiggly one?"

-------

Nora picked up the phone and punched in the number for Coming Unbound. "Boss? Listen, the rain's really bad, and it's not safe to bike in it now. The guys at the theater said I could hang around until the rain let up."

"Did they get the scripts?"

"Yes, boss."

"Fine, you were really hefting the hardcovers in the back room." Mrs. Farley rasped. "Besides, it's coming on near closing time, anyway."

Nora hung up and sat down to watch the proceedings while Scooter made the long-delayed phone call to Anya LaRusse, who said that she would be happy to appear on the show, just as long as she didn't have to share a dressing room with Miss Piggy.

-----

An hour later, the cast started to leave for the night. The Mayhem bus spat out a cloud of exhaust and roared off into the distance.

"Where do you live?" Scooter asked Nora.

"Over on the corner of Mullen and Prell, with my dad, grandmother, and three of four siblings."

"I'm up on Moss and Hunt, with my sister and our mom, aunt and uncle. Mind if I ride along?"

"Sure."

As Scooter and Nora started north, Richard, Dave and Jerry carried their rowing shell up the street, the flood having receded some time before.

"Good paddle, boys," Jerry said jovially. "We ought to do this again sometime."

"Yeah, we're supposed to get a nor'easter sometime in October, and the city hasn't fixed the storm drains yet." Richard took a deep breath and suddenly started hacking and coughing. "What's that smell?"

It was a foul, acrid, burning smell. The three men dropped the shell and ran two blocks east. What they saw made their eyes widen.

Fire spewed from the costume shop at the Jane Nebel Theater, destroying all the costumes that had been carefully made for the theater's upcoming tribute to Shakespeare. The scripts, sets and props were also lost, they would later learn.

The foul scents of smoke, ash and...dead fish hung in the air.

"Someone call Jim, Frank and Jane," Jerry said in a low voice.

The Killer Fish had struck again.

 

[ReneeLouvier]

OOH!!! Oh wow!! This is freaking AWESOME!!

 

[Muppet Newsgirl]

Stay tuned, Renee. Act two is coming up, and Nancy, J.P. and Sadie will all appear. I just need to edit some stuff.

 

[ReneeLouvier]

Oh my goodness....awesome!!! *squealing* YAYYY!!!!!!