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Dinner Date Disaster

The Count

Staff member
Jul 12, 2002
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Yeah, I know the baked goods were a rousse... Since Crazy Harry went into business with The Breadmaster, one of the Tick's nemeses.

Gots some ficshots I'd like to sit down and write, but more awesome longish fics and working on the write-ups for the characters for my realm of Numbervania takes up most of my "free" time. Especially when I have to depend on my brother being available once I find the character in question to ask him to describe said character's visual appearance to me. :sigh:

Talk to you tomorrow Gins.


Well-Known Member
Mar 26, 2012
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So I am on a roll this week! If you missed it, yes I have returned. And yes, for the Christmas season of 2019, Gina Claus has come barring gifts. You now all have a very long awaited update to Two Ball (go check it out) and I am now giving you an update to this little ficlet here. Next up, I'm hoping will be New York Minute, which has been sitting patiently for an update in like forever and a day.

And cause it's been so very long, obligatory summary for you:

Set within the Up Late universe and based on a combination of Designing Women episodes, Scooter Grosse signs up to be involved in a charity bachelor auction for a local tennis club, with Miss Piggy as his coach and mentor. While first excited, during the actual event, Scooter begins to get cold feet especially after seeing a talent manager who has been interested in him waving around a wad of cash, just waiting to buy him. To top it off, a 2 for 1 daquiri special has made most of those in attendance very tipsy and very forward.

In order to try and help, Kermit - with unexpected and unwanted help from Gonzo - try to save Scooter from the manager's grasp, but aren't willing to go higher than the $600 she's offering. Annoyed with the low purchase, Piggy blurts out that Scooter is worth $1000 dollars, ultimately winning a date with the redhead assistant. This however seems to set off Kermit's jealousy as he begins to rethink the interactions that Piggy and Scooter have had over the years. Heading over to the Tavern for counsel, Fozzie calls out Kermit's insecurity about losing Piggy again, while Gonzo mistakenly ends up giving Kermit the idea to spy on the two during their date.

We now pick up on that faithful night! Is Kermit right to worry? Are Piggy and Scooter closer than they seem? Is Gonzo right and they have taken a strange trip through the Twilight Zone?

Let's watch and see!

Friday night in Beverly Hills was much like any Friday night anywhere. Groups of people went downtown to hang out, have dinner, and even go dancing. Others stayed in, having game nights with friends and family. Scooter Grosse, assistant producer for Up Late with Miss Piggy found himself dressed in a dark suit, with a striped gray tie and standing on the porch of the home of said host.

Despite the circumstances of how this date came about, the two had agreed to none the less see it through. In fact, Scooter was almost sure Piggy was humoring him – she probably had to cancel plans with Kermit so she could fulfill her end of the bargain, which was why the page had tried to go out of his way to best nice to Kermit that week. Not that he wasn’t already nice to the frog anyway, but the red head wanted to make sure he knew that he absolutely appreciated that they had gone to bat for him.

Like they always had.

Despite the ‘date’ aspect of this, this was simply the same thing that he and Piggy would be doing any other day of the week. They routinely had lunch together and back in the old days, when he was the frog’s right hand man, the three of them used to have breakfast together at the house. Things of course had changed since the major break up of the group and their leaders, but it always amazed the red head that things could also stay the same as well.

When he had volunteered for this bachelor auction, of course he had gone to Piggy; who else would he have gone to? The diva had been equally surprised that the assistant producer would want to strut his stuff on a runway, but she had none the less not only backed his decision, but went all out the only way Piggy could.

Which had led to him standing on her doorstep.

Scooter didn’t have to wait long, the door opening to reveal his date dressed in a very nice and a very new black cocktail dress. While this may have looked like a date on paper, Piggy knew that this was just going to be dinner with someone she usually had some sort of meal with. It didn’t mean she wouldn’t dress for the occasion, but she also didn’t want to put on a ball gown when she was just entertaining in her own home. She had assumed Scooter would’ve done the same thing, so she couldn’t hide her surprise quick enough when she saw the suit ensemble he wore.

“Why Andrew,” she replied, giving him a once over. “Aren’t you a delightful sight on a Friday night?”

“Miss Piggy, gorgeous as ever,” was the reply. Handing over the lavender carnation he had picked for her, Scooter continued with, “And you know I always dress to impress, especially when a beautiful woman is involved.”

The diva smirked, leaning against the door to allow the page to enter. “Smooth, Grosse. Real smooth.”

Scooter bowed slightly at the compliment, the diva closing the door behind them as he passed to enter. “Thanks for actually going through with this,” he said, waiting for her to join him as they headed towards the kitchen. “You know you didn’t have to.”

“Of course Moi didn’t have to,” she retorted, taking his arm in hers. “Moi wanted to. And why in the world would I pass up the opportunity to have a home cooked meal with one of my favorite people?”

Scooter huffed good-naturedly. “Don’t let the frog hear you say that.”

“What he doesn’t know won’t hurt him.”

Unknown to the two inside, the frog was well aware of this so-called date because he was literally in a car parked across the street. After running off in crazed excitement, Kermit had managed to rope Gonzo, Rowlf, and Fozzie into coming with him on this, as Rowlf put it “extreme case of jealousy expedition”. In fact, as Fozzie had stated while they were leaving, they were doing this to try and keep Kermit out of prison or worse, out of trouble with Piggy once she realized what they were doing.

Kermit of course had waved off their concern and even his own, pushing the little voice in his head into a little cage to be ignored. What was possessing him on this lunacy, he didn’t know, but for some reason all of the lunches, breakfasts, and little side conversations he’d let Scooter and Piggy have together had somehow morphed into the two of them having some clandestine affair behind his back.

Out of everyone, the frog had always assumed Gonzo was his biggest rival for the pig’s affection, even if the weirdo went back and forth between being serious and just seriously toying with the frog’s sanity. It had never occurred to Kermit that whatever little crush Scooter may have had was legit, at least until now. His assistant producer wasn’t the gawky little teenager anymore – he had made a name for himself outside of the Muppets and he was becoming far surer and more confident than Kermit could remember.

Which could only explain why he’d want to be part of a bachelor auction.

Oh he knew this had been a big mistake. He’d even gone on to state that very fact, very publicly and why he didn’t listen to himself then, he would never know.

Those swirling thoughts had led him to this – sitting in Gonzo’s backseat across the street from Piggy’s house and staring through a pair of binoculars. The group had arrived shortly after Scooter had pulled into the driveway and had watched the display at the door. “Wow,” Fozzie gushed, seeing the dress Piggy wore as she opened the door to let the assistant through. “Piggy looks great!”

Gonzo of course had let out a low whistle of appreciation. “That’s a spicy number, alright,” he murmured. “Where is she keeping these things? Why is she hiding these from us?”

“She’s not hiding anything,” Kermit mumbled, trying to adjust his view from the backseat. “That’s a totally new dress that I didn’t even know about. And if she was hiding anything, I’m sure it would purely be from you.”

“Says the frog parked across the street from her house and spying on her through binoculars,” grumbled Gonzo. “How we haven’t been arrested yet, I don’t know.”

Removing the binoculars from his face, Kermit turned an annoyed look on Gonzo. “You’re the one who gave me the binoculars!” he spat. “And why do you have binoculars in your car anyways?”

“I told you,” Gonzo said, rolling his eyes. “Camilla and I go bird watching every weekend.”

“You can look at birds without binoculars.”

“Yeah,” the weirdo huffed. “And we could also be at home instead of stalking your girlfriend like crazy people. What universe is this where I’m the voice of reason!?”

“Well I can’t see anything from here,” Kermit announced. “We’re gonna have to get closer.”

“Excuse me!?” Gonzo exclaimed, watching as the frog opened the backdoor and proceeded to run across the street to the house. Whipping around to face the other occupants of the car, he asked, “Why are we not stopping this?”

“Well…” Fozzie said, shrugging timidly. “Isn’t it better that we’re with him so he doesn’t do anything crazy?” Both Gonzo and Rowlf looked at him. “I mean, anything else crazy.”

“Bear does have a point,” Rowlf nodded. And with that, both he and said bear got out of the car and quickly followed their frog across the street. Gonzo only had a moment to wonder what Twilight Zone he had entered before he also left the car, managing to catch up to the group as they made their way around the side of the house.

“Fine,” he huffed, once he reached the trio. “But if we get arrested or murdered, because Piggy will kill us, I’m not explaining this to Camilla. You three are.”

“Do you think we should climb in through a window?” Kermit asked, clearly unconcerned about any ramifications this little trip would have in the end, earning him an incredulous look from the weirdo.

“I never thought I would say this,” Gonzo murmured. “But I’m surrounded by lunatics.”

“Takes one to know one,” Rowlf quipped.

“Ha ha ha,” Gonzo retorted, sarcastically.

More to come later tonight hopefully!
Last edited:


Well-Known Member
Mar 26, 2012
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Hi-o! So, feeling a bit down today, so thought I'd pick myself up by doing an update over here. If you're just checking in - Thanks to Piggy's outrage, she managed to win a date with Scooter during a tennis club bachelor auction. Surprising to those around him, Kermit's jealousy goes off the rails when he insists that he, Gonzo, Rowlf, and Fozzie go spy on the couple, leading Gonzo to ask what universe they're in where he's the lone voice of reason.

We now take a peek inside Casa de la Piggy, where our diva is coming to a stunning realization...

The evening had been perfect, almost like any other meal Piggy would’ve taken with Scooter. Or rather, it should’ve been. Not that their talks over work, pop culture, entertainment, social media, and other things wasn’t their normal fare, but the diva had to admit there was some weird energy going on that she just couldn’t put her finger on.

Actually…no, she could put her finger on it and she knew almost immediately when it started – right as she opened the door and saw Scooter standing on the other side.

Never once, well almost never, had Piggy considered the red head as a viable candidate when it came to boyfriend material. Why would she? She was hopelessly devoted and head over heels and then some with Kermit and besides, Scooter was a child – well, teenager – and far too young to even be in the always waiting line of beaus who wanted to date her or take her out. The blonde was used to delivering and being on the receiving end of flirty banter and discrete innuendo, but she expected it from people like Kermit or Rowlf, Gonzo on a good day and Pepe on a bad one; she traded barbs all over Hollywood with some of the most handsome and available (and sometimes not available) men around.
Scooter Grosse had never been on that list.

Tonight, however, Andrew Grosse was on point and giving Miss Piggy a bit of a run for her money. While they had always joked around and were closer than they may have admitted, Piggy had never felt as though Scooter was…well…interested in her. Yes, there had been that one time when she realized that his teen libido had centered on her, but that had been a phase and one easily forgotten after about a month. So the diva was a little stunned when she began noticing just how much the page had grown.

And how he seemed far more confident than usual. And he did cut a dashing figure tonight.

The juxtaposition of little teenage Scooter with very adult Andrew was throwing her brain for a loop and more times than she would admit, her assistant producer had her blushing inside of her meal or wine glass. Piggy knew, instinctively and deep down, that this was purely a weird combination of things coming together to flip the switch on her. She knew there was nothing to this, this was just dinner; nothing more, nothing less.

But she would be lying if his boyish charm wasn’t rubbing off on her.

By the time they were in the middle of dessert, some romantic little number had pulled up on her playlist and she tried to still her heart when Scooter asked her to dance. It wasn’t even anything popular or even special, just some random love song that seemingly popped up on her radio suggestion, but suddenly being in Scooter’s arms seemed to flip the switch to potential thoughts that she was not going to entertain, brain, thank you very much.

“When’d you learn to become such a good dancer?” she asked, surprised at the flawless way the assistant seemed to be leading.

“Since someone, namely you, taught me to dance,” came the retort.

“Did I?”

Scooter nodded. “For my junior prom.”

Piggy thought about that night, seemingly remembering a very chaotic scene. “Oh yeah,” she murmured. “You went with that tall, gangly looking girl?”

“Patrice Marsten, yes,” replied the red head. “We stopped by the theater.”

“If Moi remembers correctly, that night did not end well.”

“Well,” Scooter shrugged. “I got my heart broken, but Patrice did get a punch in the face.”

Piggy shook her head in mirth. “You know,” she said. “We never did believe Janice when she said she was taking kick boxing lessons. Proved us wrong.” Giving the red head a look, Piggy draped her arms over his shoulders. “You tend to inspire a great deal of loyalty, Mr. Grosse.”

Pulling the pig closer, he murmured, “I’m a very loyal guy.”

Piggy surprised herself by actually gulping.

“Interesting segway, though strangely related,” he continued. “Gonzo’s been following me since I left the apartment and now he, Kermit, Fozzie, and Rowlf are looking at us through the patio doors.”

Piggy immediately turned, catching the four aforementioned Muppets indeed, standing on the patio and watching the two of them dance through the doors. Surprised at being caught, the four quickly made their escape. Turning back to her dance partner, she huffed, “Moi has no idea what that’s about and is not about to question it.”

“Really?” asked Scooter. “Cause that would seem to beg a host of questions.”

Piggy waved the thought away. “I’m sure they’re over here to make sure Moi isn’t taking advantage of you.”

Scooter nodded, though he did send a smile the diva’s way. “Or they could be making sure I’m not taking advantage of you.”

Piggy honestly wasn’t sure how to respond to that.


It was a lovely evening overall, even with the earlier weirdness of the boys standing outside on her patio and looking in. Piggy meant what she said – she had often questioned what it was that Kermit ended up doing with Fozzie and Gonzo and she usually had a pretty good idea what the frog and the dog got up to, but the four of them together should’ve been a very simple guys night out or something.

That should not have included her at all.

Oh, she was pretty sure they were checking up on her, her reputation did precede her after all, but Scooter’s quip had actually made her wonder if Kermit’s appearance meant he thought exactly that. It was silly, of course, why would Kermit have any issue with her spending time with Scooter, of all people? Yes, they had decided to give their relationship another try, a much much slower effort this time around, considering the disastrous turn that had previously happened. Piggy couldn’t lie – seeing Kermit with Denise had broken her something fierce, but she actually enjoyed the fact that she and Kermit were friends, something she couldn’t remember them ever being before. She liked this new dynamic of theirs and honestly, she had been a little hesitant on not only changing it but going back to what they had been before was…

Well, she didn’t want that at all.

If it meant she was a little love shy when it came to getting back together, then so be it. Piggy was the kind of gal who got what she wanted and then some, but much of that came with very careful consideration and she rarely gave careful consideration when it came to Kermit. Or vice versa for that matter. That had to be the reason why this sudden attention from Scooter was surprising, but flattering.

She and Scooter were friends and had been for quite some time. Uncle Deadly may be her assistant now and one of her closest confidants, but Scooter had been her first and was still one her most trusted friends. It certainly wasn’t out of the realm of possibility that couples hadn’t gotten together thanks to their former friendship, but there were also pitfalls to that, like when said couple broke up or, in her and Kermit’s case, split their friends right down the middle.

As much as she wanted to discount the very strange concept, Piggy couldn’t help but find that the energy in the room was still there, maybe more so now that they were sitting comfortably on the couch and finishing up their glasses of wine. They had been trading some insider stories from the bachelor auction, with Scooter admitting the appearance of Petersen had scared him senseless.

“You have no idea how happy I am that you bought me and not her,” the red head was saying.

“Well,” Piggy chuckled. “For a moment there, it looked like you might’ve been doing this with Gonzo or Kermit.”

“Well then,” smirked Scooter. “I’m just happy that my current company and scenery is you.”

She couldn’t count the amount of times her assistant producer had made her blush that night, adding another at his statement. “You’ve got all the lines tonight, Grosse.”

Scooter shrugged, though this time it was his turn to blush. “Yeah, well…” he whispered. “I don’t know if you were aware, but I used have a…major crush on you at one time. Well…various times.”

Piggy couldn’t say she was surprised, she actually was aware that the teen had harbored a crush at one point, but she wasn’t exactly sure what he had meant at various times. Surely, he meant when he was younger and not…now. In either case, the diva stumbled over her words as she tried to gather what to say in response.

“Moi was aware, yes,” she murmured. “And of course vous was sweet to even consider me in your wide circle of admiration…”

“Wasn’t that wide.”

“Hmmm, not how Moi remembers it,” she joked, taking a small sip from her glass. “Though…full disclosure…Moi would have certainly considered it, if you had been ten years older.”

“Well…” came the flirty response. “As you may have noticed, I’m not a teenager anymore.”

Piggy couldn’t stop her jaw from dropping slightly in surprise. “Scooter, are you flirting with me?”

Her date just smirked. “And here I thought you hadn’t noticed.”

“Moi has noticed,” she grinned. “On both accounts. My, my, Mr. Grosse, you do continue to impress me.”

“Miss Piggy, you’ll find that I am full of surprises.”

The diva gave a respectful nod. “I bet you are.”

“However,” he continued. “You and I both know that you’d be far more impressed – and interested – if I was green.”

Piggy chuckled. “Or if I was a red head.” And that was the leverage the pig had over the page, something that she was sure only she was aware of, at least for the moment.

That did cause Scooter laugh. “Touché,” he chuckled. He spared her another flirtatious glance. “Though, never let it be said there wasn’t a blonde I didn’t like.”

And just like that, the even footing that Piggy had managed to gain seemed to disappear in an instance. Even though both were fully aware that their hearts weren’t beating for each other, but other people, the possibility had been there as Piggy noted and certainly didn’t escape either’s notice that in some distance universe, this situation could’ve been a common reality.

The atmosphere was once again broken, this time by the pop song coming from Piggy’s phone in the kitchen. “That’s you,” Scooter stated, downing the rest of his glass. Piggy tried to leave in a dignified manner and not the rush that she ended up pulling off, heading towards her kitchen counter, where she had left her phone.

“Vote for Piggy.”

“Piggy Lee,” replied the voice. “This is Gonzo. I’m sitting outside with Rowlf, Fozzie, and your psycho boyfriend. We’re hot, tired, and hungry. Now whatever zaniness you and the boy are up to in there, please put a stop to it. The frog is driving us crazy and unless you want us to drive him to the nearest mental facility, you will have Scooter leave this instant, so we can get back to our normal lives and escape this bizarro world we seemed to be trapped in.

“Now we’re watching the window and we’re waiting for your signal. Goodbye.”

Across the street, as stated, Gonzo was sitting behind the wheel of his car, Kermit next to him in the passenger seat and Rowlf and Fozzie behind them in the back. The weirdo hadn’t lied – the other three were tired, Fozzie had been complaining for the last fifteen minutes that he was hungry, and Rowlf was becoming more and more restless being trapped in the car. Gonzo himself wanted to go home and forget this strange journey they got dragged into, especially when he seemed to be the lone voice of reason, which unnerved him more than anything else this night. While Gonzo could take things seriously when needed, he liked the ability to just let things happen or making things happen; this Twilight Zone night where Kermit the Frog had lost his mind and the bear and dog were cool about going along with it did not sit well with the stunt weirdo at all.

The best thing he could hope was that Piggy and Scooter would just stop what they were doing, the latter getting up and going home, and then kicking the frog out of his car so he and Piggy could work out whatever they didn’t to work out, he didn’t care, he was just done.

From their vantage point, they could easily see through the front window through the slightly opened blinds. They had seen the very close way those two had been dancing – which had been a struggle in getting Kermit back to the car, upon threat of punching him out – before they had headed to the couch with two glasses of wine. Where they had remained until Gonzo had called, waiting this whole affair to end.

Right the heck now.

As such, the four were able to see Piggy appear at the window, sending them a glare as she did, before she abruptly shut the blinds. “No, she didn’t,” came the expected protest next to him and then the pig went one further by dimming the lights, causing the frog to gasp in shock.

“Whelp,” Gonzo replied, turning from the scene and starting the car. “That’s it. Piggy’s dumped you for the boy. Time to go.”

“Wait, wait, Gonzo, we can’t leave! We…”

“Nope,” he interrupted. “I’m driving and I’m not listening to you anymore, which is what I should’ve done at the beginning of this whole thing.”

“Gonzo, can we go to Whataburger?” came Fozzie’s request.

“Yes. Yes, Fozzie, we can. In fact, that is probably the most sensible request we’ve had all evening.”

The Count

Staff member
Jul 12, 2002
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The summary definitely helped remind me what this fic's plot was meant to show, an unbelievable crazy Bizarro-world where Gonzo is the lone voice of reason. Or should that be Oznog from the Teppums (JHH reference) if we're in Bizarro-world? Anyway... Camilla would probably know where her weirdo's been, she'll grouse at him for going along with it (she's a chicken, that's a bird joke there), she'll eventually forgive him for being roped into the frog's delusions.

As for the others, :embarrassed: and :sympathy: shoulda stayed at The Tavern. They coulda listened about the failed stalking at their own comfort and leisure.
*Kicks back to keep reading whatever's posted next. :smile:


Well-Known Member
Mar 26, 2012
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Continuing on from the last bit, we have now concluded a Dinner Date Disaster! Now, was that so hard? (to self, no, obviously. I had things to do, dang it). What's up next,, WMG??

Well, my dudes and dudettes, we're gonna be finishing up 2-Ball and as Scarlet O'Hara as my witness, I WILL be finishing New York Minute by the very earliest of New Year's. Totes, seriously. Serial.

However, my focus - thanks to this piece - has shifted back onto that season 2 stuff I said I was gonna do. I honestly have no excuses to NOT finish the 2015, especially when I am paying for Disney+. It's on my list. I should be watching. That and the Mandalorian. Cause you know...baby Yoda. I'm sorry, I know I've lost your respect, but c'mon! He's adorable! Sipping his little tea and stuff. If we get a Muppet Babies version with baby Yoda in it, I will give all of my money to Disney, no question.

Back on track - so yeah, all that season 2 stuff is gonna happen. I have all 15 storisodes if you will, laid out, with plots and everything, so yes. I will write those. In fact, I feel like 2020 I'm just gonna devote to those, with some sides of Miss Piggy Adventures. And the conclusion to the Pool Hall series and of course, some Mondays on Mondays when we get a little bored.

Anyway, this was supposed to be a conclusion and it is! Roll it!

Back inside, Scooter had turned to watch as his host had quickly shut the blinds before turning the lights down low and returning to her seat. “What was that about?” he asked.

“Nothing,” she replied, quickly. Opening the coffee table drawer in front of her, she removed two game console controllers, handing one to Scooter before closing the drawer. “Wanted to set the mood for the rest of the night is all. Now, to go to work. Beating you down like the chump you are.”

Scooter huffed, watching as Piggy quickly powered on both the TV and the Console One that sat within the entertainment center underneath it. “You’re the chump,” he said. “I’m gonna slay you like a dragon.”

You’re gonna slay me?”

“Queen, I always slay,” came the rather sassy retort. “I’m Andy Westside.”


The drive to Whataburger and then towards Rowlf and Fozzie’s area of town was mostly quiet, though Kermit managed to get a few irritated huffs and annoyed grunts in as they drove. More than once Gonzo answered with his own sarcastic responses, which were equally starting to get on the nerves of the passengers in the back. The last huff was met with the very expected angered reply from the driver.

“Knock it off! I swear, Kermit, I will turn this car right back around and drop you off first if it means we can continue driving in silence!”

“You know what? I’m not talking to you.”

“Well, good! Fantastic! The last thing I wanna do is talk to you. In fact, you don’t have anyone to blame but yourself. Cause you know what – nothing says love like stalking your sorta kinda girlfriend when she’s on a date with someone else!”

“Gonzo, why would you say it like that?” Rowlf sighed, shaking his head. Not that he wasn’t equally annoyed at the frog, but he had hoped this would get out of his system once he saw nothing was apparently going on with the diva or the assistant producer. Of course, that was not what happened, in fact it only seemed to make the frog even more crazed than before.

Being the laid back kinda guy he was, Rowlf understood both side of the situation. He totally agreed with Fozzie when it came to Kermit – for every amount of confidence he seemed to allude when rounding them up, his insecurities always seemed to flare when it came to their resident diva. And vice versa; the dogtender had been counselor to both and while he would always be behind the two of them being together, he also took the approach that if being together didn’t make them happy, then they shouldn’t be together.

The problem of course was that being apart only made them worse.

“Look,” he tried. “Kermit’s clearly having a night…”

He’s having a night!?” the driver exclaimed. “We’re the ones he kidnapped!”

“You were not kidnapped,” Kermit huffed. “In fact, you’re the one driving! How is this my fault?”

“Are you kidding me!?” Gonzo jerked the wheel in his response, his head turning to look at the frog.

“Eyes on the road, Gonzo,” Fozzie stated, gripping both the seat and his bag of food in his hands.

“Kermit,” the weirdo stressed, taking a deep breath before he said his next words. “I love you. You are the brother I didn’t even know I wanted, but sometimes I want to strangle you. Let’s not go over the many years the three of us have watched you rake that pig over the coals. We won’t talk about that, nor will we state some of the things that Piggy has done to you.

“And I’m sure I speak for everyone when I say that we are more than happy, ecstatic even, that you and Piggy are gonna give this another try, for the millionth time. But I tell you what, Frog, nothing says ‘I love and trust you’ than sitting outside your girlfriend’s house and stalking her!

There was a beat before Fozzie helpfully piped up, “Technically Piggy isn’t his girlfriend yet.”

“Thank you for reminding me, Foz.”

Kermit sighed, arms crossed his chest. His jealousy and insecurities seemed have to dwindled since leaving the house, probably because he didn’t have to see Piggy and Scooter together. He honestly wasn’t sure what got into him, but he had to admit that Fozzie’s words earlier had probably pegged him right.

That trip to Thailand had been a fluke, a spontaneous attempt at trying to show that Kermit wasn’t a complete idiot and that he could recognize when something good had come into his life. And despite all of their arguments, Miss Piggy was the best thing that had happened to him. Ever. He knew what life was like without her, even when he saw her every day, it wasn’t the same knowing that he had hurt her as much as she had hurt him.

While Kermit had gone all in, even with the help of a coin flip, Piggy had been strangely reluctant to start up where they had left off; she liked that they were friends now, something that had been strongly absent when they had first been dating. And it wasn’t that Kermit didn’t like their friendship either, in fact he was glad they could even be friends after everything they had gone through. And Thailand had been such a great time, probably one of the only times they’d ever been on a vacation with just the two of them and…well, Kermit didn’t want that to change.

Even if it meant he’d stop anyone that could ruin that.

“I don’t think I could go through losing her again,” he murmured, his thoughts drifting along as the car went down the road.

“Well, if you keep up with the paranoid, jealous bit, you will,” Gonzo shot back, though his tone was less harsh than it had been.

“I think it goes without saying,” Rowlf whispered, patting the frog on the shoulder. “That you owe both the boy and her royal highness an apology. More than one, I’m sure.”

Kermit sighed again. “Yeah,” he nodded. “Yeah, Rowlfie, you’re right. As always.” Turning slightly in his seat, he addressed the others. “I’m sorry, you guys. I don’t where my mind is, well…obviously with and on Piggy, where it normally resides, I guess. And of course I’m an idiot. I just…” He gave a sheepish shrug. “I just really want this to work this time. Not sure how many more chances I’ll get.”

“You’re a jealous idiot,” Gonzo stated, throwing a look at him. “But you’re our jealous idiot. And like we’d let you mess this up again. Come on. We’ve had our groomsmen suits ready for years and I would like to use mine before I die, thank you very much.”


Saturday morning was usually a very normal and very quiet day on the Up Late set.

Is what no one said, ever.

Despite not having to work on the weekend, the Muppets still managed to find themselves on set doing something. The Electric Mayhem would usually come in to practice, or rather, do a jam session that could last all day or weekend (which had happened before); Gonzo, Rizzo, and Pepe would sometimes find an excuse to goof off in the office versus doing it at home, especially with Camilla there, where ‘goofing off’ meant something different between her and the weirdo; and Scooter and Kermit normally did their budgeting over the weekend.

Kermit was already in the studio, in his office to be precise, and checking every five minutes or so when he could tell or see Piggy and Scooter walk in. After a night of reflection, he was horrendously embarrassed by his behavior and was going to take Rowlf’s advice straight away. He was going to be the bigger frog in all of this; if Piggy wasn’t ready to start a relationship with him, well, that was on him. That didn’t mean she couldn’t start a relationship with anyone else, even if that anyone else was Scooter.

It would be weird, but it would certainly serve him right. After all, hadn’t he taken some perverse pleasure at knowing Piggy was stuck watching him and Denise? And unlike him, she had been a brick about everything, not only hiring him to work on her show, but helping him pick out a gift for Denise and then going along with their act when Robin had come into town. Piggy didn’t get the credit she deserved sometimes and Kermit was going to rectify that today.

Finally, after what seemed like hours and half of the day wasted, those two cohorts walked through the doors and down the hall, passing by his door and laughing at something he didn’t even want to guess at. Flinging the door, Kermit skidded out the doorway and behind them in the hall. “Hey guys.”

Both diva and assistant turned at the same time, smiling at seeing the frog. They planned on getting back at him for whatever craziness led to him being outside Piggy’s house with the others, though they would of course come clean. But that was later. For now, however…

“Hey Kermit,” Scooter replied. “What’s up?”

“Nothing much,” came the response. “How was uh…how was your…” Saying the word ‘date’ seemed to stick in his throat, so Kermit cleared it before going with, “How was last night?”

Scooter and Piggy looked at each other, seeing the opening they needed. They weren’t going to do too much damage to the frog’s ego, but they did want to needle him at least a little bit in the spirit of their normal tom-foolery. “Oh, it was great,” the red head said. “Actually, it went rather long. I was just walking Miss Piggy to her dressing room. Figured she should probably take a nap.”

Piggy huffed. “More like you,” she said. “Moi seems to remember you could barely keep up with me.”

Kermit stamped down the ready comment he knew was waiting to come out of his mouth. He wanted Piggy to be happy and if Scooter made her happy, then he was going to keep his mouth shut. He trusted Piggy and Scooter and he had already given into temptation by showing that he couldn’t talk the talk, as it were. “I…you know…” he stumbled. “You know what? I’m just gonna say it – I’m glad to hear it. And…I’m happy for you guys.”


This…was not what either Piggy or Scooter was expecting.

“And,” he continued. “I owe you both an apology. More than one, I’m sure, but let’s just start off with the first one. I’m sorry. I truly am. I love you, both of you, and I couldn’t exactly call myself your friend if I didn’t want to see to your happiness. And I trust you, you gotta know that. What happened with me last night was a one time thing, a complete fluke, and it will never happen again.”

Again, Scooter and Piggy looked at each other, this time in confusion, before turning back to the frog. What in the world was he talking about?

“What’re you talking about?” asked Piggy.

“Kermit, are you dying?” questioned Scooter.

“What?” Kermit asked, giving Scooter a look. Where did he get that from? “No. No, why would you…? Nevermind. And I’m talking, Piggy, about the two of you. I am happy for you. If there were two people better suited for each other…”

“Whoa, whoa!”


“Kermit, why in the world would you think I would want to date Piggy!?”

“’Cuse you,” the diva said, turning an annoyed look to her left. “Last night, you were all up in arms about not being able to date me.”

“Slow your roll, Hoss,” came the retort. “That is not what I said.”

“The point,” Kermit interrupted, frantically. The scene was much too close to a typical argument he’d might have with the diva and that would just drive another nail into the coffin. “Is that I am happy for the two of you. And I wish you all the happiness in the world.”

“Boss, you have some strange ideas about what Piggy and I do together.”

“Please say more.”

That was Kermit’s typical response whenever either one of those were about to tell him something that only they would discuss. Some of their discussions bordered on a very high level of TMI and knowing that the two of them were…that was the last thing he wanted to hear. And it must’ve shown because Piggy heard the distinct hitch in his voice when he said it.

“Oh my…Scooter, please just tell him!”

“Kermit, I…” Scooter started, but he drifted off when he caught sight of something from behind the frog. “Oh hey, you’re early.”

“Yeah,” replied a voice coming from Kermit’s right side. “I finished up, so I thought I’d come by to take you to lunch. Hey Miss Piggy.”

Kermit watched as a young, lightly orange Whatnot passed him. She had long red hair, a bit darker than Scooter’s own, tied up in a ponytail, wearing black slacks and a green silk blouse that matched the same colored eyes. Her appearance was already surprising, but what made Kermit’s eyes widen and his mouth to slightly drop was her walking over to his assistant producer and greeting him with a kiss.

Sensing the strange vibe that she had walked into, the auburn haired woman asked, “Am I interrupting something?”


“Thank god!”

“And thank you,” Piggy added. “From the bottom of our hearts and souls. Hello, dearheart.”

“Oh, uh,” Scooter stuttered. “Mandy, I don’t think you’ve met Kermit yet. Kermit, Amanda Cosgrove. Mandy, Kermit the Frog.”

“It’s a pleasure, Mr. The Frog,” Amanda replied, sending a smile towards the frog. “I’m like your biggest fan.”


“Kermit, you okay?” the Whatnot asked. “You’re looking a little green there.”

Everyone, but said green frog, got the joke and chuckled at it. “Oh, he’s fine,” Piggy said. “Some truth bombs were just dropped on him and he’s a little ‘shell-shocked’ as it were. Don’t worry, Moi will take care of him.”

“I bet you will,” Scooter retorted. That got him a playful slap on the arm.

“Don’t be crass,” Piggy said, though she sent a smirk towards him. “Amanda, dear, were you able to get those reservations?”

“I was,” Amanda replied. “Thank you so for the recommendation. In fact, that’s why I showed up early. Hoping we could make those before we get thrown off the list or something.”

“If you do, call me and Moi will get you back on it.” Piggy then made a shooing motion, pushing on Scooter’s shoulder to get him moving. “So, go on. Mon Capitaine, you don’t mind if these two lovebirds go to lunch a little early, do you?”


“Nah, he doesn’t mind,” the diva interpreted. “Go on, go, go, go! Andrew, please return within the hour or so, then you and Kermit can do whatever it is the two of you do on a Saturday.”

“Wouldn’t you like to know?”

“No,” she retorted. “Ew, gross.” She watched them walk down the hall before throwing out, “And don’t come home late! You know how Kermit worries!”

Turning her attention back to the frog, Piggy watched as he went back between watching Scooter leave and to where he had stood before turning to look at her. “What just happened?”

Placing her hands on his shoulders, she calmly replied, “Well, you just met Amanda, who is Scooter’s girlfriend.”

“Scooter’s what now?”

“Girlfriend, dearest,” she repeated. “Which of course throws out this silly notion that you now have that Scooter and I are somehow involved. Which is interesting, because Moi thought we were involved. Where is your head right now?”

“I don’t know,” Kermit said, truthfully. “I’m not even sure what day it is at the moment.”

“Is that what last night was about?” she asked. While she had entertained the notion, Piggy never once actually believed that her frog was actually jealous of Scooter.

Kermit sighed, shaking his head. “Rarely am I the one who’s gung ho about starting something up between us, purely my fault, I know,” he added when Piggy gave him a look. “I did everything wrong and managed to push you away. I just don’t want to swing in the opposite direction and…push you into the arms of someone else.”

“And that someone else being Scooter?”

“Someone else being anyone,” he countered. “But definitely Scooter. Or Rowlf or Gonzo, the last two barely deciding they’d start talking to me again.”

“And Fozzie?” she asked.

“Oh, I gave him a muffin this morning. We’re best friends again.”

Piggy shook her head. “I don’t know what to do with you sometimes.”

“That makes two of us.”

“And it’s take gonna take more than a muffin to make this up to me.”

“Oh absolutely!” Kermit said, nodding quickly. He then shyly asked, “Dinner?”

“Just dinner?”

She just couldn’t let him have that, could she? Instead, he hedged his bet a little. “And a movie?”

“What movie?”

“Vous pick.”

“Really?” Piggy asked, a huge smile on her face. “You’re gonna let Moi pick the movie?”

“I’m gonna regret it, but yeah.”

“Aw, Kermie,” she cooed. “Moi’s gonna pick the worst movie ever.”

“I know you will.”

“In fact,” she said, taking a step back. “Moi is gonna call Gonzo and let him recommend a movie.” Piggy started to head off down the hall towards her dressing room, smiling all the way.

“Oh good! That’s exactly what he wants,” Kermit shouted after her.


“We’ll both get to suffer.”

“Better vous than Moi,” she called back, hiding a laugh. She was halfway down the hall when Kermit called after her, causing her to turn around.

“Hey Piggy?”


“I love you.”

It was the first time he’d said since their trip to Thailand and definitely the first time, ever, while in the middle of a semi-busy studio, and while in earshot of anyone around. Kermit had been tight fisted with the deeper emotions Piggy managed to bring out in him, holding them close to his heart, but that had been part of their downfall and he didn’t want a repeat of it.

Such an odd occurrence had Piggy stop in her tracks. She could give a flippant remark, a quip, or something even flirty, but that would be backsliding in their past. The fact that Kermit had been so nearly convinced – and still was apparently – that they would repeat their old familiar patterns actual did not put her off; if anything, she was probably the only other person who understood where that fear was coming from.

Because she had it too.

And while she did love him – always had, always would – she wasn’t totally there yet in saying it back him unless on pain of death. Not that she never would again, but those were words that had meaning and when Kermit was willing to say them, loudly, in a hallway full of people, she knew she couldn’t just blow him off.

“I know,” she replied, seriously, and looking straight at him. Kermit knew her well enough, or should have at that point, that this was as close as he was going to get for the moment; the feelings were mutual, of course, but if they were going to make this work, the meaning and the reason for saying it was because they actually, truly, madly, and deeply felt it.


“Seven-thirty,” Piggy said, turning back around on her course. “Don’t be late.”

And I'm gonna end it there. And that's it people! We is done here! Counters, if you should ever, at any point update that long list of fics, I has like a thousand that need to be added. And obviously there will be a new series upcoming. Hope everyone enjoyed and next up, will hopefully be the conclusion of 2-Ball!
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The Count

Staff member
Jul 12, 2002
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Trust me, if I ever update that library list thing, it'll be a new thread most likely. And I'll have to contact you for how to reshelve your Up Late universe stuff.

But as for the Triple D, a really nice ending what with the apologies and final reveal. Mandy? For a moment I thought it was someone else, but you get bonus points for the crossover. Good to see how the frog and pig are handling the relationship, frankly this feels more genuine and how it should have been done in the first place.

Thanks for posting. :wink: :smile:


Well-Known Member
Mar 26, 2012
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Trust me, if I ever update that library list thing, it'll be a new thread most likely. And I'll have to contact you for how to reshelve your Up Late universe stuff.
Yeah, I know we talked...eons ago about the Up Late stuff, especially when it started crossing over into some of the established stuff, so may just create a new Up Late series for just the season 2 stuff and leave it at that. *shrug* Or something.

But as for the Triple D, a really nice ending what with the apologies and final reveal. Mandy? For a moment I thought it was someone else, but you get bonus points for the crossover. Good to see how the frog and pig are handling the relationship, frankly this feels more genuine and how it should have been done in the first place.

Thanks for posting. :wink: :smile:
Oh good. I went back and like, literally read through all of the one shots, established series, and everything of mine just to remember how to get back in the swing of things. I feel like I could take on the season 2 without finishing the 2015 show, but you know I'm a stickler for the research and it be one thing if I didn't have access, but I do, so no excuses for it. Just need to find the time to actually watch, among the other things I need to watch on everything else.

BUT...I may have a one shot for you later on; while I created a season 2, I also have some tidbits on a season 3, though only a few with actual titles. May throw the start of one into one shots.