Here's Chapter 3. if you feel I'm going too fast in posting these feel free to tell me so:
“Here you go folks, the garage and rest stop,” Fozzie announced loudly over the bus’s intercom as he swung wide to the left toward the garage. The snowstorm had meant that it had taken him fifteen minutes to drive the five miles there.
“This is a garage?” Alan stared in surprise out the window. What stood before them was a low, run-down stone building with broken windows on the garage doors and a sagging roof. A busted sign labeled DUMPEE CONVIENT STORE AND GARAGE hung dangerously to one side over the squat convenient store stuck on to the building’s right side.
“I know it’s not pretty to look at, but a couple of friends of mine run it,” Kermit leaned over the back of the seat directly in front of his special passenger, “It was the best they could get with lease offers so high these days. But they’ll take good care of your car, you can trust me on that. Fozzie, pull up here.”
“Aye aye Captain Kermit,” Fozzie braked the bus to an abrupt stop alongside the convenient store, sending everyone on board jerking forward in their seats. In the back row, Rizzo, who’d been giving Zachary his latest autograph, was pitched hard forward on the entire length of the bus, slamming hard into the rearview mirror. “Hey, I said warn us when you’re going to do that!” he complained to Fozzie as he slid downward to the floor.
“Oh rats, I know I forgot something,” Fozzie grumbled.
“I heard that!” Rizzo shouted at him.
Excuse us please,” Alan lifted Rizzo up off the floor as he walked down the steps after Kermit. The frog led him toward the reception area of the garage building. On the dusty desk was a small metal bell next to the sign RING FOR PROMPT SERVICE. Kermit ring the bell, which despite its size tolled away like a large church bell. Immediately George popped up behind the counter. Thanks for deciding to be Dumpee,” he announced, “How can we help you?”
“Well George, Mr. Reiser’s car broke down a few miles back, we’re wondering if you could take a look at it,” Kermit told him.
“You got it, frog, we’ll put it under our Insta-Check Ultraviolet Scanner,” George gestured to a strange contraption in the back of the garage. “Bruno, bring her in,” he called to the large lumbering trash man in the room behind him. Bruno nodded and silently lumbered out toward the Reiser’s car at the back of the bus. “I’d like to thank you for doing this for us,” Alan told Kermit as they walked back outside.
“Well Christmas is the time you help others the most,” Kermit said, “And since they work quick here, I…watch out Scooter!”
For the Dry Bandits’ truck had come into the parking lot from the other direction and had nearly run over Scooter, who’d been walking across the lot toward the convenient store. Larry rolled down the driver’s side window. “Hey, you’d better watch where you’re goin’, bud!” he shouted at Scooter from the snowdrift he’d been forced to dive into.
“Hey, which kettle are you calling black, Pot?” Fozzie yelled out his own window at the crook.
Chuck’s head snaked out Larry’s open window. “Watch yourself, coz,” he growled softly at Fozzie, “We pots can sizzle your kettle.”
“Right,” Fozzie gulped nervously at the sight of the other bear. Kermit gulped himself at the sight of the Riverbottom Gang climbing down out of the truck. “Not these guys again!” he lamented, sliding quickly behind Alan and grabbing hold of his scarf with both flippers, “Uh, don’t let them see me; they’ve been on me since my uncle helped out some people they wanted to see in the gutter.”
Larry climbed down from the truck as well. “Here,” he said, tossing Bo the gas pump, “Do something useful for a change, gas up while I go the bathroom. And don’t screw around with the hose.”
“We’ll go check out the shelves in the store,” the Snake told him, “Chuck’s hungry.”
“No, I’m not hungry,” Chuck corrected him, “I’m HUUUUNNNNNNGGGRRYYYYYYYY!”
“Sure thing, Chuck,” the Snake gulped. The five animals—the Weasel carrying the Pop-Eyed Catfish in its bucket—dashed for the store. “What’re you looking at?” Chuck growled threateningly at Alan as he past him. “Nice guy, very nice guy,” he told Kermit as the frog helped Scooter to his feet.
“Yeah, you’re telling me,” Fozzie remarked out the window, “He’s my cousin. He’s the black bear of the family.”
“He looks like a brown bear to me, Foz,” Scooter told him.
“No, no, no,” Fozzie shook his head, “I mean, we disowned him after he started doing terrible things.”
“Really, I can’t blame you,” Scooter stared inside the convenient store, which the Riverbottom Gang was basically tearing apart, throwing items up in the air at will. The cashier could be clearly seen screaming that she was going to call the police if they didn’t stop. It was at this moment when George stuck his head out the garage door. “Our inspection’s done,” he called out.
“Well that was quick service,” Alan remarked to Kermit as they headed back for the garage.
“Like I said, they do good business even if business is slow,” the frog said, “What’s wrong with it, George?”
“In a nutshell, everything,” George checked the checklist Bruno had handed to him, “The engine’s shot to pieces, the suspension’s busted, the brakes are long gone, it needs a rear end job, the oil’s overdue for a change, the gas lines are shot, and the tires need replacing.”
“How much is that going to cost?” Alan gulped, knowing they would have the funds for that extreme an overhaul.”
“Five bucks,” George said.
“Huh?”
“It’s Bargain Week; we’re offering a five dollars for five or more problems special,” George explained, “Bruno and I’ll have it all done on Boxing Day; we’ll have to, because then the boxers are all coming to have their cars done. You’ll still have to fill out the paperwork now.”
“That’s fine,” Alan reached for the clipboard. He and Kermit were too preoccupied to notice the police cruiser pulling slowly into the parking lot. Larry, fresh out of the bathroom, did however. He turned pale as the officer driving it trudged through the heavy snow toward the bathroom he’d just come out of. “Good afternoon, officer,” he told the man as politely as he could. One the cop was out of sight, he ran to the front door and waved frantically for the Riverbottom Gang to stop and leave. “Forget it, forget it, let’s get out of here!” he hissed at Bo, who was still filling up the truck. Bo hastily screwed the tank cap back on and jumped into the driver’s seat as the Riverbottomers scrambled over his partner. He gunned the truck’s engine and lurched it hard forward, hitting the gas pumps’ cement rise like a speed bump as he did. “That’s great Bo,” Larry derided him, “Why don’t you go faster and put me through the windshield while you’re at it?” Neither they nor the Riverbottom Gang noticed that the package containing the Baseball Diamond had flown out the open back of the truck from the bump and had fallen among the myriad of presents on the flatbed attached to Fozzie’s bus. Within moments, the thieves had disappeared into the storm again without their cargo. No one on board the bus seemed to have noticed the incident as well. Back at the garage, Alan shook George’s hand. “Well, I’d like to thank you for being so generous, and we’ll try and be back early on Boxing Day to pick it up,” he told the old man.
“Try and be early; I’ve got a nine thirty with Evander Holyfield,” George told him in closing. He trudged back toward the garage, when Bruno was already preparing a load of diagnostic equipment. “It’s all in good hands now,” Kermit reassured his friend, “Let’s go on to Fozzie’s mother’s place.”
“It looks like the snow’s starting to slow up a bit,” Zachary glanced out the window. He and his sister were now sitting alongside their father as the bus plowed it way through heavy drifts along a quiet country road.
“That’s what the latest weather reports said,” Zoot said from the other side of the aisle, “It’s going to come in three distinct waves. This was the first one.”
“Well, at least we won’t have to worry about traveling after this,” Kermit remarked, “And really, snow on Christmas makes the holiday a little more beautiful, a little more like it really should be.”
He glanced out at the winter wonderland before them. “There’s magic in the air this evening, magic in the air,” he started singing along with the song now playing on the bus’s radio, “The world is at her best, you know, when people love and care. The promise of excitement is one the night will keep. After all, there’s only one more sleep till Christmas.”
“Look out there, Daddy,” Christine pointed. All sorts of forest animals had come out of the woods and were running alongside the bus, including several penguins and polar bears. “Yep, we’re definitely getting closer now,” Kermit said, waving hello to several squirrels in the trees. He turned to his nephew next to him. “You take the next verse, Robin.”
“The world has got a smile today, the world has got a glow,” Robin sang with the song, “There’s no such thing as strangers when a stranger says ‘Hello.’ And everyone is family, we’re having so much fun, after all, there’s only one more sleep till Christmas.”
“Tis the season to be jolly and joyous,” every Muppet on the bus sang the bridge, “With a burst of pleasure we feel it all right. It’s a season when the Saints can employ us to spread the news about peace, and to keep love alive.”
“Your turn,” Kermit told Alan. The man shook his head. “I, uh, really don’t sing Christmas carols much anymore, Kermit,” he told the frog. Kermit shrugged. “There’s something in the wind today that’s good for everyone,” he went on with the song, “Yes, faith is in our hearts today, we’re shining like the sun. And everyone can feel it, the feeling’s running deep. After all, there’s only one more sleep till Christmas.”
“After all, there’s only one more sleep till Christmas Day,” every other Muppet finished the song.
“There it is, Mom’s old house,” Fozzie pointed through the snowflakes toward the distance, “And I see the minor modifications are coming along well.”
“Minor modifications?” Alan gaped at the old farmhouse just now visible…and the ten-story hotel façade that was being constructed behind it. A large blue form wearing a bright red suit was standing in the road in front of them. It knocked on the front window as Fozzie pulled up. “You’ve got your parking pass?” he asked Fozzie once the bear had rolled down the window.
“Right here, Thog,” Fozzie handed the form to the large blue creature. Thog gave it a looking over. “Spot 8-J on your right, in front of the barn,” he gestured the bus forward.
“You’ve got him out there in this weather?” Zachary had to ask Kermit.
“Well, with all the people we’ve got coming, I figured we might have to coordinate parking,” Kermit explained, “And who better to bear a storm than Thog, we figured. OK everyone,” he announced once the bus had slid to a stop in its parking space, “Make sure you’ve got your room reservation passes and luggage with you, because I don’t think with this weather we’re going to get back out here again.”
The various Muppets on board rose up and pulled their gear out of the bus’s overhead racks. Alan pulled Gonzo aside as the whatever walked toward the door. “Seriously, do you know how much they’re calling for?” he asked him, gesturing at the sky.
“I’ve heard about two feet, Mr. Reiser,” Gonzo told him, “If you’re hoping to get to the airport, I think….”
A large wooden plank abruptly fell out of nowhere onto his skull. “I think I’m in an extraordinarily large amount of pain,” Gonzo revised his sentence as he keeled forward. “Sorry,” came Biff’s voice from the scaffolding surrounding the hotel façade rising above them. “Sully, I thought I said to be careful with those planks!” he yelled at his associate. Sully shrugged and went back about his work. Back below, Alan helped Gonzo to his feet, handing him a large chuck of ice from nearby to put on his head, then walked back to the flatbed where his children were helping Rowlf unload the presents. “I don’t know how we’re going to keep track of which ones are ours, Daddy,” Christine told him, staring in confusion at the sheer number of presents before them.
“Well, Dr Honeydew’s Present X-Ray machine should help if we need to know,” Rowlf told her, handing her father several presents, including the one the Baseball Diamond was in, “If he ever got it to work, that is.”
“Look, here comes another bus,” Zachary pointed. Thog was gesturing another, more formal-looking bus, toward where they were parking. The letters on the side read SESAME STREET TOURS. “Hey, look who’s here!” Alan pointed Christine’s gaze toward the door after it had opened and the first person onboard had starting stepping off, “It’s Nurse Robinson!”
“Hello there Christine,” Susan strode over with a big smile and hugged her young patient, “How’ve we been since the last time you came to the hospital?”
“I’ve been great, Nurse Robinson,” Christine told her happily, “I’ve been taking the medication you said I should. Did Kermit invite you here?”
“Yep, he invited us all,” Gordon hunched low behind his wife, “Stay close, Miles, you could get separated easily in a storm like this.”
His son nodded, clutching his hand. Various other human residents of Sesame Street piled off the bus, suitcases in hand. Last off was a familiar old man in a gray hat. He walked over to the luggage bins and opened one up. “After you, please,” he gestured at Linda, who removed a carrying case with Barkley inside. “Did you enjoy your ride, Sprocket?” he told his own dog, unlocking his carrier and letting him out into the snow, “I wish you could have sat with me too, but this bus has certain rules.”
Sprocket whimpered in discomfort and stretched. “Yes, I would have preferred we’d driven here too, but there’s no way we could have made it through this mess in my car,” Doc tried to reason with his pet, “Besides, if these people offered you a free ride, would you turn it down?”
“Mr. Crystal, nice to see you again,” Alan shook Doc’s hand, “You know, you still owe me that refund for that malfunctioning sheep counter.”
“I know, I know,” Doc groaned in disgust, “Business has been slow for me too, Mr. Reiser. These times are hard an anyone, especially inventors like me.”
“Well, in the meantime, help us carry some of these presents,” Alan handed several to the inventor. He walked up toward the farmhouse door, only to slip hard as he approached it and fall flat on his back, dropping presents everywhere. “Careful on the icy patch!” shouted a familiar voice behind the door. It was abruptly thrown open. “Oh Kermit my love, I was so worried you wouldn’t make it!” Miss Piggy gushed, rushing to the frog and trying to embrace him.
“Yeah, uh, we made it, Piggy, now, uh, can we wait until everyone’s inside before…” Kermit slipped on the ice himself in his attempts to get away from Miss Piggy. “Careful on the icy patch!” another female voice warned. A bear with white hair stepped forward. “Ma!” Fozzie rushed forward over the still fallen Alan toward his mother—and also slipped. “Careful on the icy patch!” Statler and Waldorf shouted from the living room sofa. “This is going to be fun, watching this gag play out again,” the former told the latter.
“And now there’ll be more people to see do it,” Waldorf added, watching every single human and Muppet that walked into the house slip and fall on the ice one at a time. “Emily, say hello to the Reiser family,” Kermit introduced them to the older bear, “They’ll be staying here with us until this storm blows over. We do have available rooms, don’t we?”
“Probably,” Emily started glancing through the list in her hands, “but it would have to be one of the upper floors, and I don’t know…”
The doorbell rang behind them, followed by the sound of a very heavy person slipping on the ice. “Careful on the icy patch!” everyone nearby shouted out at them. Gonzo opened the door. “You OK, Earl?” he asked the heavily bundled up megalosaurus lying in a heap on the doorstep.
“As OK as a guy not used to this weather can be,” Earl Sinclair slowly rose up, rubbing his head, “Why couldn’t we have done this in Palm Springs?”
He and his family sauntered inside, all bundled up like there was no tomorrow. A somewhat worried Roy Hess brought up the rear. “I’m telling you, pally boy, there’s something that doesn’t seem right here, renting from mammals in cold weather,” he told Earl, “You know I’m allergic to cold weather.”
He sneezed loudly. Earl paid no attention to his friend and dropped the rest of his luggage in the middle of the den with a loud thump. “Well, advanced humans,” he noticed the Reisers, “There seems to be more of them out there these days than you can imagine.”
“I’m sure the feeling is mutual,” Alan told him. He noticed the Baby in Earl’s arms. “Hello there,” he said, making a false cute face, “My name’s…”
“Not the momma!” the Baby conked him over the head with its own heavy suitcase. Alan groaned and staggered backwards. “Now Baby, we agreed no hitting other guests,” Fran scolded it. She hailed down Sam the Eagle as he walked by. “Would you mind keeping an eye on him for a while?” she asked the bird, “I’m part of the cooking staff for today.”
“Me? Handling an infant?” Sam grimaced at the baby in distaste. “Hello, fat boy!” it greeted him. Sam stifled a heavy groan. “You there,” he remarked, noticing the Electric Mayhem wheeling in their equipment, “Where do you weirdoes think you're taking that paraphernalia?”
“We gotta get set up, man,” Dr. Teeth told the Eagle, “We’re gonna be playin’ all night long, right Clifford?”
“Absolutely,” the Rastafarian was placing several loudspeakers into place in the vestibule.
“Will your songs be of high cultural quality?” Sam had to know.
“Who cares?” the Baby shouted at him, “Gimme bottle!”
“Oh dear Lord,” Sam put an embarrassed wing over his face as he slowly shuffled off toward the kitchen. As he pushed open the door, Kermit exited carrying an icepack. “Here you are,” he said, handing it to Alan, “Sorry about that; he hits me every time I see him too.”
“I could guess,” Alan pressed it against his skull, “So you do have some place for us to stay here? I can see it is getting a bit crowded in here.”
“Let’s take a look here,” Kermit hefted Emily’s assignment book, “Ah yeah, it looks like the top floor in fact, so I hope you’re not afraid of elevators. Why don’t we take your stuff up now?"
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