Part 2, or Yeah, Yeah, the ZootyCutie Posted
The few Muppets that were backstage were glad that David had arrived. Zoot was the happiest of the bunch, due to the fact, like Dimentio, he was a Bowie fan too.
“The Bowie is here!” The sax player happily said, and started groveling at his feet.
“We're leaving!” Floyd, the bassist of the band said, and dragged Zoot by the collar of his shirt.
“No! Wait! Don't go!” Kermit called, but his efforts were fruitless. “Great, now we have our guest star, but no band!”
”Well, there's always coolPARODIES—“David suggested. “No, not them. Their bassist hates me...”
”We don't have much of a choice unless the Electric Mayhem comes back.” Kermit said.
” Okay, here's their number.” David said, as he wrote down their number. “Their keyboardist is a huge Muppet fan, so that might help things.”
Pretty soon, Kikit, the band’s tambourinest ended up leaping, and accidentally landing on Kermit, while they both ended up landing in a heap.
“Hi Kermit!” Kikit greeted him. “Sorry about that. Have you seen Zoot? I can't find him anywhere!”
“Floyd dragged him off somewhere because he was groveling at David Bowie's feet.” Kermit told the vegetarian sport player.
Pretty soon, Web the Swallow, a Muppet reporter, who was a swallow, appeared.
“Hey, did I hear something about washed-up celebrities?” She asked.
“Washed-up?” David fumed.
“Kermit, you gotta tell me where Floyd took Zoot!” Kikit said. “The opening number's almost on, plus if I don't find Zoot, I can't have that date with him!”
“Like, Kermit, was there rully supposed to be those nets propped up on the ceiling?” Janice, the band’s lead guitarist asked.
“Nets? Sheesh...” Kermit said, with shock and annoyance. “Kikit, I have no idea where they went. Sorry about all this, David.”
“Oh, it's okay.” David calmly replied. “Reminds me of when I was working on Labyrinth.”
After that, David headed up to his dressing room.
“Then I have a quest!” Kikit said, as she put a helmet on that looked a lot like 9-Volt’s “See ya!”
”Wait!” Janice called out. “Like, I rully should go make sure she doesn't destroy something.”
Janice then left to follow Kikit, and make sure that the theater stays intact.
“I don't think you have to worry about a thing!” A mysterious voice said.
That voice was Dimentio, with Zoot and Floyd with him!
”Someone lose a pair of musicians?” The jester asked.
“We only left to get some Christmas cookies and stuff like that.” Floyd explained, with a smile.
”Okay, now where's David Bowie?” Dimentio asked. “You said he'd be here.”
“ZOOOOOOOOOT!” Kikit excitedly rejoiced the return of her lover by glomping him.
” Well, David is-“Kermit attempted to get out.
”Electric Mayhem on stage for the opening number!” Scooter called out, interrupting Kermit.
”Okay, Electric Mayhem! You're on!” Kermit called, with relief on not having to talk to Dimentio about David.
The band then left to the stage, with Kermit following them, leaving Dimentio at a loss for words.
“'Scuse me, are you famous?” Web asked, poking Dimentio. “If you are, can I have an interview for my magazine?”
“No, I don't do interviews.” Dimentio said, with a hint of annoyance in his voice. “Go away.”
Kermit was now onstage, with the band behind the curtains, waiting for the cue.
“Hello, hello! Welcome to The Muppet Show!” Kermit happily said, seeming to forget about Dimentio. “Tonight's our Christmas special, with our very special guest star, David Bowie! But first, we have The Electric Mayhem with 'Zat You, Santa Clause. YAAAAAY!”
The curtains soon opened, revealing the band. Dr. Teeth was on vocals for the entire song.
“Gifts I'm preparin'
For some Christmas sharin'
But I pause because
Hangin' my stockin'
I can hear a knockin'
'Zat you, Santa Claus
Sure is dark out
Not the slighest spark out
Pardon my clackin' jaws
Uh, who there
Who is it
Uh, stoppin' for a visit
'Zat you, Santa Claus
Are you bringin' a present for me
Something pleasantly pleasant for me
That's what I've been waitin' for
Would you mind slippin' it under the door
Four winds are howlin'
Or maybe that be growlin'
My legs feel like straws
Oh my, my, me, my
Kindly would you reply
'Zat you, Santa Claus
Yeah
Oh hangin' my stockin'
I can hear a knockin'
'Zat you, Santa Claus
Yeah, say now
Hey there, who is it
Stoppin' for a visit
'Zat you, Santa Claus
Whoa there Santa you gave me a scare
Now stop teasin' 'cause I know you're there
We don't believe in no goblins today
But I can't explain why I'm shakin' this way
Well I see old Santa in the keyhole
I'll give to the cause
One peek and I'll try there
Uh-oh there's an eye there
'Zat you, Santa Claus
Please, please
I pity my knees
Say that's you Santa Claus
Most Poselutely!”
The audience loved the jamming tune, and the song ended with an uproar of applause. Well, except for two people…
“So Waldorf, what did you ask for this Christmas?” Statler asked.
”The same thing I always ask for, but I never get it.” Waldorf replied.
“What's that?” Statler wondered.
”This theater to be destroyed.” Waldorf replied.
The two hecklers then shared a laugh. It seemed to be a normal show at the Muppet Theater, but that’s just the opposite of what will happen.
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