2007 Muppet Presidential Election Part 3

[Erine81981]

Herry: No no no Biff and Sully. Vote for Grover. He knows what he's doing.

 

[The Count]

Count: Of course he knows vhat he's doing... He has the lead vith 12 wotes. But if Piggy doesn't get some more wotes, then I'm afraid that the vomen of the Muppet universe vill have lost a rallying figure in this race they can be proud to look up to.

 

[dabauckham]

*Biff, never at a loss for words, starts yammering, while Sully keeps his thoughts to himself.*

Biff: Well, all o' ya've got somethin' to say. I've got this to say - why can't you work together as our leaders? That seems like the kinda thing this guy I heard of...oh, what's his name...Tim? No, that ain't it... Slim? No, that ain't right either. HEY SULLY!!! Who's that guy we saw on the TV before talking about those Muppet guys...

Sully: *writes, holds up a sign for Biff, sighing*

Biff: ...Jim, that's his name! Yeah, this guy Jim, he said we all gotta work together. So why does one guy or gal gotta be the top tomato? If you know what I mean... Jeez, my head is spinnin' wit' all o' this.

 

[The Count]

Count: Vell... Ve vill be vorking together. But just like there's Kermit who leads the troop at the theater, or the foreman who gives you your instructions at the vorksite, ve need someone to make the decisions that'll affect our Muppety nation and then the rest of us vork together to make those decisions come about, thus hopefully bettering our world.
But to decide who vill be that leader, ve have vhat's deemed to be a fair system giving everyone who vants to be that leader the opportunity to be so, decided upon by whoever gets the most wotes cast by the everyday people like you and Sully and me who choose to wote for that candidate.

Hope I vas able to answer your question Biff. And please wote for Miss Piggy.

 

[Ruahnna]

Ru: Piggy, honey, we're not tied for first anymore. I'm sorry--I know it's partly my fault because I've been so busy this week. I didn't PM anyone and ask for votes--I'm letting the voters choose. Maybe you could make a campaign speech or something, if you still want to do this.
Miss Piggy, Presidential Candidate: (distractedly) What? What were you saying, dear?
Ru: Honey--we're not doing so hot in the polls.
Miss Piggy, Presidential Candidate: What polls? (looks at watch) Oh! There is so much to do!
Ru: (now very puzzled) The Presidential polls. We're not--well, we were tied, but now we're not. Dr. Honeydew and Grover are pulling ahead. But you're right--there's a lot to do. Do you want to go over some of these campaign notes now?
Miss Piggy: (again, distractedly) What? Oh, no--never mind the campaign notes. I have some very important plans to make.
Ru: (suspiciously) Piggy? Honey--is there something I should know? Or is there something that you ought to tell me?
Miss Piggy: What are you babbling about? Aren't you going to help me?
Ru: Well, honey, I'm trying but I can't get you to settle down and look at these notes so we can--
Miss Piggy: (growling) Forget the notes!
Ru: (stubbornly) But if you're going to make it to the next round, then you have to work on your campaign.
(Miss Piggy takes Ru gently by the shoulders and looks into her troubled eyes.)
Miss Piggy: Read Moi's lips: I do not have time for campaigning. I have a party to plan.
Ru: But Piggy, there's more to an election than having a party at the end.
Miss Piggy: I'm going to speak more slowly so you can follow me. Moi is not having a campaign party--Moi is having a birthday party.
Ru: (dryly) I think we already celebrated your birthday, dear. I don't think people will bring presents a second time.
Miss Piggy: (triumphantly) Oh--but they will! Because this time, the birthday party is for KERMIT!
Ru: For...for Kermit? Ohmigosh! Is that--is that next week?
Miss Piggy: Next Wednesday. And we have a lot to do!
Ru: Oh! Oh, gosh! I completely forgot! I was so wrapped up in the campaign and everything that I just...what can I do? Have you hired a caterer? Do we have a cake? Do we need balloons and streamers and stuff?
Miss Piggy: (calmly) Of course, yes, and absolutely. But I need someone to issue invitations. I was thinking of our room, but it's too small.
Ru: (muttering) You're telling me!
Miss Piggy: What?
Ru: Nothing! Nothing, Piggy. Where can we have it?
Miss Piggy: Ask Mon Ami Eduardo if we can use the second floor common room, s'il vous plait?
Ru: What time?
Miss Piggy: After supperish--Moi will get him out of the dorm with a moonlit walk. When we come back in....
Kermit: Hi guys! What's up? How goes the campaign?
(Ru and Piggy do a fair imitation of jumping out of their skins.)
Ru: Kermit! Oh! Hello! I mean, er, um...Oh. Hello, Kermit--how are you?
Miss Piggy: Hello, Mon Capitan! Vous are looking very pleased with yourself?
Kermit: What? Oh, well, I just finished a big class project. Glad to get that off my plate. Speaking of plate--everybody else eaten supper? Anyone want to come with me to Everybody Eats?
(Ru and Piggy exchanged glances and shrugs.)
Ru: Um, sure.
Miss Piggy: Vous are too gallant, Mon Amour. Let me put these papers away and we'll go with you.
Kermit: Great! I'm starved! So--how's the campaign going? Everything going okay?
(Again, the looks and shrugs.)
Ru: Um, sure.
Miss Piggy: (steering him away with a satin-gloved hand tucked under his arm) Of course. We were just making some big plans.
(Behind Kermit's head, Piggy gives Ru a wicked look, and Ru shakes her head.)
Kermit: Well, great! I can't wait to see how everything shapes up.
Miss Piggy: I'll bet you'll be surprised.....

 

[Luke]

Monsieur Bunsen Honeydew: What a super idea. Piggy organising an engagement party for Kermit on May 9th in those lovely warm comfy snug Muppet Dorms.

*** Penguin minion whispers to Dr Bunz ***

Dr Bunsen : Oh, Kermit thinks she's organising a birthday party? Well it will certainly be a surprise then won't it. Whats that Bean Bunny, a shock? Well if you insist, hehe

*** Dr Bunz gives Bean Bunny an electric shock, he's frazzled ***

Dr Bunsen : Here at Muppet Labs we deeply regret any hostilities during this election campaign, especially the incident when we nerf gunned the gofer. As a token of our esteem we would like to present our favorite Pork related Celebrity, Miss Piggy, with this gigantic cake which Beaker will jump out of and surprise the recipient. Show em Beaker!

*** A smoking, frazzled, overcooked Beaker appears out of the cake wearing a "Vote Dr Bunsen Honeydew - Muppet Presidential Elections" campaign t-shirt. ***

Dr Bunsen : Oh dear Beakie, you were supposed to get in the cake AFTER the Swedish Chef baked it! Oh well, i suppose i should say Well Done, as you certainly are! That's all everybody, keep up the good work and keep voting for Bunz !!!

*** Announcer appears - "A stunt rabbit was used in the making of this post, not the real Bean Bunny, who was too badly shocked during the rehearsal. This post brought to you by Doctor Bunz Space Travel - We'll fly you to the moon, but we can't guarantee to bring you back! Vote Doctor Bunsen Honeydew - The only candidate who will greenlight Fraggle Rock - The Musical (With Doozers in Tutus) ***

 

[redBoobergurl]

Cookie: Ooh, look Grover, you tied now with Green Guy

 

[The Count]

*Count, still distraught over the fact that these guys are getting all the votes. Vhat can ve do to get more wotes for Piggy...

 

[anytimepally]

The Amazing Mumford: Ladies and Gentlemen.. it is I, the Amazing.. hmm.. Where is everyone? The night before the polls close and no one is campaigning? ... Ladies and Gentlemen, feast your eyes as, I the Amazing Mumford, wave my magic wand and say the magic word and bring the candidates and their managers back to this thread for one final push before the polls close.. after which I shall cast my own vote..

(waves magic wand)

A-la Peanut Butter Sandwiches!

*smoke everywhere*

 

[The Count]

Well... Unless you can conjure up three more votes for Piggy... Looks like we'll be out tomorrow. Strangely, I'm at peace with that. Guess it comes from the new power of being named moderator here. Oh well, night all.