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I'm trying not to laugh hysterically, as there's another person close to me....er...I mean...er...*faking* oh no, how terrible, what was your mom thinking? :o

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Norman Melvin: Thank you, sir. Do you have a computer with internet that I could look up the BOGOFF's number? Or a receipt with the store number?

Norman Melvin: Do you have a phonebook? And a working phone?

Norman Melvin: BOGOFF? That's the name of the store?

Norman Melvin: No, you've done plenty. Just tell me, what store did you buy this at?

Norman Melvin: Thank you, sir. *looks at box* There's no contact information on it. What store did you buy this at?

Norman Melvin: If it's not too much of a bother, sir.

Norman Melvin: *reads box* Hmm...Its a Wonderful Life Wilson's Water Squirter and Sock Separator Apparatus? What happened to Wilson's Wonderful 101 Water Squeezer and Sock Dryer? And they sure do need a good marketing deal. Look at this box. If I didn't know better, I'd think you just took a box...

Norman Melvin: Interesting. You don't happen to have the box lying around, do you? It sounds like something that I could land a good advertising deal with.

Norman Melvin: How does one go about freshly squeezing water?

Norman Melvin: *takes glass and drinks it* Ah. Good water. Is it well water, spring water, or bought water?

Really? That's my least favorite. It was the best I could do for that episode...

Norman Melvin: If it's not too much of a bother, sir. Just please don't get it from the clogged *looks at Grace* you-know-what. (OOC: Only the "you-know-what" to keep Father Moppet from making a big deal...)

Norman Melvin: And I never thought I'd meet a crazy bozo in your own attic either. What's your name, again?

OK...relax...think about being invisible...relax *disappears*

Fozzie's fart shoes provided unintentional controversy.

Norman Melvin: I don't drink tea. Don't you have a glass of water anywhere?

I can do that?

Norman Melvin: Uh...no. It's the toothbrush. *hears thunder and sees lightning* It looks like I'll be staying up here for quite awhile. There's a 1 in 600,000 chance of being struck by lighting, and I sure don't want to be that 1. Do you by chance have any water?