Advice on getting over family deaths

[newsmanfan]

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Miss K, so sorry you're having to go through this. It sounds like you don't have much of a support network right now, and that only makes it worse, I know. I'm with Charlie -- your teachers should know what you're dealing with so they won't come down on you. Have your parents talk to the principal or something if you feel you can't talk to your teachers directly.

All the other advice here is good. Do what feels best for YOU. Everyone grieves differently...but everyone does grieve; it's natural and even right. If your spiritual beliefs hold that there is a soul and an afterlife, remember that: I personally think something of us does continue on, and this isn't a bad thing, just another change.

When you say "little cousin," was she younger than you? Man...that's rough. Whatever her reasons for having done so, try to forgive her for choosing the route she did. It's a shame and a waste but it was her decision. Try not to give in to that darkness as you go through life, okay? And trust that it's not goodbye, it's au revoir, as your porcine lady would say!
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[Misskermie]

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Miss K, so sorry you're having to go through this. It sounds like you don't have much of a support network right now, and that only makes it worse, I know. I'm with Charlie -- your teachers should know what you're dealing with so they won't come down on you. Have your parents talk to the principal or something if you feel you can't talk to your teachers directly.

All the other advice here is good. Do what feels best for YOU. Everyone grieves differently...but everyone does grieve; it's natural and even right. If your spiritual beliefs hold that there is a soul and an afterlife, remember that: I personally think something of us does continue on, and this isn't a bad thing, just another change.

When you say "little cousin," was she younger than you? Man...that's rough. Whatever her reasons for having done so, try to forgive her for choosing the route she did. It's a shame and a waste but it was her decision. Try not to give in to that darkness as you go through life, okay? And trust that it's not goodbye, it's au revoir, as your porcine lady would say!
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Ha Ha, Thanks for the Advice Newsie.

 

[RedPiggy]

My grandfather has told me recently that he's just getting too tired to walk. This is a guy who daily walks 3.5 miles. You could set a watch to him. However, I'm seeing him slow down. I'm seeing him be less interested in things. I know what's coming, and while we've made sure to be prepared, I can't help but grieve preemptively.

Some things you can help and some things you can't. I don't know what the deal was with your cousin, but if the cousin hid it well, it's the sudden emergencies that can be so profoundly disarming. I agree with the others here: notebook it (though do be aware that if a teacher or someone sees an entry that is rather, uh, violent or aggressive or markedly depressing, it could be reported, given that it's the law). Now, what my mother used to do was write a letter to the deceased and burn it, as though the letter was being carried to Heaven in the smoke. Don't know where you stand on the afterlife thing, but the concept is designed to help move things along emotionally.

I'm kinda shocked there's no mention of the school counselor. Seriously? What is that position for if they didn't come to your aid?

Of course, you may have seen the school counselor, and I will happily apologize. I just note one wasn't mentioned.

 

[Misskermie]

Honestly, counselors aren't doing wonders these days.

 

[RedPiggy]

I hear that a lot. It's a shame.

 

[Katzi428]

(((Miss Kermie))) I am SO SO sorry about your cousin . It's tough when someone you love dies so suddenly, isn't it? My favorite aunt died suddenly in November & I remember trying to control my tears on the plane, but didn't do well(The flight was from FL-KS.). I DO have some advice. Try to remember the good times you and your cousin had. Did your cousin make you laugh about anything? Remember those things. My aunt had an incredible sense of humor & whenever I miss her I think of things she's said ,then it brings a smile to my face.
Your teachers will understand if you need time to grieve.(At least I should hope so.)
Everyone here is a GREAT source of support.
Kathy

 

[Misskermie]

heh, i remember the time on halloween when we scared everyone... Hey I'm smiling! It worked! And I know everyone here is good support. So does anyone know how to not to get busted for violent drawings? Because I did. =P
(Thank You Peoples! I feeling alittle bet-ter nowz!)

 

[fuzzygobo]

I'm so sorry to hear of your loss, and I offer my deepest condolences. It's never easy coping with a loved-one's death, but I'm glad you're reaching out for support. The worst thing to do is keep your feelings bottled up inside. I'll definitely keep you in my prayers, and offer you and your cousin up in prayer in church tomorrow.

Cast thy burden on the Lord, and he shall sustain thee- Psalms 55:21

 

[Zoot Fan 1981]

I'm so sorry for your loss. I have lost a few loved ones in my life as well. I was 8 when I lost my dad due to kidney failure and after all these years, I still have my days when I get sad. Maybe your family can help you with your grieving process or you can talk to a therapist. I will keep you in my prayers