When you need to rant...

[fuzzygobo]

You and me both, Jerry. On top of readjusting my sleep schedule, I've had so many responsibilities to take care of, and dealing with all my crazy internet friends. I was almost about to give up, until I ran into one of the friends I have who still has a decent mindset. Knowing that there are people in this world who haven't gone completely bonkers restored my faith in myself and the future.

Internet friends come and go (back in pre-Facebook days when friend was a noun, not a verb) but having real tangible friends you can see every day, nothing compares to that.

When the chips are down, and a real friend gives you a hug instead of (((((.))))), that is priceless.

 

[LittleJerry92]

So basically this is what's been kind of bugging me a little.

So, an old friend (or, more of an aquaintence really) who moved to my hometown 2 years ago got kicked out of his house because his dad is a fat scumbag son of a ***** that eats take out all the time and makes his own son cook his own meals.

They got into alot of arguments and it got to the point where he was forced to sleep out in the garage. So now he was pretty much homeless.

He could live with his mom in NH, but she's kind of strict and has a certain limit to how long he can live there.

So pretty much I was the last person left he could go to, and while I am nice enough to allow someone to stay over if they have to, I was kind of skeptical on letting James (that's his name by the way) come and stay just because we never really talked much in high school, and when he did start talking to me a little more by 2017, it was, well.... kinda awkward. Like, all he'd talk about is smoking weed and getting stoned (and I'm sorry if I kind of sound like a hypocrite when I say this), up to the point where I was just like "Yeah, cool." and then he deactivated his account for awhile.... then reactivated it.

But anyway, I was kind enough to allow him over and honestly..... things have just felt kind of..... well, awkward.

First off, since he has ADHD, he's not very talkative/kind of changes subjects very easily/says the same stuff over and over. So a lot of my responses are just like "Yeah" or "mmm." Second, it also doesn't help that he's unemployed so right now I have to kind of be his supplier. Thankfully he does have a food stamps to buy himself food, but this is where I also kinda need to vent some more. Because he's also a stoner, I've had to give him most of my weed because I'm now done smoking it and only vape (he prefers smoking like most stoners. ) and as a result, he's of course gotten the munchies and eaten up a lot of the food in my house. I've also had to drive him around for rides and go to places to get food and buy beer and a weed pipe with my own money.

What's also been annoying is because of his paranoia, I've had to accompany him when he smokes cigs or weed, the former of which I cannot stand. Doesn't help that I have a cousin who smokes that ****.

I dunno. I hate to sound selfish, but I honestly can only handle people being at my house for so long, especially if it's someone I just casually know.

Honestly I just want to find his dad and punch him in the face then go as far as load up child pornography on his computer and have him locked up. Yeah, that's how much of a cock I can be.

 

[LittleJerry92]

I'm just so ******* aggravated with everything tonight that I literally hate myself and just want to ******* hammer my head to the wall. **** everything.

 

[fuzzygobo]

So basically this is what's been kind of bugging me a little.

So, an old friend (or, more of an aquaintence really) who moved to my hometown 2 years ago got kicked out of his house because his dad is a fat scumbag son of a ***** that eats take out all the time and makes his own son cook his own meals.

They got into alot of arguments and it got to the point where he was forced to sleep out in the garage. So now he was pretty much homeless.

He could live with his mom in NH, but she's kind of strict and has a certain limit to how long he can live there.

So pretty much I was the last person left he could go to, and while I am nice enough to allow someone to stay over if they have to, I was kind of skeptical on letting James (that's his name by the way) come and stay just because we never really talked much in high school, and when he did start talking to me a little more by 2017, it was, well.... kinda awkward. Like, all he'd talk about is smoking weed and getting stoned (and I'm sorry if I kind of sound like a hypocrite when I say this), up to the point where I was just like "Yeah, cool." and then he deactivated his account for awhile.... then reactivated it.

But anyway, I was kind enough to allow him over and honestly..... things have just felt kind of..... well, awkward.

First off, since he has ADHD, he's not very talkative/kind of changes subjects very easily/says the same stuff over and over. So a lot of my responses are just like "Yeah" or "mmm." Second, it also doesn't help that he's unemployed so right now I have to kind of be his supplier. Thankfully he does have a food stamps to buy himself food, but this is where I also kinda need to vent some more. Because he's also a stoner, I've had to give him most of my weed because I'm now done smoking it and only vape (he prefers smoking like most stoners. ) and as a result, he's of course gotten the munchies and eaten up a lot of the food in my house. I've also had to drive him around for rides and go to places to get food and buy beer and a weed pipe with my own money.

What's also been annoying is because of his paranoia, I've had to accompany him when he smokes cigs or weed, the former of which I cannot stand. Doesn't help that I have a cousin who smokes that ****.

I dunno. I hate to sound selfish, but I honestly can only handle people being at my house for so long, especially if it's someone I just casually know.

Honestly I just want to find his dad and punch him in the face then go as far as load up child pornography on his computer and have him locked up. Yeah, that's how much of a cock I can be.

It's one thing to take somebody in who's down on his luck.
It's something else to be an enabler that doesn't motivate him to change. Why should he look for a job? He's got weed, beer, a munchie stash and a roof over his head. If you really want to help him, he should go to counseling to conquer his addictions, and look for a job. Even a minimum wage job like flipping burgers or pumping gas is more productive than doing nothing.
This is where tough love comes in. You say "Here's the deal. As long as you're under our roof, you go out pounding the pavement every day to find a job. If not you do chores around here to earn your keep. Charge rent, give him some sense of responsibility.

You might have to push him hard. But if you don't, you're not doing him any favors (or you).
I'm siding with his mom. I'd be strict and give him a certain time limit to get his act together.
You did a kind thing taking him in. The danger comes when people mistake kindness for weakness.

 

[LittleJerry92]

Yeah, my parents were actually telling me they want him gone as soon as possible. And frankly, I don't blame him. Kid's been nothing but a real headache for me.

I literally told him straight up on day 1 that he's got to look for a job, and I have not seen him do that one bit.

His mom talked to his dad and he said he needed a few days to think if he wants his son back.

I hate to sound like a ******, but once he's out of my house, that's that. Blocked on all forms of social media, and I'm calling the police if he dares step foot on my yard.

 

[LittleJerry92]

End of the day, all I can say is I don't give two ***** what your situation is. If I barely know you, you are not welcome in my house. End of story.

 

[fuzzygobo]

You're actually doing the right thing. It's not like he's a minor, he has no family and he becomes a ward of the state.
It's up to his parents to a degree, but first and foremost, it's up to HIM.
If he doesn't want to lift a finger to help himself, you can't be responsible for that.
He might get more help in a homeless shelter. Sometimes people have to hit rock bottom before they can change. It doesn't sound like he's there yet.

 

[LittleJerry92]

Nope.

 

[fuzzygobo]

Well, you did more than your part. Even if you have to kick him out or call the cops on him, you have nothing to feel guilty about.

 

[fuzzygobo]

Well, you did more than your part. Even if you have to kick him out or call the cops on him, you have nothing to feel guilty about.