Okay, you guys know I've struggled with weight almost my entire life.
For the past seven months, I've been trying really hard to really ramp things up to really push myself to the limits to try and shed poundage . . . one of the main reasons was because of my TECHNICOLOR DREAMS film I did back in February - I wanted to try to look not so disgusting and offensive on camera as I already to do - but it was also an experiment to see if by doing so, I'd see any kind of results.
So, as I said, for seven months now, I've ramped up my daily exercise regimen by "power" walking three hours a day (not three hours straight, three times a day, an hour each time) - I know that doesn't sound like much effort, but all my doctors have told me that walking is actually one of the best forms of exercise (even moreso than jogging) because you're actually working almost every single muscle in your body by doing so (running is better than walking, but I'm a little too far gone to run for extended periods of time). In addition to that, I've also basically gone on something similar to a crash diet: with the exception of Thanksgiving and Christmas (and the odd cheat day maybe once a month or so), I've eaten nothing by three squares a day - no snacks whatsoever.
So I had to go to the doctor today to figure out why I've been having pain in my lower back that's also been shooting down my leg (turns out my sciatic nerve is inflamed), and when I was weighed today, guess what? There were hardly any results whatsoever. Can you believe that? Seven months of hard work and determination for nothing! I couldn't believe it!
So I've finally decided that I've just had enough. I've been trying for fifteen years to try and lose weight so I can fit in with society and be a normal person, and I've tried almost everything under the sun you can imagine in those fifteen years: gym memberships, various different exercise regimens (including trying Richard Simmons tapes), and all kinds of different dietary changes (portion sizes, alternating certain types of grains or whatever for other subsitutes, cutting out occasional snacks and such), you name it. I've even begged my parents on different occasions to let my get lipo, but it turns out that lipo isn't at all how people describe (it doesn't just suck the fat out of you).
I will admit that I had an epiphanya fewmonths ago that I realized I did this to myself. I've often said my eating habits weren't necessarily my problem but lack of exercise, but I got to thinking about my teenaged years, and looking back on it in retrospect, my eating habits weren't the best when I was a teenager: for lunch, for example, I could eat up to three sandwiches; for supper, I could eat two frozen meals in one sitting. I eventually grew out of that by the time I was in my late teens/early 20s, so yeah, I kind of see that I pretty much did this to myself, and now I have to pay the price.
But, as I said, I'm through. I'm tired. I'm tired of all of it. I've been trying for fifteen years to lose weight, and no matter what I do, nothing works. NOthing. I've just had it, I'm tired and I don't want to do it anymore. As much as I hate myself, I'm just finally throwing in the towel and calling it quits. I just have to face the fact that I'll just have to live with myself as a 300-pound fat ******* for the lerest of my life - repulsing the people around me, and repulsing myself whenever I look at myself in the mirror.
I guess the only way to lose weight is to be a celebrity (Anthony Anderson, Drew Carey, Jeff Garlin, et al).
For the past seven months, I've been trying really hard to really ramp things up to really push myself to the limits to try and shed poundage . . . one of the main reasons was because of my TECHNICOLOR DREAMS film I did back in February - I wanted to try to look not so disgusting and offensive on camera as I already to do - but it was also an experiment to see if by doing so, I'd see any kind of results.
So, as I said, for seven months now, I've ramped up my daily exercise regimen by "power" walking three hours a day (not three hours straight, three times a day, an hour each time) - I know that doesn't sound like much effort, but all my doctors have told me that walking is actually one of the best forms of exercise (even moreso than jogging) because you're actually working almost every single muscle in your body by doing so (running is better than walking, but I'm a little too far gone to run for extended periods of time). In addition to that, I've also basically gone on something similar to a crash diet: with the exception of Thanksgiving and Christmas (and the odd cheat day maybe once a month or so), I've eaten nothing by three squares a day - no snacks whatsoever.
So I had to go to the doctor today to figure out why I've been having pain in my lower back that's also been shooting down my leg (turns out my sciatic nerve is inflamed), and when I was weighed today, guess what? There were hardly any results whatsoever. Can you believe that? Seven months of hard work and determination for nothing! I couldn't believe it!
So I've finally decided that I've just had enough. I've been trying for fifteen years to try and lose weight so I can fit in with society and be a normal person, and I've tried almost everything under the sun you can imagine in those fifteen years: gym memberships, various different exercise regimens (including trying Richard Simmons tapes), and all kinds of different dietary changes (portion sizes, alternating certain types of grains or whatever for other subsitutes, cutting out occasional snacks and such), you name it. I've even begged my parents on different occasions to let my get lipo, but it turns out that lipo isn't at all how people describe (it doesn't just suck the fat out of you).
I will admit that I had an epiphanya fewmonths ago that I realized I did this to myself. I've often said my eating habits weren't necessarily my problem but lack of exercise, but I got to thinking about my teenaged years, and looking back on it in retrospect, my eating habits weren't the best when I was a teenager: for lunch, for example, I could eat up to three sandwiches; for supper, I could eat two frozen meals in one sitting. I eventually grew out of that by the time I was in my late teens/early 20s, so yeah, I kind of see that I pretty much did this to myself, and now I have to pay the price.
But, as I said, I'm through. I'm tired. I'm tired of all of it. I've been trying for fifteen years to lose weight, and no matter what I do, nothing works. NOthing. I've just had it, I'm tired and I don't want to do it anymore. As much as I hate myself, I'm just finally throwing in the towel and calling it quits. I just have to face the fact that I'll just have to live with myself as a 300-pound fat ******* for the lerest of my life - repulsing the people around me, and repulsing myself whenever I look at myself in the mirror.
I guess the only way to lose weight is to be a celebrity (Anthony Anderson, Drew Carey, Jeff Garlin, et al).