Dealing with depression and anxiety

[charlietheowl]

So apparently, (and I say apparently because this is news to me) the reason I'm so upset with my sister's treatment of me is because I act like I thought she was having a go at me everytime she tries to talk to me!

No! I'm done! I am so done!

I'm sorry, that's not very nice of your family or sister to assume why you're angry about things. Hopefully you get a chance to properly explain yourself soon. *hugs*

 

[Drtooth]

I realized that I can't really so much deal with depression so much as trying not to be completely devastated every time more horrifying surprises pop up every day.

 

[charlietheowl]

I've been having a hard time lately. It seems like every time I have an anxiety attack, which is fairly common, the bottom falls out from under me, and it takes forever to recover. I've been going to therapy and getting different coping skills and tools to use in case of attacks, but they're hard to use in the moment, probably because I'm so used to freaking out. It's frustrating.

 

[AlittleMayhem]

*hugs* I'm sorry your having such a hard time. Keep practicing using those coping skills and tools and you'll get better at dealing with the panic attacks. Know I'm rooting for you. *hugs again*

 

[DramaQueenMokey]

I haven't been around at all lately, and I know. I'm prepping for college and well, I'm still in court trying to get education savings account money from my father that is rightfully mine.

Because the case began before I was legally an adult, my mother is technically fighting for my side. And we went yesterday and were awarded more money every two weeks but, my father has yet to give me access to my education savings account money and I used to have a regular savings account at his bank and he took my money out of it and closed the account all together. Now, I didn't earn the money in it, but, it was gifts to me from my relatives that are not him and well, stealing from your daughter is one thing but, stealing money that you certainly did nothing to help her to get is even worse.

My father has 14 days to comply with all the orders the judge gave (particularly the one that gives me full control of my education account savings) and I also have to talk to his mother to get him to sign forms because he's not allowed to contact my mother as she has a restraining order against him (because he beat her up when I was little) but, either way, I know my father's mom will have my back but, I feel terrible for making her have to be involved in this situation but, even she's said that my father should just give me what's rightfully mine.

I really never want to do much of anything what with me still having to print up legal docs for my mom and I really am starting to see how different from most kids my age I am and a girl who I called my best friend in high school, well, I see now how different we are. She will never understand the tough time I'm having and she has no idea what it means to work hard and earn a scholarship; she earned a scholarship because of her father's prestigious occupation, not for any other reason and they have plenty of money to pay for her tuition unlike my family who is mainly relying on my grants and scholarship. Don't get me wrong, she's a good person but, she lives in this pretty detergent commercial world and well, that's not what the real world is like and I don't really want to stay around for when the crash and burn happens.

I'm going to sign up for counseling at my college campus, but, I'm just so conflicted about everything and I really hate the fact that several people have brought up to me that I have to make amends with my father someday. He is a terrible person who hates me simply because of who my mother is to which I always think: if you didn't love her, you shouldn't have had a kid with her. They both had a part in that of course, but, at least my mom loves me and never lets the fact that I look so much like my father stop her from loving me.

I just...I'm almost at this point where I feel like Muppet Magic is beyond cheering me up deep down inside :/

 

[charlietheowl]

I'm sorry about having to deal with this, it's a lot of responsibility to have to take on. But I would say that you don't have to make amends with your father if you don't want to; just because you're related to someone doesn't mean you have to forgive him. You're an adult now, and once all this legal stuff gets done, you can choose to do what you want with your life, and you can choose who you want to be with.

 

[DramaQueenMokey]

I'm sorry about having to deal with this, it's a lot of responsibility to have to take on. But I would say that you don't have to make amends with your father if you don't want to; just because you're related to someone doesn't mean you have to forgive him. You're an adult now, and once all this legal stuff gets done, you can choose to do what you want with your life, and you can choose who you want to be with.

Thank you for the kind words <3

 

[cjd874]

I haven't been around at all lately, and I know. I'm prepping for college and well, I'm still in court trying to get education savings account money from my father that is rightfully mine.

Because the case began before I was legally an adult, my mother is technically fighting for my side. And we went yesterday and were awarded more money every two weeks but, my father has yet to give me access to my education savings account money and I used to have a regular savings account at his bank and he took my money out of it and closed the account all together. Now, I didn't earn the money in it, but, it was gifts to me from my relatives that are not him and well, stealing from your daughter is one thing but, stealing money that you certainly did nothing to help her to get is even worse.

My father has 14 days to comply with all the orders the judge gave (particularly the one that gives me full control of my education account savings) and I also have to talk to his mother to get him to sign forms because he's not allowed to contact my mother as she has a restraining order against him (because he beat her up when I was little) but, either way, I know my father's mom will have my back but, I feel terrible for making her have to be involved in this situation but, even she's said that my father should just give me what's rightfully mine.

I really never want to do much of anything what with me still having to print up legal docs for my mom and I really am starting to see how different from most kids my age I am and a girl who I called my best friend in high school, well, I see now how different we are. She will never understand the tough time I'm having and she has no idea what it means to work hard and earn a scholarship; she earned a scholarship because of her father's prestigious occupation, not for any other reason and they have plenty of money to pay for her tuition unlike my family who is mainly relying on my grants and scholarship. Don't get me wrong, she's a good person but, she lives in this pretty detergent commercial world and well, that's not what the real world is like and I don't really want to stay around for when the crash and burn happens.

I'm going to sign up for counseling at my college campus, but, I'm just so conflicted about everything and I really hate the fact that several people have brought up to me that I have to make amends with my father someday. He is a terrible person who hates me simply because of who my mother is to which I always think: if you didn't love her, you shouldn't have had a kid with her. They both had a part in that of course, but, at least my mom loves me and never lets the fact that I look so much like my father stop her from loving me.

I just...I'm almost at this point where I feel like Muppet Magic is beyond cheering me up deep down inside :/

I'm sorry to hear about this...taking care of college-related finances is hard enough as it is, with all the deadlines, grants, student loans, scholarships, etc. Trust me, I'm in college right now. I can identify with your issues. And remember, there are a lot of people here who will lend an ear and listen to whatever you have to say. We will support you and give you whatever advice we can.

 

[charlietheowl]

You ever have one of those days where you want to crawl in a hole and hide away for a long time? I want to burrow away and not do anything. I've been dealing with anxiety and depression for over two years now, and I know that compared to some people, that's not a long time, but I'm tired of this. I've been trying my hardest, taking medication, going to therapy, working on my thoughts, but it's so hard. It's not fair, and I know I sound like a whiner here, but I have to say it somewhere.

 

[AlittleMayhem]

You ever have one of those days where you want to crawl in a hole and hide away for a long time? I want to burrow away and not do anything. I've been dealing with anxiety and depression for over two years now, and I know that compared to some people, that's not a long time, but I'm tired of this. I've been trying my hardest, taking medication, going to therapy, working on my thoughts, but it's so hard. It's not fair, and I know I sound like a whiner here, but I have to say it somewhere.

Charlie, whatever you do in your life, please don't ever compare your problems to others. They are not more or less worse than mine or anyone else's, no matter how long you've had depression. These problems are important, just as you are and if anyone says different, don't waste your time with them. It's okay to have these emotions (even if today's society says it's not) and if you need to cry for a little bit, then that's fine.

You have no idea how wonderful, supportive and caring you are. Not just to me, but (as this thread proves) to others. You are incredibly strong in ways you don't realize. Please don't ever give up. You need to keep going, not just for your family and friends, but for you, especially.

I'm no expert in coping with these things, but I hope this lifts your spirits up for even just a little while. *hugs* <3