Questions about anything

[mo]

My friends boyfriend isn't treating her right what should i do?

Confront her and tell her you don't think he's treating her right, hopefully she will understand.

 

[minor muppetz]

Ah, finally-- someone hasn't heard of someone/something so they look it up... what a concept these days.

I know. There have been quite a few times in the past when I've asked certain questions on forums and others pointed out that I could have easily looked them up online. And there probably will be more times I ask something on a forum without thinking to look them up.

On a similar topic, since the 1990s (at the earliest) my local newspaper has had a section where somebody answers questions about television. With so many people having the internet these days, it's interesting how that is still in the paper (keep in mind that back in my days, it was only part of the weekly TV listing, but now it's a daily feature). The people writing to ask television questions could probably figure out their questions just as easily if they did the research that the person who answers the questions does (but then if the readers were smart enough then there'd be no questions for the paper and somebody would be unemployed).

 

[CensoredAlso]

My friends boyfriend isn't treating her right what should i do?

I would let her know you're concerned. If it's really bad you might want to tell an adult but I don't know how bad you mean.

 

[Sgt Floyd]

Confront her and tell her you don't think he's treating her right, hopefully she will understand.

I would let her know you're concerned. If it's really bad you might want to tell an adult but I don't know how bad you mean.

NOOOOOO! That is the worst thing you can do. I went through this. Seriously, no one wants to hear their boyfriend is treating them badly. Yes, maybe tell an adult, but I think its best to stay out of it. Seriously. When I told me friend just how badly she was being treated by her boyfriend, she didn't want to hear it. She told me I was just jealous that I can't find anyone and why can't I be happy she found someone she loved (despite the fact before that they broke up about 3 times, each time she called me crying to me :/). After that, our friendship was pretty strained.

 

[D'Snowth]

I haven't been in such a situation like that myself personally, but I kind of have to side with Sarge on this; again, I've never been involved, but I've seen this kind of thing go down before, and usually, the friend in question is so incredibly blinded by "love" (let's say infatuation, it's more accurate in this case) and their own obsession over their boyfriend or girlfriend or whoever that if you do say something, that DO get defensive over your remark, and refuse to see the situation from your perspective, and like Sarge said, they could come up with a number of excuses why not to listen to or believe you, including the grounds that you're just jealous... and in cases like that, yes, your friendship can become strained.

I think the best one can do in a situation like this is just hope and pray that the jerk does something completely and utterly bad to her to make her realize what a rotten person he really is, and make her realize that he's totally wrong for her... even though sometimes THAT doesn't go too well either, because like Sarge said, sometimes, they'll go crawling back to whoever they were seeing because they still don't want to be apart (again, it's the obsessive infatuation they have).

 

[fuzzygobo]

It's a tricky situation, especially in adolescence. Between the ages of, say, 13 to 16 both of them are at volatile stages in their life, neither of them are fully matured (although girls tend to be more mature than guys at that age, chalk one up for you gals!) and breakups seem to be a dime a dozen.

There are a few couples from my high school days that were childhood sweethearts, and have been married for almost 30 years now, but a relationship can't last too long unless
both sides treat each other with honesty and respect.

Sometimes the best thing a friend can do for another is stay back (even if a train wreck is coming) and be there to help pick up the pieces.

Any other questions, check out my column in your local paper, "Dear Fuzzy". Right next to the horoscope.

 

[D'Snowth]

Not to mention 13-16 is too young for relationships anyway.

As far as high school sweethearts being married for years and years and year, it DOES happen: Alan Alda married his sweetheart Arlene after they graduated, and they're STILL married today, they have three grown daughters.

Every relationship is different, obviously, so there's really no guarantees for whatever the aspect it, though it's been said many times before that the best relationships and marriages are the ones that "start as friends", because in the end, you'll always have your old friend at your side.

I don't know if all that is true or not, but I will say if there's one saying I DON'T believe in is, "True love at first sight". Crush/infatuation/along those lines at first sight, yes, but true love at first sight, no... then again, you have to actually know and experience having crushes, and being in love, to know that there is a TREMENDOUS difference in the two... it's one of those things that are really hard to explain, but once you experience them, you know the difference.

 

[Sgt Floyd]

My friend even married this.... certain anatomy part....as soon as they graduated. Of course, I wasn't invited to the wedding. I found out about it through facebook because another one of her so-called friends was complaining about going. Although, I didn't want to be part of that mess anyway.

I have no idea what happened to her since. After this wedding she just...dropped off the face of the earth O_0

But some people, as with her case, are just so starved for a male in their life they will latch on to the first one that shows them any kind of attention, be it positive or negative. I just wish it wasn't this guy...for all I know she's dead somewhere or in Maine. I don;t know what it is with my friends and going to Maine...

 

[D'Snowth]

EXACTLY!

Some girls out there are DESPERATE... DESPERATE with a capital D! They'll hook up with ANYBODY who's willing to have them... heck, they'll hook up with the first person who hits on them... that pretty much happened with The-*****-In-Sheep's-Clothing-Otherwise-Known-As-She-Who-Shall-Not-Be-Named-Who-Used-To-Be-My-Favorite-Person: she went to one of these anime conventions that she goes to like twelve times a year, then The-Jerk-Who-Is-Not-Steve-Martin comes along, starts hitting on her, next thing you know, they move in together shortly afterwards.

And that brings to mind another annoyance: don't you just HATE it when some girls like that will just randomly bring up their boyfriend in conversation, JUST for the sake of talking about him? She had a habit of doing that, and it was all I could do to keep from rolling my eyes: "Oh, he's so cute,", "Oh, he's so wonderful", "Oh, I'm so lucky I found him", yadda-yadda-yadda.

Though, in the end, it's those same kind of girls who are always dumped anyway... matter of fact, that's what that one Jonas Brother said about Taylor Swift: he said she was incredibly needy and clingy, and that she pretty much smothered him to the point he couldn't take it anymore... matter of fact, I think some of Taylor's other exes have said the same thing... of course, leave it to her to be all, "I sure am sick of the media portraying me as this needy and clingy girl who's desperate for boys."

 

[Sgt Floyd]

My friend did that all the time...and she texted him all the time. I actually got so fed up with it one time that I actually flat out told her that she was with me now and she can either stop texting him and talk to me about something that's not him, or just leave.

This is also the girl who dated a pedophile for years...so...yeah, she was like 13 when she started dating him and he was like...19...yeaaahhhh....and she was with him up until 12th grade when she got with this clown. I hate to say it, but as much of an idiot that guy was, I actually preferred it when she was dating him. He at least treated her fairly well...