Nancy Walker - Episode 30

GENERIC INTRO: KERMIT

Brian Henson: "Hi, I'm Brian Henson. How do you explain the success of The Muppet Show? Well there were certainly a lot of important factors: like the guest stars, the outrageous Muppet characters and some perfectly absurd stories and sketches."

"But at the center of all of it was Kermit. Kermit was my father. My father first made Kermit out of a coat that belonged to my grandmother and through the years Kermit changed a little bit, looked a little bit different. and eventually became the Kermit that we all know. But what's wonderful about Kermit is he's the glue that holds all of these crazy zany characters together. Here it is, The Muppet Show."

DRESSING ROOM

Scooter tells Nancy to stand by unaware it's hard for her to stand up.

OPENING THEME

The balcony: As he arrives with Statler, Waldorf says, "Hurry up, they're starting."

CURTAIN/BALCONY

Fozzie nervously announces to the crowd that Kermit has gone home sick and left him in charge.

Despite Fozzie's previous experience planning and co-hosting the show in the Don Knotts season opener and his attempts to take over for Kermit at various moments the year before, Fozzie is at a total loss as to what to do knowing Kermit's not there to back him up. He just bear-ly gets by with continual prompting from Scooter.

OPENING NUMBER - TARGET PRACTICE

An army (including Crazy Harry) attempt to hit a rather big bulls eye target with a cannon backed by a jazzy instrumental. To say they can't hit the side of a building wouldn't be fair - they quite successfully blow up a shack, trees, an overhead plane...and even a big hole next to Statler & Waldorf's balcony.

BALCONY

BACKSTAGE

Fozzie tries to cover his nervousness as he talks to Kermit on the phone. His efforts to assure Kermit that everything is okay is interrupted by Gonzo's news that nothing's on stage and the audience is starting to leave.

CURTAIN/BALCONY

Fozzie assures the vacating audience that there's still lots more show and it's time for the guest star (Statler & Waldorf have to remind him who it is). Fozzie then realizes that he's in the next sketch as well! He brings Scooter on to stall while he gets into costume. Scooter attempts to sell magazines to the audience for his school's fundraiser (he can potentially win a skateboard...something we'll see he eventually gets by season 4!)

SKETCH - LUNCHEON COUNTER

Fozzie works the counter of a diner where Nancy Walker takes a seat next to a purple threatening looking monster (who would be named Luncheon Counter Monster due to this being his debut appearance).

The monster eats various items that Fozzie places on the counter when no one is looking which causes Fozzie and Nancy to engage in Abbott and Costello-esque arguments about where the missing dinnerware is.

Eventually the pair catch a clue as to the most likely suspect and hatch a plan. Fozzie gets a tray of material from The Swedish Chef and puts it on the counter as the two set off and observe in hiding. They discover Luncheon Counter Monster's scheme and are naturally upset, especially Nancy since the monster's hogging the whole place to himself.

BALCONY

BACKSTAGE

Fozzie discovers Gonzo's taken over the phone call and is telling Kermit what a terrific job he's doing...of course Gonzo's interpretation of a great job is not doing the bear any favors. Fozzie grabs the phone back and saves face. He then rushes out to introduce At the Dance. Miss Piggy takes the opportunity to pick up the phone and let Kermit know she's dedicating her performance in Vet's Hospital to him, but Rowlf tells her that Fozzie brought on the wrong skit - but Piggy insists they do the hospital sketch for Kermit.

VETERINARIAN'S HOSPITAL

Piggy rushes onstage to find the Vet's Hospital stage in place - but it's been taken over by dancers and the At the Dance music! The cast tries their best to ad lib around the situation (Dr. Bob: "Maybe it's RHUMBA-tism!") as the dancers do the same.

BACKSTAGE

Fozzie can't believe all the things that have been going wrong (the actors coming off stage aren't too thrilled either). But his problems aren't over...the stage crew is threatening to quit.

UK SKIT: MUSICAL NUMBER - "MY OLD DUTCH"

Burlington Bertie takes to the stage backed by Rowlf on the piano in the first act to go smoothly. He even gets Statler & Waldorf to sing along and weep at his sad song.

SKETCH - BIRD CHORUS

A man enjoys his domestic bliss as he sits quietly in his living room chair reading a book to the sound of his pet bird chirping away in its cage. The bird attracts a woodpecker outside the window who sings along...then a chicken...and eventually a whole slew of birds. The man enjoys the song until a giant chicken crashes through the walls and puts the man in the birdcage and the pet bird in his chair with his book.

DRESSING ROOM

Fozzie assures Nancy that despite a shaky first half, the show has started to pull itself back together. But Nancy deflates Fozzie's ego when she kids him about forgetting her name. She needles him further...

Once Fozzie's confidence is totally shot again, Nancy cheers him up by singing "Pick Yourself Up".

[When Fozzie was rebuilt for season 2, an eyebrow mechanism that allows him to raise and drop his brows was built. The effect wasn't that great and is really only noticeable when Fozzie has his hat off. This scene's really the only time where the audience can get a good look at it.]

SAM'S EDITORIAL

Despite quitting the week before, Sam can't resist the lure of his podium (and soapbox) and lectures the crowd on a massive worldwide nudity problem. ("Did you know that underneath their clothing, the entire population of the world is walking around completely NAKED?!") Sam extends his outrage to the animal kingdom which includes birds...which includes eagles such as himself.

[A re-recorded version of this sermon appeared on The Muppet Show 2 and Muppet Hits Take 2.]

BALCONY

DRESSING ROOM

Miss Piggy borrows a brush from Nancy and is overjoyed that her hunch that she'd be as nice and motherly as her television roles would suggest is correct. Nancy tells her the roles are just an exaggerated typecast and then dispenses maternal advice and an offer of chicken soup to Kermit over the phone when he calls. Miss Piggy's admiration is broken when she hears Kermit's sick with the Swine Flu.

BACKSTAGE

Fozzie can't bring himself to go out on stage again until Scooter hands him a flattering note of encouragement from Nancy Walker.

Fozzie tries to introduce the guest but finds it impossible due to Gonzo's continual reminders not to forget her name.

CLOSING NUMBER - THEY CAN'T TAKE THAT AWAY FROM ME

Nancy and Sweetums (both in tuxes) do a song and dance.

CURTAIN

Kermit, still in bedclothes, arrives to make sure that Nancy gets at least one decent introduction.

CLOSING THEME