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wiley207
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Now that the original version of the 1969 skit about Bert and Ernie's blackout is on YouTube, I have taken the liberty of doing my "modernized" version of the skit...
(We start on Ernie and Bert watching TV, a rather loud DVD of some old Western movie.)
Bert: Hey Ernie… Ernie I’m tired of that DVD, Ernie. Hey let’s turn it off, OK? (Ernie gestures for him to be quiet; Bert looks at the camera) Ernie… Ernie! I think, uh, it’s time to have a talk about taking turns. I mean, you know, uh, you’ve been watching DVDs on TV for a long time, and I wanna listen to a CD.
Ernie: Ssssh! Come on Bert, can’t you see I’m trying to watch TV? Come on.
Bert: OK, smart guy, you watch your ol’ DVD. I’m gonna play a CD anyhow!
(Bert marches over to the CD player, starts playing some kind of rap music being sung by a Jamaican guy saying unintelligible lyrics, and dances to it.)
Ernie: Hey! Hey Bert! Hey I, I can’t hear the TV with the CD going! OK… you want to play a CD… see if you can hear your CD with the MP3s going!
(Ernie goes over to a desktop computer conveniently located near the CD player with iTunes already open, he begins playing an MP3 of a loud heavy metal song with lots of guitars, and begins dancing to it.)
Bert: Aha! (as the TV, CD and computer continue going) OK, smart guy, see if you like this over here! How about THAT?
(Bert pushes a button on a microwave oven and makes it beep over and over. By now the place is full of noise!)
Ernie: Nice!
Bert: Yeah, yeah!
Ernie: Sure!
Bert: Sure! Why not!
(Suddenly with an electrical zapping sound, all the lights go out and the noise abruptly stops and we see Bert and Ernie’s eyes floating against the black darkness in typical cartoon fashion.)
Bert: Well… There. Now you see. You blew a fuse!
Ernie: Ah well don’t just stand there talking about it. You’re the one that had the bright idea of, you know, turning on the dumb microwave. What are we gonna do now? … Hey Bert, how come I can see your eyes?
Bert: Ah it’s an old cartoon convention, the eyeballs in the darkness, you know?
Ernie: Wow! Hey if we keep the electricity out long enough, think of the savings on puppetry!
Bert: And if we keep the lights out TOO long, we’ll crack up. Well I have an idea. You go around and turn off all the things we turned on, and I’ll… try and fix the fuse. (walks off)
Ernie: All right. (Ernie goes around as we hear his footsteps in the darkness) DVD player and television set’s over here… (shuts that off) uh… let’s see, uh… the microwave’s over here somewhere… (turns that off too) …and the computer’s over here… (turns it off) And uh… uh… let’s see… oh, the disc player, back here… (turns that off) There… yeah.
(The lights come back on as Bert enters.)
Bert: Uh… hey how about we play a game of chess, together.
Ernie: OK. Good idea, Bert.
(They do so under the following lines…)
Bert: Yeah I’m, I’m sorry about, you know, the CD player and all, Ernie.
Ernie: Well I, I… I’m sorry about, you know, watching DVDs that much too…
Bert: Well I’m really sorry about the microwave here, that was…
Ernie: Well I’m sorry about the computer, too, you know…
Bert: Well I’m sorry about interrupting you watching television…
Ernie: Well, you know, uh, we shouldn’t really, uh, try to do things like that I guess.
(Fades out.)
(We start on Ernie and Bert watching TV, a rather loud DVD of some old Western movie.)
Bert: Hey Ernie… Ernie I’m tired of that DVD, Ernie. Hey let’s turn it off, OK? (Ernie gestures for him to be quiet; Bert looks at the camera) Ernie… Ernie! I think, uh, it’s time to have a talk about taking turns. I mean, you know, uh, you’ve been watching DVDs on TV for a long time, and I wanna listen to a CD.
Ernie: Ssssh! Come on Bert, can’t you see I’m trying to watch TV? Come on.
Bert: OK, smart guy, you watch your ol’ DVD. I’m gonna play a CD anyhow!
(Bert marches over to the CD player, starts playing some kind of rap music being sung by a Jamaican guy saying unintelligible lyrics, and dances to it.)
Ernie: Hey! Hey Bert! Hey I, I can’t hear the TV with the CD going! OK… you want to play a CD… see if you can hear your CD with the MP3s going!
(Ernie goes over to a desktop computer conveniently located near the CD player with iTunes already open, he begins playing an MP3 of a loud heavy metal song with lots of guitars, and begins dancing to it.)
Bert: Aha! (as the TV, CD and computer continue going) OK, smart guy, see if you like this over here! How about THAT?
(Bert pushes a button on a microwave oven and makes it beep over and over. By now the place is full of noise!)
Ernie: Nice!
Bert: Yeah, yeah!
Ernie: Sure!
Bert: Sure! Why not!
(Suddenly with an electrical zapping sound, all the lights go out and the noise abruptly stops and we see Bert and Ernie’s eyes floating against the black darkness in typical cartoon fashion.)
Bert: Well… There. Now you see. You blew a fuse!
Ernie: Ah well don’t just stand there talking about it. You’re the one that had the bright idea of, you know, turning on the dumb microwave. What are we gonna do now? … Hey Bert, how come I can see your eyes?
Bert: Ah it’s an old cartoon convention, the eyeballs in the darkness, you know?
Ernie: Wow! Hey if we keep the electricity out long enough, think of the savings on puppetry!
Bert: And if we keep the lights out TOO long, we’ll crack up. Well I have an idea. You go around and turn off all the things we turned on, and I’ll… try and fix the fuse. (walks off)
Ernie: All right. (Ernie goes around as we hear his footsteps in the darkness) DVD player and television set’s over here… (shuts that off) uh… let’s see, uh… the microwave’s over here somewhere… (turns that off too) …and the computer’s over here… (turns it off) And uh… uh… let’s see… oh, the disc player, back here… (turns that off) There… yeah.
(The lights come back on as Bert enters.)
Bert: Uh… hey how about we play a game of chess, together.
Ernie: OK. Good idea, Bert.
(They do so under the following lines…)
Bert: Yeah I’m, I’m sorry about, you know, the CD player and all, Ernie.
Ernie: Well I, I… I’m sorry about, you know, watching DVDs that much too…
Bert: Well I’m really sorry about the microwave here, that was…
Ernie: Well I’m sorry about the computer, too, you know…
Bert: Well I’m sorry about interrupting you watching television…
Ernie: Well, you know, uh, we shouldn’t really, uh, try to do things like that I guess.
(Fades out.)