The Stars of The Muppets: Kermit the Frog

minor muppetz

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With the new movie coming soon, I'm going to be posting a series of fan fics called "The Stars of The Muppets", with Walter interviewing different characters. In a way, the title is inspired by "The Stars of Space Jam" VHS tapes that promoted Space Jam in 1996 (though obviously this series of fan fics contain linking footage). I plan on making installments for the characters who appear most prominiently in the promotion: Kermit, Miss Piggy, Fozzie, Gonzo, and Animal (PLEASE DO NOT SEND ME PRIVATE MESSAGE REQUESTS FOR FURTHER INSTALLMENTS). Maybe down the road I'll do ones on Scooter, Rowlf, and others.

I was going to wait until the movie came out and I knew Walter's personality better, but after seeing the clips that have been posted online and after reading the junior novel, I think I can get his personality decent enough.

So enjoy the first installment!

Announcer: Ladies and gentlement, it's The Stars of the Muppets! Tonight's guest is Kermit the Frog. And now, heeeeeeeere's Walter!

Walter: Hi, friends! I'm Walter, and today I'm here with everybody's favorite celebrity, Kermit!

(audience cheers)

Kermit: (humbly) I wouldn't say I'm everybody's fav...

Walter: (excitedly ignoring) Anyway, Kermit, as we all know, you've starred in a new Muppet movie.

Kermit: Yes, it's the focus of this...

Walter: And I've got a clip to show!

(leads to "Pictures in My Head")

Walter: That was a great song.

Kermit: You can say that again.

Walter: You know what else is a great song?

Kermit: Bein' gr...

Walter: (excited) HAPPY FEET!

(leads to "Happy Feet")

Walter: So, how'd you learn to tap dance like that, (to audience) as if we didn't know?

Kermit: What do you mean?

Walter: Well we all know you had dancing lessons from Gene Kelly!

Kermit: Actually that came later.

(Leads to:
  • Gene Kelly gives Kermit a dancing lesson
  • Disco Frog/LIST])

    Miss Piggy: As you can see, Kermit is a great dancer.
    Walter: I think we all know that.
    Miss Piggy: (stern) He hasn't danced with you, has he?
    Walter: No, of course not. But he has danced with Miss Mousey, Mary Louise, Gonzo....
    Miss Piggy: (annoyed) He's also danced with moi as well.
    Walter: Though not that much.

    (leads to "I Won't Dance")

    Walter: So, tell me about your relationship with Miss Piggy.
    Kermit: Well....
    Walter: Piggy sent me footage from the honeymoon.
    Kermit: Honeymoon?

    (leads to "Ukelelee Lady")

    Kermit: But of course I have many friends.
    Walter: And one such friend is Fozzie Bear.
    Kermit: Yeah, we sometimes do acts together, sometimes sing together, and we often travel together.

    (Leads to "Moving Right Along")

    Kermit: Another of my good friends is Gonzo.
    Walter: How could anyone forget Gonzo?
    Kermit: Yeah, sometimes Gonzo puts me through embarrassing situations...

    (Leads to "Sentimental Journey")

    Walter: One of your best-known roles is that of a news reporter.
    Kermit: It's also one I'm most produ of.
    Walter: As a news reporter, they've actually sent you to outer space.
    Kermit: Actually, that was just a set on the st...
    Walter: Let's watch a clip!

    (Leads to Kermit's interview with the Koozebanian Phoob)

    Walter: Let's speak of some of your great acting roles.
    Kermit: Well, I have been Bob Cratchet, Captain Smollett, The Scarecrow, Robin Hood, Flippers, and King Midas.
    Walter: Let's show the clips!

    (Leads to:
    • Bob Cratchet asks Scrooge for Christmas off
    • Captain Smollet's "WHO HIRED THIS CREW???" speech
    • The Scarecrow tells Dorthy he doesn't have a brain
    • Robin Hood battles a guard in the dungeon
    • Flippers
    • The Midas Touch
    )

    Walter: And now it's time for a lesson in being green.
    Kermit: And it's not easy.

    (Leads to "Bein' Green", the version from the Peter Sellers episode)

    Walter: And you've sung other great songs as well.

    (Leads to:
    • Sweet Vacation
    • Frogs
    • Once in a Lifetime
    )

    Walter: So, how's your nephew, Robin?
    Kermit: He's fine.
    Walter: And you've sung with him too, right?
    Kermit: I've sung and swam with him.

    (Leads to "Friendship")

    Walter: You've also sung with great guest stars.
    Kermit: Yeah. One of my favorite duets was with Tony Bennett.

    (Leads to "Firefly")

    Walter: You've also done great talk spots.
    Kermit: Yeah. I enjoyed the conversation I had with Rita Moreno.

    (Leads to Rita Moreno's talk spot)

    Kermit: And I was tickled by Ruth Buzzi.

    (Leads to Ruth Buzzi's talk spot)

    Walter: Oh! I just remembered! Do you remember the time you were in Veterinarian's Hospital?
    Kermit: (scrunching face) I'd like to forget it.

    (Leads to Kermit in Veterinarian's Hospital)

    Walter: Let's hear from some of Kermit's friends!
    Fozzie: He's fun to work with, although sometimes he has a fly in his throat. Wocka-wocka!
    Scooter: Kermit's a great boss. My uncle who owned the theater would be proud.
    Rizzo: I'd say he's a good host. Other employers would just hire exterminators.
    Pepe: Why's everyone talkin' about Kermin, okay? Shouldn't I be the one in the spotlight, okay?
    Janice: Like, Kermit's rully good at running the show, fer sure. I only rully wish he gave more more numbers.
    Link Hogthrob: What's this frog got that I don't got?
    Clifford: Kermit's one hip frog! He's definately a better host than I ever was.
    Sam the Eagle: He's a fine frog. He just hires way too many weirdos.

    Walter: And now, let's end it with one of your best-known songs, The Rainbow Connection.

    (Leads to "The Rainbow Connection" as seen in The Muppets)

    Kermit: Well, thanks for the spotlight.
    Walter: And thanks for being my guest. (to audience) Don't forget to see The Muppets in theaters, and don't forget to buy the DVD or the blu-ray, and be sure to download it legally and watch the TV airings. (to Kermit) Oh, and if you ever return to television, can I host the next show?
    Kermit: You think you can handle it?
    Walter: I think I can do better than Clifford.
 
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