The Incredible Flying Thog

[minor muppetz]

Enjoy this outline!

Chapter 1

Dr. Bunsen Honeydew was backstage at the Muppet theater, looking for Beaker, who was hiding so that he wouldn't have to try out Bunsen's latest invention.

"Hey, has anybody seen Beaker?", asked Bunsen.

"No, I haven't seen him", said Kermit.

"I'm sure he'll show up somewhere, okay", said Pepe.

Beauregard then noticed the top of Beaker's hair coming out from a nearby box.

"Oh, I think I see B..."

Beaker quickly pulled his arm out of the box and covered Beauregard's mouth shut.

"Bo, I wish you would learn to finish your sentences", said Bunsen, "Hmm, nice 'arm-in-a-box'", said Bunsne as an aside, "Wish I thought to invent it first. But anyway, let's all look for Beaker."

"Well, I'm busy", said Kermit, "I have to plan the show."

"And I have been invited to Alicia Keys' party, okay", said Pepe.

"And the band has a gig to practice", said Dr. Teeth.

"And I have to do some set building", said Beauregard, who picked up the box Beaker was in and took it with him.

"Well, then, I guess I'll just look for Beaker on my own", said Bunsen, "I'll just leave this plate of flying pills here on the counter. I just hope nobody eats them. They are for Beaker".

Everybody elft the room, and then Thog came backstage, smelling the pills.

"Oooohhhh, what smells so good?", wondered Thog, who sniffed his way to the pills.

"These look and smell yumy", said Thog, "But I wonder how they taste."

Thog took the plate and ate all of the pills.

"Mmm, not bad", said Thog, who then slipped on a banana peel... And was able to fly tot he ceiling, without falling down.

"Hey, I'm floating!", said Thog, "I've floated, and I can't get down!"

But then Thog quickly flew to the ground.

"Oh, never mind", said Thog, "But I wonder if I can fly again?"

Thog then flew around the room.
"This is so amazing!", exclaimed Thog.

Bunsen thenentered backstage again.

"Oh, my", said Bunsen, "Did you eat those pills?"

"yes", said Thog, "My compliments to the chef."

"Those flying pills were for Beaker!", said Bunsen, "I might get in trouble."

"Why?", asked Thog.

"Because you are not a member of the lab assistants guild", said Bunsen.

"Oops", said Thog.

Meanwhile, on the stage, Beauregard took the box that Beaker was in up a tall ladder next to a wood shredder.

"Well, Kermit said to dump all this broken wood into the shredder", said Beauregard.

"Mee mee?", shrieked Beaker as Beauregard dumped the box.

"Oh, hih, Beaker!", said Beauregard.

Beaker fell right intot he shredder, screaming.

"Uh-oh!", said Beauregard.

"hey, what's happening?", asked Rizzo.

"I just shreadded Beaker!", said Beauregard.

"Oh, that's alright", said Rizzo, "I'm sure he'll be back to normal by the next chapter."

 

[minor muppetz]

Chapter 2

Soon more of the Muppets went backstage and saw Thog flying.

"I can't believe it!", said Scooter.

"I am so jealous", said Fletcherbird.

"Now remember", said Miss Piggy, "Moi am still performing in both the opening and closing numbers this week!"

Thog landed. Everyone applauded. Ecept for Piggy.

"And Pigs still can't fly?", said Miss Piggy.

"Well, I'm going to go fly outside", said Thog.

Thog ran outside. Sweetums saw him go outside.

"Oh, hi, Thog!", waved Sweetums.

"Oh, hi, Sweetums!", said Thog, "Guess what I can do?"

And before Sweetums could guess, Thog flew up intot he air.

"Oh, hey, how can I do that?", shouted Sweetums.

"Try Bunsen's flying pills!", said Thog as he flew up into the sky. Thog then flew alongside some birds.

"You are the biggest bird I've ever seen!", said one bird.

"Well, the biggest one that can fly, anyway", said another bird.

"Oh, I'm not a bird", said Thog, "I'm a monster who can fly now!"

"Well", said the first bird, "You are the biggest flying monster I've ever seen."

Sweetums soon approached Bunsen and Beaker.

"Quick! You've got to give me some of those flying pills!", asked Sweetums

"Oh, I'm sorry", said Bunsen.

"M'yeah", meeped Beaker.

"But we are out of the pills", said Bunsen.

"Mee moutta mees", repeated Beaker.

"But... But I wanna be like Thog!", said Sweetums.

"Oh, then I guess you've got to start eating!", chuckled Bunsen.

 

[minor muppetz]

Chapter 3

Thog flew higher up into the sky.

"It's so nice", said Thog, "getting to see all these clouds up so close!"

An airplane then suddenly flew past him, scarring Thog.

"oh... Oh...", said Thog, "I think I almost had a heart attack."

Statler and Waldorf looked out the plane window.

"Say, I think I just saw a flying monster", said Waldorf.

"Well, it sure beats snakes on a plane", said Statler.

"This flying stuff is a little bit scary", said Thog, "Maybe I should go back down to earth."

Thog flew back down to the ground, but then he heard some alarms, and then saw a get-away car, being chased by the police.

"Maybe I can stop them!", said Thog, who flew after them. But as he was chasing them, he realized that both cars, as well as many others, were outrunning him.

"Man, I can't fly very fast, can I?", thought Thog, who started to cry, "Maybe I should just give up."

Thog went to the ground and decided to waalk back to the theater.

"Welcoem back, Thog", said Sweetums, who was hen puzzled, "Uh... Why arent you flying back?"

"Oh, I decided to give up flying", said Thog, "At least until I lost all my access weight."

Bunsen and Beaker went outside.

"Hey, Thog, how have the flying pills worked?", asked Bunsen.

"I can't fly fast enough, so I'm giving up until I lose weight", said Thog.

"Well, we do have a lot of weight-loss inventions, don't we, Beaker?", asked Bunsen.

"Mee mee mee", agreed Beaker, reluctantly.

Kermit ran outside.

"Hey, Bunsen, Beaker, Sweetums -- Oh, hi, Thog --- We need to get ready for rehearsals", said Kermit.

They all turned their heads, and suddenly saw that Thog was unusually thin.

"Hey, how did you lose all that weight so fast?", asked Sweetums.

"say what?", asked Thog, who then noticed that he was really thin.

"Oh, boy!", said Thog, "Maybe I can fly faster!"

So Thog flew, and was able to fly fast.

"Oh, dear", said Bunsen, "Suppose that was a side effect of the pills?"

 

[Beauregard]

Is it wrong that I read this as "The Incredible Fying Thong"? And then realised it was Thog...and then had an image of Thog...and Thongs...and...well...Let's just say, not pretty.

 

[minor muppetz]

Chapter 4

The now-thin Thog flew really fast, and went looking for the get-away car. He soon spotted it.

"I'll stop that car that's being chased by the police!", exclaimed Thog, who quickly flew in front of the car, and then pushed on it... But he didn't have much strength, and the car ran over him. So did the police cars that were chasing after it.

"Ohh...", moaned Thog, "I feel flat!"

Thog came back to the theater.

"I think I need to see a doctor", said Thog.

"I think you might be right", said Kermit, "Bunsen! Beaker! I want you two to take Thog to the doctor!"

"Okay", said Bunsen.

Thog then shrank a few feet, until he was a head smaller than Kermit.

"Oh, my", said Bunsen, "He doesn't need to see a doctor... He needs to see a shrink!"

Bunsen then chuckled "tsk tsk tsk".

At the doctors office...

"It's obvious", said the doctor, "those flying pills have side effects. You should stop making them."

"But I only made five", said Bunsen, "Thog ate all of them."

"Mee mee mee", said Beaker.

"Can you repeat that?", asked Bunsen, "I wasn't paying attention."

Suddenly, Thog sneezed a flame of fire at them.

The doctor picked up the fire extinguisher and blew out the fire.

"Oh, excus eme", said Thog.

"Mee mee mee mee mee mee", said Beaker.

"I didn't know he should sneeze fire either", said Bunsne.

"neither did I", said Thog.

"That must be another side effect of the pills", said the doctor.

Thog then coughed out two fireballs. The doctor blew them out with the extinguisher.

"I need you to leave the office at once", said the doctor, "The bill is one me!"

Thog then felt a sneeze coming.

"Ah-ah-ah-ah-ah....", said Thog.

"Quick!", said the doctor, "Get him out of here!"

But then Thog's ears lifted up, and fireballs started shooting out of his ear.

The doctor opened the window and started putting out the fire.

"Thog, fly out the window right now!", said the doctor.

Thog quickly flew out the window.

"Man, I can't seem to use my flying ability for good", said Thog, "I haven't been a hero yet, I'm shrinking and losing weight, and now I'm making fire."

Thog then suddenly shrunk to the size of a fly.

"oh, no...", cried Thog.

 

[minor muppetz]

Chapter 5

Thog was now very small, but could fly extremely fast.

"Oh, wow!", said Thog, "Being small isn't that bad after all!"

Thog zipped over town until he found the get-away car, still being chased by police cars.

"I think I can stop those robbers now", said Thog, who then blew fire onto the get-away car.

"Those cops will surely catch those criminals now", said Thog, who then flew away.

Thog flew back downtown, and flew past a window on the sixth floor of a tall building. He quickly noticed that buisness executives were in the room, eating cake and ice cream.

"Oh, I'd like to have some of that", said Thog, who then flew through a small crack in the wall beside the window.

Thog flew around, eating some of the cake and ice cream. The buisness people were having a meeting, completely oblivious to Thog's presense.

"I say we raise prices so we can afford more cake and ice cream!", said one buisnessman.

"Well, I say we cut back on prices, and consider going on diets", said another executives.

"Now I think we should get back to the subject at hand!", said the chairman, "The main reason we are all here, and that's to figure out a way to avoid driving such embarrassing cars."

Everyone in the room agreed. Except for Thog, whow as preoccupied with teh food.

"This is good", said Thog, "But... But I'm feeling another sneeze... Ah-ah-ah-ahcoo!"

The sneeze blew Thog away, out the crack by the window, and caused a fire inside the building.

"Oh, no!", said one buisness executive, "Now my ice cream will melt!"

"Now I regret selling all those fire extinguishers for drugs", said the chairman.

 

[minor muppetz]

Chapter 6

Thog flew away from the building, and landed on top of a parking meter.

"That fire sure is scary", said Thog, who observed all of the people in the building running out.

Thog then suddenly grew back to his normal size again, crushing the meter he was sitting on.

"hey, you're back to normal!", said Bunsen, who had parked is car by that meter.

"Yes, I am", said Thog, "I hope I don't continue breathing fire."

"HELP!", cried a little girl who was hanging from a window outside the building that was on fire.

"Somebody save my child!", cried her mother.

The firemen quickly showed up.

"I'll put out this fire", said a firefighter, who connected the hose, and then pointed it at the building... But instead of water, smoke came out of the hose.

"Don't worry", said another fire fighter, "I've got a long ladder."

So the ladder was rising up from the firetruck, and the firemen were climbing it... But then the ladder exploded.

"Why does the fire department waste money on novelty fire supplies?", asked the girls mother.

"Maybe I can save her", said Thog, "Here's hoping I can still fly...."

Thog jumped up, but couldn't fly.

"QUick, Dr. Honeydew! Give me some more flying pills!"< said Thog.

"Oh, I'm sorry", said Bunsen, "You ate them all, and I was ordered not to make any more."

"But I've got to save her", said Thog.

"You don't even know that girl", said Bunsen.

"Mee mee mee mee", said Beaker.

"But I'm afraid of fire", said Thog.

"But I'm not!", said Gonzo, "I'll rescue her!"

So Gonzo ran into the building to rescue the little girl.

After Gonzo ran into the building, the girl's hands slipped off, and she went falling. Thog quickly ran over and caught her.

"Hey, I saved her!", said Thog, "I'm a hero after all!"

"You certainly are!", said the mother, who then took the child, and scolded her, "Now how many times have I told you not to play on the ledge, young lady? You are grounded for a year!"

The press then ran up to Thog.

"How does it feel to be a hero?", asked one reporter.

"I was going to ask him that", said another reporter.

"That's what she said", said another reporter.

Gonzo then ran to the window that the girl was hanging from, without seeing her.

"Here I am tor escue you, little... Girl...", said Gonzo, "Hmm, she must have been saved. Well, at least I can go on tour in this building. It feels so relaxing."

But then the whole building collapsed, and the collapsing of the building out out the fire. Gonzo was scorched.

"This is the best day of my life!", said Gonzo.

The End

 

[minor muppetz]

I just want you all to know that it wasn't until after I posted the last two chapters that I realised that today is september 11. I hope none of you were offended, by me writing chapters involving a building that caught on fire and collapsed, on this september 11. It wasn't intentional.

And you know, I feel like this would make a good Muppet comic story (I also feel the same way about some of my last few Muppet fan fics).

 

[LamangoNumber2]

I'm more offended I didn't see flying thongs.

 

[minor muppetz]

I'm more offended I didn't see flying thongs.

After Beauregard mentioned what he misread the title as I actually did consider writing in ascene where a thong flies past Thog, but then didn't.

Also, in my mind, none of the original characters in this (except for the birds) are Muppets.