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(Starring: MrsPepper, Vic Romano, ThePrawnCracker, D’Snowth, TogetherAgain, Vibs, and Beauregard)
(Starring: MrsPepper, Vic Romano, ThePrawnCracker, D’Snowth, TogetherAgain, Vibs, and Beauregard)
Episode #: 31
Title: “Regarding Beau”
Original Airdate: 26-Jun-2006
Written By: G-MAN
Created By: MrsPepper
Special Muppet Guest Appearance by: Rizzo the Rat
We find Vic Romano in D’Snowth’s office as temporary second-in command while D’Snowth is on vacation. Vic was busy filling out some paper work when the phone rang.
VIC ROMANO: (Answers) T*K*O, 3976th 1/2 unit, Vic Romano speaking. Uh-huh? Okay, hold on. (Pages MrsPepper) MrsPepper, the 1740th is on the phone, did we receive their new shipment of electronic equipment by mistake?
MRSPEPPER: (Over intercom) I don’t think so. Tell them to contact AnythingMuppet.
VIC ROMANO: Alright. (Back on phone) No, we don’t have it, but we suggest you call AnythingMuppet, he’s the supply man of our sector, and he might be able to help you out. You too. Bye.
Vic then hung up, and went back to filling out some papers when ThePrawnCracker and TogetherAgain busted in.
VIC ROMANO: Do I really do that a lot?
THEPRAWNCRACKER: Vic, were here to report some missing personal items!
VIC ROMANO: Well, what seems to be the problem?
TOGETHERAGAIN: Were missing the print-outs of some of the fanfics we’ve been working on, that’s the problem!
VIC ROMANO: Well, have you...
THEPRAWNCRACKER: (Interrupting) We looked everywhere, we simply can’t find them!
TOGETHERAGAIN: It’s almost as if they were stolen!
VIC ROMANO: Why would anyone around want to steal our things?
THEPRAWNCRACKER: Well, I’m not sure.
TOGETHERAGAIN: But we just find it rather suspicious that they suddenly disappear like that.
Just then Vibs ran in.
VIBS: Alright, who stole my new copy of “Ridiculous Riots of Riddles”?!
TOGETHERAGAIN: See? It’s too much of a coincidence that something from all of us has gone missing.
VIC ROMANO: Well, I have nothing missing, in fact...
VIBS: (Interrupting) Who stole my new copy of “Ridiculous Riots of Riddles”?!
Everyone then started arguing with each other, when Vic got up from his chair and walked into MrsPepper’s office. Moments later, everyone was inside MrsPepper’s office.
MRSPEPPER: Okay, okay, let me go over the “Missing Items” list: one stuffed Rocky the Flying Squirrel, three printed versions of fanfics written by ThePrawnCracker and TogetherAgain, and a copy of “Ridiculous Riots of Riddles”. Well, it does seem ironic that these things suddenly disappeared, but I seriously doubt anyone around here would steal anything. Our only option is to search the entire building from top to bottom until we find them. Now I want everyone to search their own offices, while I search mine, D’Snowth’s, the lounge, as well as the cafeteria. And remember: leave no stone unturned.
So everyone did just that, everyone’s offices were eventually pigsties as everyone was searching for the missing items. When Vic was cleaning out his office, he even noticed that his wallet was missing as well. No one was able to find anything. Couch and chair cushions were scattered all over the lounge as MrsPepper was searching as well. Moments later, she was in the cafeteria where Beauregard was busy sweeping.
MRSPEPPER: Hello Beau!
BEAUREGARD: Hi MrsP.
MrsPepper raised an eyebrow.
BEAUREGARD: I mean, MrsPepper.
MRSPEPPER: Beau, everyone’s little personal items have gone missing, and we can’t seem to find them.
BEAUREGARD: Hmm that’s a bummer.
MRSPEPPER: Yes it is. Would it offend you if I searched your closet?
BEAUREGARD: No, go ahead, I know for a fact nothing’s in there but my supplies, as I just came from there stocking up on the secret ingredient for the Custodian’s Surprise.
MrsPepper had a sour look on her face, then entered Beauregard’s closet. When she flipped on the lights, the floor of the closet revealed one brown wallet, three printed out fanfics, a stuffed Rocky the Flying Squirrel, and a copy of “Ridiculous Riots of Riddles”. MrsPepper stood there flabbergasted with her mouth-hung open. How could Beauregard steal everyone’s things? Beauregard then walked back into the closet as well, but not for the same reason.
BEAUREGARD: I need to change the trash bag...
Beauregard noticed MrsPepper staring at the floor, then looked down as well to see the stolen items.
BEAUREGARD: Hey, how did these things get in here?
MRSPEPPER: I don’t know Beau. HOW?
BEAUREGARD: Wait a minute, you think...?
MrsPepper started to nod her head slowly as Beauregard began to sweat.
BEAUREGARD: I think I hate this!
Commercial Break.
Moments later, Beauregard was sitting in a chair in front of MrsPepper’s desk surrounded by Vic, Prawnie, and TogetherAgain. Vibs stood in front of MrsPepper’s desk with her new joke book.
VIBS: All rise for the honorab-ble-ish Judge Pepper!
MrsPepper then entered her office, and took her seat behind her desk. Vibs then walked over to Beau and forced his hand on her joke book.
VIBS: Do you so “solomonly” swear to tell everything you know about the truth?
BEAUREGARD: I’d swear, but the standards won’t let me!
MRSPEPPER: Will you guys cut it out!
VIBS: Yeah, you heard her mister! Cut it out!
MRSPEPPER: Vibs, you give annoying bailiffs a bad name. Just stand there and read your book or something.
VIBS: Okie-dokie!
MRSPEPPER: Now then Beau, our evidence reveals that you were the one who stole our stuff. Stealing is a federal offense you know, in fact, it just so happens, I have the power to give you a dishonorable discharge into the county jail for this. What do you have to say for yourself?
BEAUREGARD: I have to say I’m offended that you guys would think I’d do such a thing!
MRSPEPPER: Has our “jury” reached a verdict?
VIC ROMANO: MrsPepper, we’ve been discussing it, and we believe that Beauregard has been framed.
MRSPEPPER: Framed?
THEPRAWNCRACKER: Framed.
BEAUREGARD: Framed?
TOGETHERAGAIN: Framed!
VIBS: (Reading a riddle) What house-hold object is constantly misunderstood? A frame!
MRSPEPPER: Vibs, read that to yourself please? Now then, what proof do you all have that Beau has been framed?
THEPRAWNCRACKER: Well, we don’t exactly have any proof.
VIC ROMANO: That’s why we ask that you give us some time to prove that Beauregard here is indeed innocent.
There was a long pause as everyone awaited MrsPepper’s decision.
MRSPEPPER: Alright, here’s what I’ll do, I’m still convinced that Beau did it, but if you guys can find any proof contradicting this belief by closing time, then I’ll drop the charges and Beau’s record will remain spotless.
VIC ROMANO: Great! Come on guys!
With that, Vic, Prawnie, and Toga rushed out of the office and down the hallway to Beau’s closet.
MRSPEPPER: As for you Beauregard, to prevent you from attempting to steal anymore of our stuff, you’re going to hold my hand for the rest of the day until they clear your name! Now come on, it’s lunch time!
With that, MrsPepper grabbed Beauregard’s hand and dragged him into her little lunch parlor that she and D’Snowth eat lunch in, whiles Vibs by this time was lying on the floor snickering at her new joke book. Once inside the lunch parlor, MrsPepper opened her lunch box to enjoy her roast beef sandwich with one hand, only to find her sandwich was missing.
MRSPEPPER: Now see what you did? You stole my sandwich while I wasn’t even looking. Well, just for that, I hope you choke on it!
Meanwhile, inside Beau’s closet...
TOGETHERAGAIN: (Shivering) Why does Beauregard’s closet have to be right next to the freezer?
VIC ROMANO: Because he’s a nut.
THEPRAWNCRACKER: I can’t find anything around here! Do you see anything?
VIC ROMANO: Not a thing, how about you?
TOGETHERAGAIN: No dice.
VIC ROMANO: Boy, I sure do hate letting Beau down like this!
With that, the three began to disappointingly leave Beau’s closet, when they suddenly heard a faint grunting sound. They looked around to see what was causing the noise, as the grunting became louder and louder. Prawnie’s sharp eyes then noticed a little knothole in the corner of the closet. They gathered around it, when all of the sudden, MrsPepper’s roast beef sandwich, now dusty and grimy was pushed out of the hole. Following the sandwich was Rizzo the Rat.
RIZZO THE RAT: (Happily sighs) Chow time! Ha-ha!
Rizzo began to eat the sandwich when he looked up and saw the three staring at him.
RIZZO THE RAT: Hey, do you mind? No visitors until I’ve gotten my new place here situated! (Looks around) Hey, where’s my new foiniture?!
With that, Vic picked up Rizzo by his tail.
RIZZO THE RAT: (High pitched voice) HEY! PUT ME DOWN!
VIC ROMANO: I think we found our rat!
RIZZO THE RAT: That’s Rizzo the Rat t’you buster!
Commercial Break.
Moments later in MrsPepper’s office...
MRSPEPPER: ...So let me get this straight, you were going to set up your new apartment in Beauregard’s closet, and thought our stuff was rat-sized furniture up for grabs?
RIZZO THE RAT: Hey, a rat’s gotta have a home too y’know?
MRSPEPPER: Vic, you please escort Rizzo out of the building?
VIC ROMANO: Yes ma’am.
With that, Vic Romano walked out of the room, still holding Rizzo by the tail.
RIZZO THE RAT: Hey buddy, watch da tail, or I’ll have my people call your people!
MRSPEPPER: Beauregard, I feel really bad about all of this, I should‘ve known that you wouldn‘t have done anything like this to us.
BEAUREGARD: Oh well, it’s okay...
MRSPEPPER: No it’s not, it wasn’t fair for me to jump to conclusions and falsely accuse you. I would like to offer you my sincerest apology. And if there’s anything we can do for you, anything at all, you name it!
BEAUREGARD: Well, there is one thing...
MRSPEPPER: Anything at all! What is it?
BEAUREGARD: Can I stop holding your hand now?
THE END
Executive Producer: Phillip Chapman
Producer: MrsPepper
Head Writer: D’Snowth
Executive Producer: Phillip Chapman
Producer: MrsPepper
Head Writer: D’Snowth
