Silent Hensonville

[RedPiggy]

Author's Note: This story is dark, as it's going to be like the survival/horror video game/movie, Silent Hill.

Chapter 1: Let’s Swallow Them Alive, Like the Grave

Kelly smiled as she slowly woke up. It had been nearly a week since she had graduated college with a nursing degree. It had been a long wait. She had tried doing odd jobs during the school years, including working at a saloon that had just opened up several months ago. Still, school had gotten in the way, so she was anxious to get out of school and start a new life. She slid out of the king-sized bed and yawned. Walking over to the bathroom, she opened the door, only to be confronted by billows of steam. She jerked backwards slightly and turned her face, her shoulder-length brown hair sticking to her mouth. “Geez, Spike,” she coughed, “you’re worse than me.”

Spike was a bluish-purple dinosaur, a little taller than Big Bird, with sharp spikes running down his back down to the tip of his tail, which ended in six spikes, three on each side pointing diagonally away from the tail’s midline. He walked out of the walk-in shower, dripping wet. He grinned. “Lil’ slice o’ home, toots,” he said. “Da whole apartment t’ing is kinda crampin’ my style.”

Kelly raised an eyebrow and crossed her arms. “So, your plan is to run up our water bill?”

Spike smirked. “Well, dat’s one t’ing I could run up. Anuddah option is ta --.”

Kelly turned around quickly and waved him away. “I don’t wanna know.” She started to get dressed. “I’m gonna go talk to the personnel guy over at St. Lovelady Hospital. I’m a complete idiot and can’t find my orientation date.”

Spike nodded, putting on a red tank top and a black leather jacket. “Watch da road, toots: dere’s a lotta fog out dere dis mornin’.”

Kelly smiled. “Are you trying to say I’m a bad driver?” she teased.

Spike shook his head. “No, I’m sayin’ uddah folks can’t even drive on a clear day. Jus’ watch your back.”

Kelly nodded. “Okay. What are you up to today?”

Spike looked shocked. “I was supposed ta have a plan?”

Kelly sighed. “Look who I’m talking to.”

Spike patted her on the back. “I’m gonna hang out on da docks. Lotsa fresh food hangin’ out around dere. Should help wit’ da grocery bill.” He put on his black leather boots with silver chains draped around the ankles and walked out of the apartment.

Kelly left the apartment after eating a quick breakfast of cereal that was starting to turn stale. She noted a thick but not completely opaque fog everywhere despite the fact the sun had risen already. The moisture was cold enough on her skin to make goosebumps. She got in her small aging car and drove northwest towards the hospital. It struck her just how … vacant … the small town of Hensonville seemed to be. It was a college town, with a massive dormitory as the most dominant building. She and Spike had lived there for awhile. It seemed like at least a year since she transferred to the University of Hensonville, which was, ironically, not actually in Hensonville. It was just north of the Dorms, which was on the northern border of the town. There were nearly countless classes under numerous degrees, such as Nursing, Creative Arts, Media, Magic, Information Technology, Architecture, Physics, Chemistry, Astronomy, Non-human Medicine, Education, etc. The campus had been huge, so much so it would have required its own map. In contrast, Hensonville was just perhaps twice the size of the campus just north of it.

She had really been surprised at the small population, though. It turned out that the size of the buildings was more related to the size of the inhabitants than the size of the population. Even a Gorg would be able to fit into most buildings. It was a little inconvenient for anyone under 8 feet tall, but you did what you had to do. Hensonville had a reputation of inclusion and acceptance.

The town today seemed, though, like it had been evacuated. There was no traffic, no pedestrians, no one flying through the air … nothing … not even an explosion from Gonzo or Crazy Harry.

The song Dance Magic played on her cellphone. She dug it out of her jeans pocket and answered. “Hello?”

The voice on the other end kinda reminded her of a nasally trombone, so it had to be Boober Fraggle. He was timid at first: “Is this Kelly?”

“Yup, sure is,” she replied cheerfully. “What’s up?”

“Have you seen Kim?”

“No, not really.”

“What about Ed or Beth or Erin,” his voice started to rise in volume and anxiety level, “or Caitlyn or Aly or Ailie with an ‘ie’, or Logan or --.”

“Boober! Boober! Calm down!” she belted out. “I don’t know where any of those guys are! I don’t live there, remember?”

“No?”

Kelly grit her teeth. She had to keep her mouth shut. She just had to. If she got started, she wouldn’t stop. She’d out-Boober Boober himself. She paused until she could hide the irritation in her voice. “Yeah. I graduated and moved out. I’m on my way to the hospital right now – can I call you back?”

Boober gasped, his voice quivering. “Is that where everyone could be? At the hospital? Are you dying? Did your dog’s bite on your arm get infected? Are you experiencing --?”

“Christ, Boober,” Kelly interrupted, “I’m asking the personnel guy about my orientation – for my new job.” She sighed and tried to sound more cheerful. “I’m sure they’re around somewhere.”

Boober paused for several moments. “But,” he added softly, “you’re the only human I’ve talked to.”

“They could be busy, Boober. Don’t get all worked up over it.”

Boober’s voice, suddenly angrier, startled her. “No! This isn’t okay! I don’t mean it’s a holiday or something and the dorms are quiet – I mean for the last three days, no human has been seen anywhere in the area!” He hyperventilated for a moment before calming down. “Just come up here when you get the chance, alright?” He sounded timid. “We just … we just want to know if everything’s okay.”

Kelly took some time to respond. Her voice was quiet and thoughtful. “Alright, Boober. I’ll be up there in an hour or so. Just have everyone keep an eye out. I’m sure there’s a completely rational explanation.”

“I doubt it,” he replied morosely.

“Good-bye, Boober,” Kelly retorted, hanging up. Sheesh.

Kelly pulled into the … empty … parking lot in the back of St. Lovelady.

Okay – now she was getting weirded out. She could understand there being a meeting or party or some other reason for the humans of the Dorms to be busy, but everyone in Hensonville? She got out of the car, double-checking her pockets to make sure her keys were in them and not the ignition, locked the door, and headed toward the back door of the hospital.

It was locked.

The lights inside were off.

Did they lose their license? Did they not pay their utility bills?

Suddenly, she heard the sound of hundreds of clattering feet approaching from around the hospital. She gasped as hundreds of Kabuto-like upright beetles, all about maybe ten feet tall, chittering, their heads twitching left and right repeatedly, started to head towards her. She gulped and started to inch back toward her car. “Crap,” she whispered, breaking into a full run as the Garthim began their pursuit.

 

[Bannanasketch]

Woah. I just started scanning through this story and saw my name so I had to keep reading. This story just seems so awesome already. It seems so scary and dark that i just want to read more. Please post more of this story son. I am so hooked!

 

[RedPiggy]

Chapter 2: But the Wise Listen to Others

Kelly cursed at her car as she tried to drive away from the swarm of Garthim. They weren’t the fastest of creatures, but they were innumerable like grains of sand on the beach.

She thought about Spike as she headed left on Oznowitz Drive. The Garthim weren’t just at the hospital. They were encroaching from seemingly everywhere. What about Spike? They had met several years ago. It was at Ed’s behest at an award ceremony that they moved to the dormitory in Hensonville. The hardest part for them had been an escalating testosterone war, but eventually, there was only Spike in Kelly’s life.

He said he was going to the docks.

Should she go to the Dorms, to comfort Boober and company, or should she head for the docks to rescue Spike?

She snapped her fingers. Duh. She had a cell phone, and so did he. She called him, screaming.

“Lil’ busy at da moment!” he screamed back, grunting and groaning periodically. Soon he continued, gasping for breath, “Get to da Dorms an’ get some major league RAID!”

“I’ll come pick you up!” she replied, her heart beating all the way up in her neck.

“An’ take dis fight away from me? You wish! Now get to da Dorms!”

Kelly hung up and found herself on Chapman Court, the main entryway for the Dorms. She squealed into the parking lot and jumped out of the car. The fog started to disperse, replaced by black clouds that covered the skies to every horizon. The automatic lights in the parking lot went on, casting Kelly in a yellow light. She ran desperately for the ground floor back door, praying it was open. Not that it particularly mattered, because surely the Garthim would just crack through the massive windows in the walls.

She shook the handle and pounded on the door, nearly out of breath, too tired to scream. Her hip hurt, an old injury aggravated from all the running. She could hear them getting closer.

She didn’t want to cry.

You wish.

Kelly suddenly stood erect. She could slap herself. When she had considered leaving the Dorms before the end of school, she had wished for help. Jareth, an arrogant king of goblins, had answered her call, providing her with the magic of the Labyrinth as a reward for her loyalty to him. One of her powers was to have any wish granted.

She smirked, holding out her hands. Cars in the parking lot flew up into the air and crushed Garthim as they tried to advance, leaving, strangely, no yellow smears all over the asphalt.

But by the sound of it, one was insanely close to her. She ducked just as a thick claw swung at her, taking a few bricks along with it. She gasped and looked up. It brought its claw up again, preparing to beat her into the concrete.

A shrill trilling rebuke stopped the claw just centimeters from her head.

Kelly stared in awe as the closest Garthum bowed slightly and backed off, folding its claws across its chest as a sign of respect. Kelly turned around and her jaw flew open to find the back door open slightly, with the black leathery, wrinkled head of Chamberlain grinning darkly at her, his eyes nearly twinkling in triumph.

“MmmMMMMmmm,” he whimpered melodically. His voice was like a man’s who’d been kicked where it hurt. “If you wanted to bring lunch, you should have called first,” continued, cackling, opening the door more widely so she could enter.

Kelly, panting, stared at Chamberlain, who carried a smug air about him. Despite looking like a dead vulture and being as creepy as the Addams Family, she had had a crush on him, for he was the most noble of the Skekses and was never truly appreciated within his species. “Th-thanks,” she told him.

Chamberlain didn’t stop gloating. He picked at some dirt in his clawed hands. “I kept telling you: silly goblin lore pales in comparison to the might of Thra and its power. Why trust little green pig-lizards when you can revel in the strength of a Skeksis?”

Kelly glared at him. “Wh-wh-where’s Ailie?” she demanded in a winded voice.

Chamberlain shrugged and turned away, bored.

“Ain’t nobody know where she is,” answered Zoot, a gangly green-skinned saxophonist with curly blue shoulder-length hair. He adjusted his circular shades.

“Yeh,” added Dr. Teeth, a stocky dark green-skinned keyboardist with a flamboyant sense of fashion, “all the humans went to Splitsville.” He grinned, his golden tooth glinting in the light of the room. “We totally have to accomplishate a profoundable rescue.”

Boober appeared in the common room. “We won’t survive without them!”

Kelly wrinkled her nose and tilted her head in confusion. At least she had caught her breath. “Why? Are you guys figments of their imagination or something?”

“Naw,” replied Teeth, “they’re the ones who pay the rent.” The small group, except Boober naturally, laughed.

“Personally, I fail to see how utter despair is amusing,” Boober told the two musicians.

Chamberlain snapped his beak at Boober. “It could be worse, so stop grumbling! Nothing could be better than what’s happened! We finally get this festering sinkhole to ourselves! The most horrible thing that could happen to us is that they dress this place up in Christmas colors,” he shot a quick glance to Kelly, who rolled her eyes, “and play those appalling carols 24/7!” He chuckled to himself, tapping the tips of his bony fingers together happily. “I believe I shall engage in some much needed home makeovers. I think I’ll begin with shattering the water pipes so that the drywall will take on a much needed green-black hue and musty fragrance.” He left.

“Yo,” came a deep male voice. A purple catfish-faced humanoid with light purple dreadlocks showed up and lifted the sunglasses off of his eyes. He looked Kelly up and down. “So, y’all caught one, huh? What’d you do, beat her up so she couldn’t crawl away?”

“No one beat me up,” Kelly shot back. “Boober called me to investigate where all the humans went. Has anyone seen Ryan, Clifford?”


Clifford shook his head. “Man, ain’t nobody seen nothin’. Don’t get me wrong, sleepin’ in was off the hook – but not all of us can dig it when friends go AWOL like Gonzo does. Little blue weirdo and his rat-‘n’-shrimp combo pals are about to rocket off the roof since th’ man ain’t here to stop ‘em.”

Kelly sighed. “There are ginormous beetles out there called Garthim that won’t stop unless they get what they want.”

Clifford smirked. “Seems like all they really want is human flesh. Don’t know why we gotta get all uptight.”

Kelly growled. “Spike’s out there fending them off right now!”

Clifford shrugged. “Close as he’s been to you … he probably can’t shake the hairless monkey smell.”

“Clifford?” came a small female voice. A young woman with reddish-brown short curly hair and wire glasses appeared behind him, putting a small pencil behind her ear. “Shut up.” She pushed him out of the way and looked at Kelly. “The important thing is we stay completely calm. The Sesame Street kids are about two seconds away from a complete panic attack. If Digit hadn’t had the brilliant idea to treat this like a spooky campout, we’d have screeching kids running throughout the place and risking the safety of all of us.”

Clifford rubbed the back of his neck, his glasses falling back over his eyes. “Vicki, it’s like I said: they only want her.”

Vicki glared at him. “Other than Chamberlain and Uncle Deadly, Kelly’s the only one here with advanced magic skills.”


“Hey, we ain’t exactly useless either,” Clifford retorted angrily. “We don’t need her. I mean, the Muppets beat every villain they come across. Things just work out, no matter how super-crazy the solution may be.”

Vicki continued to glare at him. “Maybe you haven’t noticed, but the Dorms aren’t being attacked by some fast-food junkie or some common hoodlum or an arrogant banker. It’s obvious we’re being assaulted from the darker side of Mr. Henson’s city … the creatures threaten to destroy us.”

“Man,” Zoot commented dreamily, “this is like that South Park trilogy.”

Teeth glanced over at his band partner. “Yeh, but who’s gonna be our Butters – Kelleh?”

Kelly crossed her arms indignantly. “I am not like Butters!”

Dr. Teeth laughed. “Sure you is – you’re fabulously sweet most days ‘til you get that lil’ Professah Chaos thing goin’ on.” He laughed again. “Don’t sweat it, my fine flirtatious Phoenix – we luvs ya anyway.”

“This is all very fascinating, but how are we supposed to survive?” Boober interjected worriedly.

“Maybe we could get Cookie Monster to eat through the bars,” Zoot teased.

“Man, you always let Lips eat through your bar,” Dr. Teeth teased back.

Kelly went over to the wall and banged her head on it repeatedly.

“I don’t get the reference,” Boober said.

“It’s better that you don’t,” Vicki told him, patting him on the back. She walked over to Kelly. “Do you have a plan?”

Kelly shook her head. “I don’t even know what’s going on. I didn’t know anyone was missing until Boober called.”

A male voice cleared his throat. Everyone turned to see Sam the Eagle standing in the archway to the common room. “I hate to interrupt, but a bunch of weirdoes are preparing to do something profoundly stupid.”

“So?” Clifford asked him. “Have you seen our roommates?”

“Yes, but --.”

Before Sam could protest further, they heard an explosion on the roof, followed by a scream of delight and two screams of utter terror.

“That them?” Clifford asked Sam dryly as a large smoke arch appared over the parking lot, along with two smaller smoke arches following the same trajectory.

Sam nodded. “Yes, I believe so.”

They watched as Gonzo, Pepe, and Rizzo plummeted to the parking lot.

“Vicki, go get Waldo to make a net so they don’t splatter all over the pavement,” Kelly told her.

Vicki shook her head. “Not enough time.”

“Not enough reason,” Clifford laughed.

Vicki turned to him. “If you’re not going to be productive or constructive, feel free to return to your room and hide.”

“Excellent idea,” Boober piped up, running back to his room.

Just as the crazed trio was about to crash into a car, the clouds dispersed and the fog rolled in again. Everyone in the common room cringed as they heard the impact. It sounded metallic.

Gonzo, dragging a trembling Pepe and Rizzo behind him, bounded into the common room. “Can you believe how far we got?” he asked excitedly. “I think that’s a record!”

Rizzo shuddered. “I t-t-t-t’ink it’s a l-l-life insurance c-c-c-claim.”

“Madre de Dios,” whispered an aghast king prawn. “Do not be doing this again, h’okay?”

Gonzo noticed Kelly. “Did you like it?” he asked cheerfully.

Kelly smirked. “Did you land on my car?”

Gonzo chuckled uncomfortably. “Uh, well – the good news is, that old thing was about ready to fall apart anyway, so it gave when we landed on it.”

Rizzo peeled himself away from Gonzo and dusted himself off. “Da bad news is dat your insurance is gonna go up.”

 

[The Count]

*Draining lifeblood of thish fic. More... Needs more... Please?
The fog, and the sinkhole, and the hospital, and the pipes, and that's how far I got with the pre-story psychobabble about the subconscious and all.

So yeah... Post more when you can please.

 

[RedPiggy]

Chapter 3: I Am Too Stupid to Be Human

Kelly walked over to the elevator and headed down to the basement level, where her old room used to be, room 2. It had a fairly unique feature: Spike had kicked a hole in the wall, and they had learned it led to a forked tunnel, leading to either the Labyrinth or Fraggle Rock, depending on which tunnel one took. As she approached her old room, she heard soft footsteps behind her. She turned around and stifled a laugh.

The smaller blue furry monster with the melon-shaped head, the bright red lips, and the pink nose beamed as he stood before her, his hands on his hips. He wore a sort-of knight’s helmet that didn’t fit quite right and a red cape.

“Grover?” she asked, bemused.

He tsk-tsked her with his finger. “Su-per Grover, if you do not mind. I am here because I have overheard the Dorms require powerful protection!” He looked around at the long hallway. “So, what daring feats of superhero exploits do you have in mind?”

“Actually, I don’t know yet,” Kelly admitted. “I’m still confused about what’s going on.” She smiled as she jiggled the doorknob to room 2, frustrated a little that it was locked – only to remember she didn’t have the key. She tried not to think about it. “Hey, how’s Kathy?”

Super Grover sighed. “I do not know. I have not had the opportunity to talk with her recently.”

Kelly glanced over at him sympathetically. “How are your roomies handling it?”

“Gaffer does not seem to mind too terribly. The Storyteller Fraggle is helping Prairie Dawn come up with a play to distract Rosita and Big Bird. Everybody loves a good story, after all.”

Kelly nodded and walked away from the door, back to the basement level common room and its elevator.

Super Grover ran up to her. “Wait! Are you not going to enter your old room?”

“I don’t have the key, Grover.”

“I have an idea!” broadcast an exuberant female voice … like Kelly’s, but much more expressive.

The two turned to find a golden-skinned Fraggle with bright red-orange pigtails trailing behind her as she ran. The Fraggle had a small knight’s helmet on and a purple cape.

Kelly sighed to herself. It was going to be one of those days. “Hi, Red – long time, no see,” she told the bounding Fraggle athlete.

“Hiya, whatcha doin’?” Red asked excitedly. “I saw Grover --.”

“Su-per Grover, if you do not mind,” he corrected.

Red nodded exasperatedly. “Yeah, yeah, I know. Anyway, word’s spreading that there are monsters invading the Dorms and I wanna help! I’ll hack my way into whatever dungeon Beth is in and rescue her and then I’ll get Storyteller to write a story about it!” she announced as she pulled out a wooden sword covered in aluminum foil and waved it around.

“My, you are so quick to violence,” Super Grover noted.

Red stared at him like he had just babbled incomprehensibly. “What does killing monsters have to do with violence?” She tapped Super Grover in the stomach. “What were your super plans for defeating the monsters?”

Super Grover frowned. “First, bragging about killing monsters is very offensive when you are talking to one,” he growled curtly. “Second, heroes must help others, not hurt them. Third, we do not even know that there are violent creatures out to get us at all.”

Kelly coughed intentionally.

Red rolled her eyes. “Didn’t you see those giant bugs attack the Dorms? Boober said Kelly used magic to stop most of them.” She leaned closer to Super Grover. “Do you know what that means? Kelly’s a lily-livered scaredy cat when it comes to bugs – and she just squashed a whole horde of them!”

“Uh, yeah,” Kelly responded with uncertainty.

Red nodded. “So, we’re totally going to face monsters.”

Kelly grabbed Red’s cape and pulled her closer. “You said you had an idea about getting into my old room.”

Red pulled away and nodded, grinning. “Oh, yeah! You made that special door for Cotterpin in the door of your room, right? Well, I’m bigger than a Doozer, but I think I can squeeze into it and open the big door from the other side!”

Kelly gawked at Red.

Red tapped her sword on Kelly’s thigh. “Trust me.” She ran back to room 2 and kicked the small door in so she could wriggle inside. She ended up having to sacrifice her helmet in order to get in all the way, but she finally managed, opening the door from the inside. She picked up her helmet and put it back on. “Wasn’t that a genius idea?”

Kelly smiled and nodded.

“That was an exceptionally clever plan,” noted Super Grover approvingly. “Now what?”

Kelly looked around and shrugged. “I dunno. I need to find clues. I kept a crystal ball from Jareth in here,” she told them. “I hope I can use it to see what happened to everyone.”

Red looked around and whistled. “Wow, you can almost make echoes, it’s so empty in here.” She glanced at Kelly with a worried expression. “Didn’t you take all your stuff with you when you moved?”

Kelly nodded. “But I don’t remember finding the crystal ball. On the other hand,” she said after a small pause, “it’s possible that everyone else’s crystal balls are here.”

“What do you mean, ‘other crystal balls’?” Super Grover asked.

Kelly continued to search. “During the summer there was that party in the Goblin Kingdom. The gift given to anyone who attended was a crystal ball so they could grant their own wishes, though I don’t think very many used those gifts.” She stopped and nodded. “If I can’t find mine, we can try the other rooms.”

“Why don’t you just wish all the Silly Creatures back?” asked Red.

Kelly turned to stare at her.

“What?” Red asked her. “You have that magical power, right? You can just poof everyone back,” she continued, “though it’d be a shame to avoid all the adventure we could have.”

Kelly gasped, facing the back wall.

“Oh come on – that’s not mean!” Red protested.

Kelly shook her head. “No, not that – look.” She pointed to a drawing of a Mardi Gras-style mask and roughly drawn words right above it that said “I’M NOT ANYONE I’M ME.”

Super Grover lifted his helmet and scratched his head. “What does that mean?”

Kelly shook her head, shrugging, and approached it. The drawing of the mask shimmered and she saw images of herself, dressed in pink pajamas, typing away at the laptop at the house she had shared with her brother before she lived in the Dorms. Kelly pulled back in disbelief.

“What did you see?” Red asked.

“Uh, me, I think,” Kelly replied in wonder.

 

[The Count]

O-O... The mask? First sign of trippiness. That's not good, it's great! *Leaves radish bars, just get to them before that pigtailed golden Fraggle does.

 

[RedPiggy]

If anyone's keeping count ...

References so far:

Fog, darkness, creepy monsters (all Silent Hill games/movie)
Pretty empty town, though it depends on your POV (all Silent Hill games/movie)
The concept behind the entire plot of this fic (all Silent Hill games/movie, depends on endings you get in the games or the movie)
Quoting Scripture in the titles (Silent Hill is known for its obsessive cult that worships the dark force that influences the town)
Characters with dual identities (Silent Hill games)
The shimmering mask drawing and the quote (Mirrormask -- that's all I'll say about that)

 

[RedPiggy]

Chapter 4: Wisdom Will Save You From Evil People

Kelly, Super Grover, and Red Fraggle finally walked to the elevator and took it to the ground floor. They noticed no one was in the common room. Hearing arguing, they followed the angry words until they reached the large lobby where new residents could get their keys from Ed.

“Great galloping green Gorgs,” Red whispered, wide-eyed.

A thin male with a red jacket and bushy pink mustache was rolling on the floor with Dr. Teeth. Watching them fight were Kermit, Miss Piggy, and Nigel (the conductor who led the band pit on the show after being fired from the emcee position).

Kermit was trying to bark orders at the two fighting males to stop, but they wouldn’t listen.

“Mine!” yelled Dr. Teeth.

“Mine!” the other one shot back.

Piggy looked completely bored: she glanced at the floor, the walls, the ceiling … she also twirled her long curly blonde hair in her satin gloved fingers. As the wrestling match seemed to take forever, though, Piggy growled and stomped over to them. “HI-YA!” She flung up Dr. Teeth off the floor and kicked him several yards away. She did the same thing with the other one, but he ended up smacking into a wall, slowly sliding back down with a low groan.

Kermit scrunched up his face. “Piggy,” he rebuked, “that wasn’t nec-.”

Piggy whipped around and glared at him.

He gulped. “I, I mean – thanks for taking care of it.”

Piggy tilted her head and smiled. Her voice was angelic. “Why, no need to thank moi, mon capitan,” she replied. “I am happy to help vous anyway I can.” She giggled softly.

Kermit sighed and shook his head. He glanced at the dazed loser. “Isn’t there a more constructive way you can deal with this, Floyd – and a more convenient time?”

Floyd coughed. “She was my baby girl,” he stated sadly.

Dr. Teeth shook himself off, not smiling. “At least with yours truly, she’s a super-fly woman.” He pointed at Floyd. “Had you treated her like a woman ‘stead of a babe, you might just have a baby girl by now.”

Floyd stood up. “That’s it – I’m knockin’ all your teeth out!” He lunged for the band leader.

Kelly raised her arms. Floyd and Dr. Teeth shot up into the air and just hung there. She frowned. “The world is falling apart and all you two testosterone freaks can think about is a love triangle?” she barked.

“Man, let us go!” Floyd protested as he floated upside down.

Kelly’s face started to darken around the eyes, nearly transparent flames licking along her hair. She glared at him. “You don’t want me to,” she responded darkly.

Kermit cleared his throat. “Kelly, I was wondering if you could help us solve a mystery.”

Kelly’s face lightened up as she relaxed. She let the two fighters fall softly to the floor before glancing over at Kermit. She nodded, her voice returned to normal. “The other humans are missing. Yeah, I know.”

Piggy shrugged. “If all the humans are missing, then why is Kelly here, Kermie?”

Kermit shrugged as well. “That’s part of the mystery, isn’t it?”

Kelly glanced over at Nigel. “What do you think?”

Nigel appeared shocked. “You … you’re asking me?” he gasped. “No one asks me for my opinion.”

Piggy scoffed, rolling her eyes. “Oh, get over yourself. Be thankful you still have a job at all.”

Super Grover timidly raised his hand. “Froggy baby, may I say something?”

Dr. Teeth snickered quietly. “I nevah get tired of hearing him get called that,” he whispered.

Kermit sighed and nodded. “Yes, Grov – Super Grover? What’s on your mind?”

Super Grover glanced briefly at Kelly before returning his gaze to Kermit. “I am not quite convinced we are to fight an enemy, despite my illustrious sidekick’s assertion.”

“Sidekick?” Red howled, making everyone jump.

“What makes you say that, Super Grover?” Kermit hurried to ask, hoping Red would let it go.

Super Grover shrugged. “Your cute little furry superhero has been playing a scary video game for Halloween. I believe it is called Silent Hill 2.”

Everyone gawked at him.

“What?” Super Grover asked. “It is a very scary game, but upon serious reflection, there are no villains in that game. Superheroes should help people, not hurt them, so fighting is something we true superheroes try to avoid.”

Red rolled her eyes and walked off in a snit.

Nigel looked around. “But who are we supposed to help? Are you saying if we help whoever needs helping, all the bad stuff will stop and our roomies will come back?”

Super Grover watched the conductor. “And I suppose you have a theory?”

“I just wanna know how someone like you got to buy a gory video game?” asked Floyd. “I thought they didn’t sell mature titles to kids.”

Super Grover glared at him. “Big Bird, Rosita, Prairie Dawn – those are children, Mr. Bassman. I can assure you that my resumé is longer than yours.”

“Guys, guys!” Kermit yelled. “This isn’t helping!” He inhaled deeply as the others quieted. “Let’s try to be positive and constructive. Vicki said something about ‘creatures’ attacking Muppets. However, Chamberlain isn’t trying to kill us --.”

“Today,” offered Dr. Teeth with a laugh.

Kermit frowned. “If it’s not about ‘creatures-versus-muppets’, then what is it about?”

“Kelly.”

Everyone turned toward the giant green front double doors, where Spike stood, his jacket scuffed up and one of his tail spikes cracked, but otherwise unharmed.

He stepped forward, glancing at Kelly. “Toots here just might be da problem – no offense,” he teased.

“This is not my fault, Boots!” Kelly shot back angrily.

“No one’s sayin’ it’s your fault, toots,” he told her in a soothing tone. “All I’m sayin’ is dat dose super-sized cockroaches met you first and chased you all da way here.”

“They attacked you too!”

“Yeah, because you an’ I are husband an’ wife, most likely,” he explained. “If our hearts are connected, den maybe dey just went after me ta get at you.” He approached her tenderly caressed her hair. “Wish all da humans back, Kel. You’re da Pathfindah, right? Da heir to da Labyrinth? Do us all a favor an’ get t’ings right again.”

Kelly stared at him. Was that all it would take? She imagined Jareth, draped casually over his large semicircular throne. “Goblin King, Goblin King, wherever you may be – bring all the Hensonville humans back to me.”

Everyone looked around.

Nothing happened.

“Maybe my powers don’t work right. Maybe those stormclouds are coming back,” Kelly theorized.

Kermit nodded to Nigel. “We need a plan. If the Dorms are attacked again, we need a coordinated defense. I need you to coordinate one.”

Nigel looked away. “I’m not quite sure I can.”

Kermit smiled. “Of course you can, Nigel. You’re a conductor – it’s your job to take different players and make a unified piece of music.”

Nigel nodded. “Super Grover? Get Red back here. Cotterpin isn’t here, so I need her and Gobo and Wembley to check the Dorms for magical portals so we’re not taken by surprise. Dr. Teeth, you and Floyd grab Zoot and Janice.”

“We’re gonna sing the bad guys outta here?” Floyd inquired. “Who do you think we are, Cantus and the Minstrels?”

“Little dude’s got a mean pipe,” Dr. Teeth affirmed.

“I don’t think we have time to go find every possibly helpful non-resident here at the Dorms,” Nigel countered. “I want to deal with the inhabitants we have now.”

“What about the children?” Super Grover asked.

Nigel thought for a bit. “Make the kids assistants.”

”You’re joking,” Piggy retorted. “What are they going to do, color pictures?”

“The way to combat panic is to have something more constructive to do,” he replied. “We can’t have kids freaking out during a battle if one happens.” He turned to Kermit. “You’ve worked with them. Have them join Caitlyn’s roommates. Those guys from Muppet Central can monitor the security systems and the kids can help them.”

“Right,” Kermit replied. He took Piggy by the arm. “C’mon, Piggy, we’ve got work to do.”

Nigel stared at Kelly. “Find out what went wrong. Do whatever you need to do to get them back,” he told her as he left.

Kelly shot a deadly glance at Spike. “What do you mean I’m the problem?” she snarled.

“’Ey, don’t blame me, toots – it was dat creepy guy dat lives wit’ Ed’s idea,” he told her.

Kelly contorted her face in confusion. “The Count?”

Spike shook his head. “No – it was --.”

“Me,” growled a male voice as a blue dragon-like male slowly appeared into view. “I was the one who posited the theory that you are here while the others aren’t for a reason.” He took her by the hand. “My fair lady, I seem to be the only one here who can see things as they really are.”

“Which is?” Spike asked him.

“Deadly to all who know,” he replied with a smirk. “Since I’m already dead, I’m not encumbered by the meaningless illusions of the living.” He patted Kelly on the hand. “My dear, are you prepared to see things as they really are?”

Kelly gulped … and nodded.

They disappeared in a poof of smoke.

Spike sighed. “I wish, I really wish, dey served beer here,” he complained as he left to find the others.

 

[RedPiggy]

Well, I like to reference Dorm plots as, well, it's a Dorm fic.

 

[The Count]

<333 Needs more of thish. And so sayeth us all! *Finds a playing card marked as the 9 of Bats. Hmmm, wonder if this could be a clue. *Disappears again.