Seymour and Pepe: Beginnings (okay)

[Super Scooter]

Seymour and Pepe: Beginnings (okay)

By Pepe the King Prawn!
with silly comments by Seymours, okay. "Who's writing this???"

Chapter Ones (because this is the first chapter, okay)

"I'm Seymour!"
"I'm Pepe!"
"We're two of a kind!"
"I'm a little bit forward..."
"And I've got a big behind!"
"Tah-dah!"

I know, I know. Ju are thinking that's where it all began, okay. And while ju are probably right in the fact that we are just puppets and that really is where we were first used, I'm saying ju are wrong because I want to tell this story, okay. It all started a long time ago--

Pepe! You can't start a book like that!

Like what, okay?

You can't start a book by insulting your audience. That's not very nice.

...Ju know, if it were legal-eagles, I would cut ju up and cook ju like steaks, okay.

Please continue!

Gracias, senior elephant. It all started a long time ago in a galaxy far, far away...

STAR WARS

Episode XXXIV: ME!​

That's not what happened!

How do ju know? Where ju there, okay?

Yes, as a matter of fact, I was!

Oh, that's right. I forgot about this.

We were never in Star Wars, Pepe.

I know, I kep telling this Mucas guy when he was making his movies and things he needed to put me in there, okay. He put E.T.s in his movies, he put Grovers in his movies, why no Pepe??? I could be a Jedi, okay! I could speak like Yodas! "Crap wisdom and stuff that makes no sense and stuff, okay!" Ju see? Why was I not in the Star Wars prequels, okay?

Calm down, Pepe. Calm down. It's okay. They're all over. But, uh, we gotta get back to the book, okay?

Okay, okay. We get back to the books. And why are ju saying "okay" all the times in that last sentence, okay? Ju stealing my bit?

Just tell the story!!!

Oh, right, right. Gotcha, okay. It all started a long time ago off the coast of Spains, okay. There I was! A cute little baby, king prawn. Oh, I was so cute, okay! Who knew that those cute little features would grow into being such a sexy king prawn one day! Of course, I knew this, but I'll bet ju didn't know. Well ju should have known, okay! Anyway, these were the times when my parents-es, they would tuck me into my little prawn bed, they would feed me, they would kiss me, they would change my daipers and things... all the things I look for in the womens today! And so, there I was, a child amongst---

Er, Pepe? What about me?

What about ju?

Well, the story is called "Seymour and Pepe", you should tell them about me.

*sigh* Okay, okay, I'll tell them about ju, okay. Yeesh! Well, one day to Mama's surprise, she gave birth to this hulking mass, okay.

There, ju satisfied?

You could go into more detail.

Fine! The hulking mass was named Seymours, okay!

And, boy, was he cute! Everyone loved Seymour! He sure was an attention getter.

Ju were only the attention getter because none of the neighbors could figure out how Mama Prawn gave birth to an elephants!

But an attention getter, nonetheless. Pepe and I grew up playing and singing and dancing, doing all the things we dreamed we would do one day for the rest of our lives! My favorite game was elevator operator. I wanted to be the world's greatest elephant elevator operator.

Well, this isn't so hard being the world's greatest elepatant phelehator populator.

Elephant elevator operator, Pepe. It was my dream! Anyway, I think we're getting ahead of the story.

Of course, Pepe's the older one. I just call him big brother! When I was first born, Pepe said his first words.

"How'd it fit inside of ju, mommy?"

Stop that!

Of course, Papa Prawn left after ju were born. I still don't know why.

I was so adorable!

That's it! He saw ju and croaked, okay!

...Dad was a frog?

Let's just go on with the stories.

Okay!

Hey, how'd you ever breath under the waters, okay? I never understood this.

... Me neither.

Anyway, anyway, the good part of the stories is coming up, okay!

Right. Now that you know about our childhood... er, sorta...

Next ju will learn about our paths... to STARDOM, okay!

 

[Barry Lee]

Ha! I love Pepe' and Seymour and I love this okay?

Gracias, senior elephant. It all started a long time ago in a galaxy far, far away...

STAR WARS​

Episode XXXIV: ME!​

That's not what happened!

How do ju know? Where ju there, okay?

Yes, as a matter of fact, I was!

Oh, that's right. I forgot about this.

We were never in Star Wars, Pepe.

I know, I kep telling this Mucas guy when he was making his movies and things he needed to put me in there, okay. He put E.T.s in his movies, he put Grovers in his movies, why no Pepe??? I could be a Jedi, okay! I could speak like Yodas! "Crap wisdom and stuff that makes no sense and stuff, okay!" Ju see? Why was I not in the Star Wars prequels, okay?

hahahaa, I loved that line, that was wonderful.

This is truely awesome, and the colors are great too! yay! ((Gives Super Scooter a ziffel and muffin, with some m&m's)) You put these characters spot on, and its just great, can't wait to see more!!

 

[Super Scooter]

This story has been given the Barry Lee Stamp of Approval.

 

[redBoobergurl]

This is hilarious! I love when people write stories trying to explain where different characters came from. I love Seymour! Pepe...eh, you're writing him well, he's just not my favorite. But Seymour is awesome. Great stuff!

 

[Super Scooter]

Chapter Dos (this is the second chapter, so it's going next, okay)

Okay, okay, so, now, ju all know now how Seymours and I started out in life, okay.

Sorta.

What do ju mean "sorta"?

Well, you didn't really go into it.

What's to go into it, okay? I was born, I was sexy. Ju were born, ju were uglies. It's the circle of lifes, the first chapters over, on with the show, okay!

What about our childhood? What was it like growing up in a prawn family?

Crowded!

Well, what was it like for an elephant growing up in a prawn family? Did you ever think to talk about that?

Why should the peoples care about that? What does that have anything to do with my stories, okay?

Well, I'm an elephant who grew up in a prawn family.

Hokey-pokey, ju, ju, ju. It's always got to be about ju, okay.

Well, I think the people might be interested in it.

This is my stories!

I have top billing!

My name comes first in the elephants! ... Alphabets!

... Well, it's still interesting information.

Fine, fine! Ju can tell them all about your funky, weird stories, okay. Tell them all the dumb facts about being an elephant and getting your claws clipped and stuff like this, okay.

Well, I just thought they might like to know why I have a fear of butter.

I said okay, okay! Ju have to keep trying to convince me's? Tell them all about your pachi-crustaceanism, or whatever, okay!

... "Pachi-crustaceanism?"

"Pachi-crustaceanism", "Crustacea-dirm", it's all the same, okay.

... Well, maybe I don't feel like telling them now.

Ju go through all this, jour not even going to 'splain to the peoples???

Nope.

Oh, ju are getting on my nerves, okay!

So, one day, Pepe and I were outside playing elephant elevator operator. Boy, those were the days! But this particular day wasn't quite one of those days that you fondly look back upon.

Neither was that sentence, okay.

Shush! Anyway, this particular day, we happened to notice a great, big net up above! Pepe and I were caught by fishermen!!!

Hehehehe! Ju should have seen them trying to push this crazy Seymours into a lobster tank, okay! Hahahahahahaha!

It wasn't that funny.

Oh, it was hillarious, okay! Ha ha ha! Jour big giant head was sticking out of the tops... hahahaha! And they were trying to push you in with a plunger! Hahahahaha! Oh, it was priceless, okay! Jour big, dumb body was all squished up in this tiny tank! HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

*Seymour swats Pepe across the room*

Hehehehehe! It was worth it, okay!

Anyway, we had been captured by men! Sent to be sold into slavery... or, rather, the kitchen at Bill and Brian's Seafood Haven.

Oh, si, si, I remember this, okay. They tried serving ju to that big, fat, ugly, walrus-guy.

... That was Mrs. Boat, the owner.

Ju are kidding.

No, I'm not kidding. She was gonna make me into a pair of boots.

She was going to make ju into a pair of boots?

Yes.

Ju so wouldn't go with her outfits, okay.

That's okay. She didn't FIT IN her outfits.

Ha ha ha! I see what you did there, I see what you did there. That was funny, okay! Funny stuff, Seymours.

What was?

This jokes you tell about the fat lady. Hahahaha! Great stuff, Seymours. Funny, funny, okay.

I was just telling the truth.

Hahahaha! Oh, stop! The jokes just get funnier, okay! Ju are telling the truth. It's hillarious, okay! HA HA!

Why, thank you... I think.

Do ju remember how we got out of this situations, okay?

Er, no, actually, I really don't.

Me neither. Let's move onto something else, okay.

Okay.

By the ways, I noticed somewhere along the lines, you took over telling my stories. How'd you do this, okay?

 

[muppetwriter]

This is really funny what you've got going here, Super Scooter. My favorite part so far had to be this....

We were never in Star Wars, Pepe.

I know, I kep telling this Mucas guy when he was making his movies and things he needed to put me in there, okay. He put E.T.s in his movies, he put Grovers in his movies, why no Pepe??? I could be a Jedi, okay! I could speak like Yodas! "Crap wisdom and stuff that makes no sense and stuff, okay!" Ju see? Why was I not in the Star Wars prequels, okay?

Can't wait to read what Pepe and Seymour tell in Chapter Threes (h'okay).

 

[Super Scooter]

Chapter Three (Yeah, yeah, this is the ones that comes after chapter two, okay)

... Where'd we leave off, Pepe?

Ju were not paying attention, Seymours?

Er, no, I guess not.

Unbelievable, okay! I try to tell a stories about ju and me, and ju and me cannot even pay attention to what is going on with ju and me, okay! How do you 'spect the other peoples to know what's going on with us?

You weren't paying attention either, were you, Pepe?

... This is besides the point, okay.

Oooh! Oooh! Tell 'em about the time that you and me went to that place, but that place turned out to be this other kinda place, and we got hired to be male strippers, but they said you were touching too many ladies, and I was just too fat.

Oh, that was a good one, okay! But, seriouslies, I think we ought to tell this story in alphabetical orders.

You mean "chronological".

Si, si, chroniclethargical, okay.

In the last chapter, we talked about our dangerous adventures on land!

The peoples know this already, they read it all, okay! Why you got to tell them all what we already told them, Seymours?

I'm re-capping!

Well, jour re-capping is re-crappy, okay! Lemme do this, lemme do this. I'll do this much better, okay.

Be my guest, hot shot.

Okay, okay, okay. Watch this, okay. *ahem!* In the last chapters, we talked about our dangerous and scary adventures on land, okay!

That's just what I said!

Nooooo, I added "and scary" to my version, okay. Funny. Ju ever notice how much the word version sounds like vir--

So, there we were! We had finally escaped the evil--

And scary.

And scary--

And horrifying.

And horrifying--

And sexy--

And sexy... "sexy"?

Oh, why, thank you, Seymours. I never knew ju noticed before. Hehehehe!

Grrr! Anyway, there we were! We had finally escaped the evil---

And scary.

Cut that out!

... Sorry.

We finally escaped the evil... lair of Bill and Brian's Seafood Haven! Now, finally out on our own, Pepe and I hit the streets.

Hard. We got thrown out of every hotel, motel, tree house, farm house, dog house, and outhouse there was, okay.

Nice Tommy Lee Jones impression, Pepe.

"Tommy Lee Jones?" I was going for Kirk Camerons, okay!

So, there we were!

How many times ju gonna use that 'spression, okay?

Just once more. So, there we were! Out on the streets of... of...

Don't look at me, okay. I stink at geometries.

Anyway, we were out there. Pepe and I knew our dream was out there somewhere, but where do you look? There's not much call for elevator operators, especially not elephant elevator operators.

Why ju keep lumping me into your elegant perculator pop-tart eater dreams?

Well, that was just the start, Pepe! What I've always really wanted to do was sing and dance and be on the big shows!

All I ever wanted was a date that paid for me, okay.

Pepe!

What? We're talking about dreams, right? What's the problems if I have a dream that all womens would have the equal opportunities of showing me a good time, okay?

... Yeah. Anyway, the elephant elevator operator thing was just a way of breaking into show business. If ever there was a job that would lead me to working with the biggest people in the world...

And we've worked with Miss Piggys.

... it was that! See, as an elephant elevator operator, obviously you're going to attract alot of people, alot of big named stars would come to see something like that! It's called networking.

That's the silliest things I've ever heard in my life, okay.

Anyway, stardom came quickly to me and Pepe. We started working all the nightclubs! Our act was fantastic!

Other than the fact that we were only allowed to perform in the toilets, okay.

Yeah, that part was kinda rotten. But it was our first step to the big time!

Your first steps could wipe out the big time, okay.

What was that supposed to mean?

I don't know. Like I said, I haven't been paying no attention, okay.

 

[muppetwriter]

Well, jour re-capping is re-crappy, okay! Lemme do this, lemme do this. I'll do this much better, okay.

Nooooo, I added "and scary" to my version, okay. Funny. Ju ever notice how much the word version sounds like vir--

Those parts really had me cracking up, h'okay!

Lovin' every bit of it, S.S.!

 

[Super Scooter]

Thanks!

It seems like this is going to be an awfully short story, though.

 

[redBoobergurl]

He he he....this is so funny! It's ok if it's short, it's about quality, not quantity.