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Princeton
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No Day But Today- Episode 27
Airdate: 10-23-06
Written & Created by Princeton
Starring: Princeton as Himself
Redboobergurl as Puddin’
G-MAN as Colby
Amanda Seyfried as Madison
Jerry Stiller as the voice of Mr. Gus
Open on Puddin’s living room. She is discussing her latest fund-raiser with Madison.
Puddin’: Oh, just wait and see, Mad; it’ll be marvelous!
Madison (with mock enthusiasm): Yep, a gala where you auction off your foster daughter sounds like a blast to me. An "auction". What is this, "Roots"?
Puddin’: I never thought I’d say this to anybody other than Prin, but BE STILL!!! Mad, auctions are very much still alive, if the cause is right. And what a cause this is: eyelash cancer awareness.
Madison: Well, pardon me while I play the grand piano. I’m sorry, Puddin’, but the mere idea of an auction seems very downgrading to me.
Puddin’: Please, Mad, my fund-raisers have never disappointed before, and I take such pride in them. And now that I have you, it just stands to reason that you help me out. Whaddaya say, Mad?
Madison: A Puddin’ Parker guilt trip gets the job done every time.
Commercial Break
Cut to the Lecture Hall two nights later. Puddin’ is ready to kick off the festivities.
Puddin’: All right, everyone, please settle down. We are just about ready to start the auction. Our first object for bidding is a beautiful, recent high school graduate, who just happens to be not only my daughter, but quite possibly the prettiest girl in Toledo. But bear in mind, gents (although I try not to), she’s already involved with my assistant, who basically came crawling to me on hands and knees, begging me for a job. But no matter, it’s my pleasure to introduce to you, Miss Madison McDonald! (Madison walks out onto the stage) Okay, what say we start the bidding at $500. Do I hear 500? Yes, I do; 600? Oh, things are really heating up now. All right, now I wanna hear from some serious bidders!
Voice (from the back): 25 grand and that’s my final offer!
Puddin’: Sold! Now, bidder, unless you wish to remain anonymous, I must ask you to step forward and claim your prize.
Mr. Gus: Seriously, Puddin’, when was the last time I did something anonymously?
Commercial Break
Open on Princeton and Colby, racing down the Maumee River aboard the Miss Kathleen.
Colby: Now, where did he say he was taking her, Prin?
Princeton: To that restaurant across the river; I don’t remember the name.
Colby: Fernando’s?
Princeton: Yeah, that’s the place! How do you know it?
Colby: Because that’s where I proposed to Mina.
Princeton: Aw, frittle frick!
Colby: Is that a cuss?
Princeton: It is now.
Cut to the interior of Fernando’s. Mr. Gus and Madison are in the lobby, paying their bill, when Princeton and Colby barge in.
Madison: Prin, what’s going on?
Princeton: I was afraid Mr. Gus was gonna propose to you here.
Mr. Gus: WHAT?! Prin, do you think I’d ever just switch to inter-species dating? We just had some Buffalo wings, that’s all.
Colby: Yeah, but this is a pretty fancy place, and it’s been called "the engagement capital of Toledo".
Madison: I picked the place, and you wanna know why? Because you’re the *only* man in my life, Prin, and because of that, I wanted to get you a gift certificate so we could start coming here, together.
Princeton: Aw, Mad, I’m sorry.
Madison: I forgive you, but you should’ve known better. But, oh, well.
Mr. Gus: Hey, why don’t we top this fine evening off with some tiramisu at the Turquoise Parrot?
Madison: Sure! After all, that’s my favorite. (winks at Princeton.)
The End
Airdate: 10-23-06
Written & Created by Princeton
Starring: Princeton as Himself
Redboobergurl as Puddin’
G-MAN as Colby
Amanda Seyfried as Madison
Jerry Stiller as the voice of Mr. Gus
Open on Puddin’s living room. She is discussing her latest fund-raiser with Madison.
Puddin’: Oh, just wait and see, Mad; it’ll be marvelous!
Madison (with mock enthusiasm): Yep, a gala where you auction off your foster daughter sounds like a blast to me. An "auction". What is this, "Roots"?
Puddin’: I never thought I’d say this to anybody other than Prin, but BE STILL!!! Mad, auctions are very much still alive, if the cause is right. And what a cause this is: eyelash cancer awareness.
Madison: Well, pardon me while I play the grand piano. I’m sorry, Puddin’, but the mere idea of an auction seems very downgrading to me.
Puddin’: Please, Mad, my fund-raisers have never disappointed before, and I take such pride in them. And now that I have you, it just stands to reason that you help me out. Whaddaya say, Mad?
Madison: A Puddin’ Parker guilt trip gets the job done every time.
Commercial Break
Cut to the Lecture Hall two nights later. Puddin’ is ready to kick off the festivities.
Puddin’: All right, everyone, please settle down. We are just about ready to start the auction. Our first object for bidding is a beautiful, recent high school graduate, who just happens to be not only my daughter, but quite possibly the prettiest girl in Toledo. But bear in mind, gents (although I try not to), she’s already involved with my assistant, who basically came crawling to me on hands and knees, begging me for a job. But no matter, it’s my pleasure to introduce to you, Miss Madison McDonald! (Madison walks out onto the stage) Okay, what say we start the bidding at $500. Do I hear 500? Yes, I do; 600? Oh, things are really heating up now. All right, now I wanna hear from some serious bidders!
Voice (from the back): 25 grand and that’s my final offer!
Puddin’: Sold! Now, bidder, unless you wish to remain anonymous, I must ask you to step forward and claim your prize.
Mr. Gus: Seriously, Puddin’, when was the last time I did something anonymously?
Commercial Break
Open on Princeton and Colby, racing down the Maumee River aboard the Miss Kathleen.
Colby: Now, where did he say he was taking her, Prin?
Princeton: To that restaurant across the river; I don’t remember the name.
Colby: Fernando’s?
Princeton: Yeah, that’s the place! How do you know it?
Colby: Because that’s where I proposed to Mina.
Princeton: Aw, frittle frick!
Colby: Is that a cuss?
Princeton: It is now.
Cut to the interior of Fernando’s. Mr. Gus and Madison are in the lobby, paying their bill, when Princeton and Colby barge in.
Madison: Prin, what’s going on?
Princeton: I was afraid Mr. Gus was gonna propose to you here.
Mr. Gus: WHAT?! Prin, do you think I’d ever just switch to inter-species dating? We just had some Buffalo wings, that’s all.
Colby: Yeah, but this is a pretty fancy place, and it’s been called "the engagement capital of Toledo".
Madison: I picked the place, and you wanna know why? Because you’re the *only* man in my life, Prin, and because of that, I wanted to get you a gift certificate so we could start coming here, together.
Princeton: Aw, Mad, I’m sorry.
Madison: I forgive you, but you should’ve known better. But, oh, well.
Mr. Gus: Hey, why don’t we top this fine evening off with some tiramisu at the Turquoise Parrot?
Madison: Sure! After all, that’s my favorite. (winks at Princeton.)
The End
I love it. 