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Princeton
Guest
No Day But Today- Episode 4
Airdate: 2-5-06
Written & Created by Princeton
Starring: Princeton as Himself
Redboobergurl as Puddin'
Beauregard as Teeth Calloway
Kimp the Shrimp as Wesley
Open on Puddin's studio. Puddin' is reading the paper and Princeton is having his morning glass of orange juice.
Princeton: Paper good today, Puddin'?
Puddin': Oh, fine; granted, The Boondocks could be a little better, but other than that...
Princeton: Oh, well, heaven forbid you don't approve of this week's Boondocks!
Puddin': Oh, DO hush, Prin!... (continues reading paper) Oh, wait, this might interest you! Scouts are looking for contestants for a game show, and they're coming here! Whaddaya say, Prin? You wanna be on a game show?
Princeton: Perhaps; which one?
Puddin': It's a fairly new one; Smash For Cash? I've never heard of it.
Princeton: Me neither. But it's worth a try. All right, I'll do it!
Commercial Break
Open on the interior set of Smash For Cash. There are two podiums set up on opposite sides of each other, and next to each podium is a table with a few small glass jars and a large mallet. Princeton is standing at one podium and at the other stands the other contestant, slightly overweight Wesley Beach.
Voice-over Announcer: It's time to Samsh For Cash! Now let's meet our host, Teeth Calloway! (Teeth Calloway, an overly tanned and heavily Brylcreamed man with bleached teeth, runs out onto the set)
Teeth: Yes, yes, yes! Welcome to another opportunity to Smash For Cash! First thing's first: do I look good? Don't bother answering, it's a trick question! So, let's meet our contestants! On this side, we have Princeton Clarkson! Now we're not dummies; is that your formerly known name as an artist?
Princeton: No, Teeth, sorry to disappoint you, but that's my real name.
Teeth: The only way you can disappoint me is to inform me of an O-Town reunion concert! So, Princeton, anybody at home you'd like to say hello to?
Princeton: Yes, I'd like to say hi to my boss, Puddin' Parker!
Teeth: "Puddin'"? Is she edible? Cause if she is, then best keep her away from our next contestant, Wesley Beach! So, Wesley, are you Laguna's cousin that no one talks about? Kidding, kidding! But seriously, Wesley, anything to say to the folks at home?
Wesley: Gene Rayburn you ain't!
Teeth: Okay! Let's review the rules of our game. I will ask you both trivia questions, and for each correct answer you pick up your mallet and smash these little pots that contain varied amounts of cash! Good luck to both of you! Now, let's get to smashin'! Don Ameche won the Best Supporting Actor Oscar for what film? (Princeton buzzes in) Yes, Princeton?
Princeton: Teeth, is the correct answer "Cocoon"?
Teeth: Yes, it is, pick up your mallet and go to town! (Princeton smashes a pot) Holy underwear! $2,000! Congratulations, Princeton! As for you, Wesley, if you want a cocoon at a reasonable price, I'd try Tank Ponchos R' Us! All right, next question! Who invented the sewing machine? (Princeton buzzes in) Yes, Princeton?
Princeton: Is it Elias Howe, Teeth?
Teeth: Yes, it is! As in "howe" did Wesley find a belt that size? Not that it helps! Anyhoo, Princeton, make that mallet scream for a rhinoplasty! (Princeton smashes another pot) All right, $5,000! Bless my soul, Princeton's on a roll! Next question! Who sang the 1972 epic song "American Pie"? And no, Wesley, you can't eat it!
Wesley: All right, that's it! (picks up his mallet and goes towards Teeth)
Teeth: No, no, no! Not the teeth!
Wesley: Princeton, take all my pots and run! You deserve the money! It was great playing with you, but I've got work to do!
Commercial Break
Open on a beach in St. Thomas. Princeton and Puddin' are sitting in beach chairs, enjoying the sun.
Puddin': Oh, Prinny, what can I say? You sure cleaned up good!
Princeton: Oh, it was nothing! Who you really should be thanking is Wesley; if it wasn't for his generosity, we wouldn't be here on this fabulous beach! Anyway, I hope he gave Teeth a good face-bashing.
Puddin': Yes! Boy, that guy was a slimeball! However, it could work out for him.
Princeton: How so, Puddin'?
Puddin': Simple! He changes his name from Teeth to Gums, he won't be living a lie!
The End
Airdate: 2-5-06
Written & Created by Princeton
Starring: Princeton as Himself
Redboobergurl as Puddin'
Beauregard as Teeth Calloway
Kimp the Shrimp as Wesley
Open on Puddin's studio. Puddin' is reading the paper and Princeton is having his morning glass of orange juice.
Princeton: Paper good today, Puddin'?
Puddin': Oh, fine; granted, The Boondocks could be a little better, but other than that...
Princeton: Oh, well, heaven forbid you don't approve of this week's Boondocks!
Puddin': Oh, DO hush, Prin!... (continues reading paper) Oh, wait, this might interest you! Scouts are looking for contestants for a game show, and they're coming here! Whaddaya say, Prin? You wanna be on a game show?
Princeton: Perhaps; which one?
Puddin': It's a fairly new one; Smash For Cash? I've never heard of it.
Princeton: Me neither. But it's worth a try. All right, I'll do it!
Commercial Break
Open on the interior set of Smash For Cash. There are two podiums set up on opposite sides of each other, and next to each podium is a table with a few small glass jars and a large mallet. Princeton is standing at one podium and at the other stands the other contestant, slightly overweight Wesley Beach.
Voice-over Announcer: It's time to Samsh For Cash! Now let's meet our host, Teeth Calloway! (Teeth Calloway, an overly tanned and heavily Brylcreamed man with bleached teeth, runs out onto the set)
Teeth: Yes, yes, yes! Welcome to another opportunity to Smash For Cash! First thing's first: do I look good? Don't bother answering, it's a trick question! So, let's meet our contestants! On this side, we have Princeton Clarkson! Now we're not dummies; is that your formerly known name as an artist?
Princeton: No, Teeth, sorry to disappoint you, but that's my real name.
Teeth: The only way you can disappoint me is to inform me of an O-Town reunion concert! So, Princeton, anybody at home you'd like to say hello to?
Princeton: Yes, I'd like to say hi to my boss, Puddin' Parker!
Teeth: "Puddin'"? Is she edible? Cause if she is, then best keep her away from our next contestant, Wesley Beach! So, Wesley, are you Laguna's cousin that no one talks about? Kidding, kidding! But seriously, Wesley, anything to say to the folks at home?
Wesley: Gene Rayburn you ain't!
Teeth: Okay! Let's review the rules of our game. I will ask you both trivia questions, and for each correct answer you pick up your mallet and smash these little pots that contain varied amounts of cash! Good luck to both of you! Now, let's get to smashin'! Don Ameche won the Best Supporting Actor Oscar for what film? (Princeton buzzes in) Yes, Princeton?
Princeton: Teeth, is the correct answer "Cocoon"?
Teeth: Yes, it is, pick up your mallet and go to town! (Princeton smashes a pot) Holy underwear! $2,000! Congratulations, Princeton! As for you, Wesley, if you want a cocoon at a reasonable price, I'd try Tank Ponchos R' Us! All right, next question! Who invented the sewing machine? (Princeton buzzes in) Yes, Princeton?
Princeton: Is it Elias Howe, Teeth?
Teeth: Yes, it is! As in "howe" did Wesley find a belt that size? Not that it helps! Anyhoo, Princeton, make that mallet scream for a rhinoplasty! (Princeton smashes another pot) All right, $5,000! Bless my soul, Princeton's on a roll! Next question! Who sang the 1972 epic song "American Pie"? And no, Wesley, you can't eat it!
Wesley: All right, that's it! (picks up his mallet and goes towards Teeth)
Teeth: No, no, no! Not the teeth!
Wesley: Princeton, take all my pots and run! You deserve the money! It was great playing with you, but I've got work to do!
Commercial Break
Open on a beach in St. Thomas. Princeton and Puddin' are sitting in beach chairs, enjoying the sun.
Puddin': Oh, Prinny, what can I say? You sure cleaned up good!
Princeton: Oh, it was nothing! Who you really should be thanking is Wesley; if it wasn't for his generosity, we wouldn't be here on this fabulous beach! Anyway, I hope he gave Teeth a good face-bashing.
Puddin': Yes! Boy, that guy was a slimeball! However, it could work out for him.
Princeton: How so, Puddin'?
Puddin': Simple! He changes his name from Teeth to Gums, he won't be living a lie!
The End
