No Day But Today- "His Eye Is On The Penguins"

P

Princeton

Guest
No Day But Today- Episode 21
Airdate: 9-1-06
Written & Created by Princeton
Based on an idea by Redboobergurl
Starring: Princeton as Himself
Redboobergurl as Puddin’
Joan Allen as Sister Aquanata
Sarah Jessica Parker as Sister Marguerite
Jennifer Love Hewitt as Sister Christine
Olaf, Dwayne, and Murray as Themselves

Open on Puddin’s studio. She and Princeton are looking through their mail.

Puddin’: Get anything exciting, Prin?
Princeton: Not really. How about you?
Puddin’: Well, for starters, my parents are giving up our dog, Mr. Gus, and they’re sending him to me.
Princeton: Wow, he must really have been trouble!
Puddin’: Only if you count spreading gossip throughout all of Liverpool trouble.
Princeton: How can a dog spread gossip all over town?
Puddin’: Because, Prin, Mr. Gus can talk.
Princeton: Are you serious?
Puddin’: Yes! Believe it or not, Prin, there was a time when I didn’t have you or Mad to tell my troubles to. Strange as it may seem, I was blessed to grow up with a talking dog. He was a great source of comfort.
Princeton: Well, that’s amazing, to say the least. Anything else in the mail?
Puddin’ (looks at letter): Aahh!
Princeton (casually): Bad news?
Puddin’: That’s putting it lightly! Olaf, Dwayne, and Murray can’t make the recital this Friday. They’re supposedly on vacation in Kokomo.
Princeton: Well, if that’s where they wanna go.
Puddin’: Don’t be cute, Prin! This is terrible news! Where am I going to find replacements?
Princeton: Leave it to me, I think I’ve got an idea.

Commercial Break

Open on Puddin’s studio. Puddin’ is waiting for Princeton to show up with the replacements.

Puddin’ (to herself): For pity’s sakes, where is he? (As if on cue, Princeton walks in with three nuns)
Princeton: Puddin’, may I present your replacements: Sisters Aquanata, Marguerite, and Christine!
Puddin’: Prinny, what in the name of heaven are you doing with a bunch of nuns?
Princeton (to nuns): See, girls, I told you she was godly! (to Puddin’) Surely someone with a sense of humor like yours can see the correlation; nuns are also called penguins! And trust me, I wasn’t about to haul all the Rockettes here from NYC. So what if they don’t have feathers? They’re still penguins.
Marguerite: So that’s why you dragged us here from St. Ursula’s? As nuns, we take offense to the term “penguins”...
Puddin’: Excuse me, did you say you were from St. Ursula’s?
Christine: Yes, we are; why?
Puddin’: Well, my daughter goes there. You may know her: Madison McDonald?
Aquanata: Oh, yes, we’re very familiar with Madison. She’s always trying to lead the class in “La Vie Boheme” in choir class.
Puddin’: That’s my girl. So, sisters, I take it you have experience?
Aquanata: Quite a bit. Before marrying the Lord, we used to be very avid dancers. I guess you never can quite leave your roots.
Puddin’: Well, of course you can’t! So, I think what I’ll do is go over a few of the routines that my actual pupils do, and then we’ll finalize it for the night of the performance.

Commercial Break

Open on the Lecture Hall. Princeton and Puddin’ are waiting backstage with the nuns.

Puddin’: Okay, sisters, you all ready?
Christine: Yes, we believe so.
Marguerite: And we just want to thank you for the opportunity to dance again.
Puddin’: Well, as the Bible says, “Opportunity knocks and God opens the door so he can see his disciples”, right?
Marguerite: Close enough, Puddin’.
Announcer: And now please welcome The Swinging Sisters of St. Ursula’s!
Puddin’: Oh, I didn’t realize you picked out a name for just one night.
Christine: What?!
Puddin’: No, I mean, I like it, it’s catchy!
Aquanata: Not that! What do you mean, “just one night”?
Princeton: Well, now, sisters, I thought that was understood...
Marguerite: Apparently not! Let’s go, sisters! (they leave)
Puddin’: Well, this is just marvelous, Prin. NOW what do we do? (the penguin trio walks up)
Olaf: Hopefully you welcome your boys back!
Murray: Sorry we’re late; Olaf felt it necessary to enlighten the islanders with the wisdom of “Caddyshack”.
Dwayne: Well, Ms. Parker, can we still dance?
Puddin’: I don’t know, boys. Why don’t you go on stage and find out?
All three: YEAH!!! (they run out on stage)

The End
 

D'Snowth

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This is possibly my favorite episode of all time, so far. It kind of reminds me of the T*K*O episode The Joke Killer Strikes Again, where I keep listen to that song To Make a Man sung by Kathy Greenwood when she played a singing nun on Colin Mochrie's short-lived Getting Along Famously,
 

redBoobergurl

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He-he! That was great Prin! Thanks for using my idea! I love that you replaced them with nuns! That was great! Ooh, and RENT reference "she's always trying to lead the choir class in La Vie Boheme" I could totally see Madison doing that!
 

MartyMuppets

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HEE HEE great Princeton. I love a bit of "Christian" humour every once in awhile. I loved the nuns. Hilarious nun-sense. :smile: :wink:
 
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