Do you feel Welcome at Muppet Central?

[Twisted Tails]

In order to treat others with respect, we should be patient. The problem with newbies is that they don't know how to compromise with a mod or at least wait. I learned that maybe being patient is not so great, but I have to be respectful with everyone no matter how high their expectations are.

So let's "agree to disagree", but let's not just be serious, but also have fun.. This forum has changed a lot, but I have not got into threads that would get my posts deleted. So, I have to choose wisely, but my gosh there are times where I can't decide which thread to get into and post.

 

[Dominicboo1]

"Hey, everybody, let's attack the moderators, the very people who founded this website and keep it going!"

Listen, (and this has been said before) no matter where you go, not everyone's going to like you. You're never going to be loved by everyone. Some people just may have it out for you. I don't know why they would, but, you never know! I've gotten a few posts deleted and gotten into a few arguments with the member around here, but I grew up, forgave and forgot! Now, I'm not saying we should be going around blaming people, but this isn't all on the moderator's shoulders, either. Anyone can report any post and it'll get deleted. Most of the time, if you provide a reason. That means that any member at any time could report a post of yours and there'd be a (just a guess here) eighty percent chance of it being deleted!

Also, if you are being attacked and you feel threatened, then what the heck are you still doing here? That's like going into the same back alley that you've previously been mugged at three times already! If you feel threatened on a website, get off the computer and don't go back to that website! That's just common sense!

But it's not fair to have ALL of a person's posts removed. That's not right, and that's what a certian moderator did to another member.

 

[Slackbot]

A key part of fitting in and being welcome in any community is respect. Not only receiving it, but showing it for others.

When someone new enters a community, it's wise to spend a little time getting a feel for its culture. What may be acceptable behavior in one place is frowned upon in another. Newbies, learn the rules of the road. And if someone corrects you, don't blow it into a big deal. Chances are they are trying to help you, not call you out, but even if they come across as harsh you do yourself no favors by raising a stink. We all get irritated sometimes, and we all have to know when to lift our fingers from the keyboard and walk away before we say something stupid.

And one point I must make very firmly: do not abuse our staff. The Count is a long-standing, highly respected member of the community. He has been here nearly every day, squashing spam and dousing flames and doing everything he can to keep this board on an even keel, for years. He does this single-handedly, with next to no help from any of the others listed as staff. He ain't paid do do this either; he does it on his own time. He has earned our respect. Bashing him does not make you look mature. If you want to ask him what happened, you can simply send him a private message and ask in a calm and reasonable manner. That's what I did when I saw some of mine had vanished. I didn't freak, I simply asked if there was an issue with what I had posted. He responded that, no, it was just part of a thread that had to be pruned because it had wandered too far off topic. There: polite question, polite answer, no drama or hurt feelings.

By the way, one of the rules of the road I've seen violated fairly often is thread necromancy. Not to point fingers, but replying to a thread that's years old as if it's a current conversation is pretty pointless, and it's a classic newbie mistake. Please don't do this. Look at the dates of the posts to which you're replying.

 

[fuzzygobo]

Thank you, Kim. Private messages can be one of your best tools for settling matters with someone you may be disagreeing with.

If you decide to take matters public, where everybody can view the drama, it seems like you're encouraging the trouble to escalate, rather than finding a solution.

A lot of us have been bullied at one point or another in our lives. But there are more constructive ways to settle things than to take potshots at each other.
Remember.... it takes two to tango.

 

[scooterfan360]

whoa i had no idea that any of this was going,on .

 

[Drtooth]

And one point I must make very firmly: do not abuse our staff. The Count is a long-standing, highly respected member of the community. He has been here nearly every day, squashing spam and dousing flames and doing everything he can to keep this board on an even keel, for years. He does this single-handedly, with next to no help from any of the others listed as staff. He ain't paid do do this either; he does it on his own time. He has earned our respect. Bashing him does not make you look mature. If you want to ask him what happened, you can simply send him a private message and ask in a calm and reasonable manner. That's what I did when I saw some of mine had vanished. I didn't freak, I simply asked if there was an issue with what I had posted. He responded that, no, it was just part of a thread that had to be pruned because it had wandered too far off topic. There: polite question, polite answer, no drama or hurt feelings.

I've no doubt that it's a frustrating job to filter through all those inane spambots. Why, one day there was several spam threads just popping out of the woodwork, and The Count was unavailable to do anything about it. It is a thankless position, one that desperately requires assistance. I don't see how getting angry that he does have to thin out a couple threads before they get out of hand serves any purpose.

Then again, some of the senior members (myself included) do tend to get annoyed by some idiotic actions on this board. Posting one word responses, drudging up old threads... drudging up old threads to post one word responses....

 

[Mynameisdean]

I don't know, you guys are the judge.

 

[Pinkflower7783]

Wow this is a loaded thread. I'm just gonna be brutally honest here. I did not feel 100% welcome at all when I first joined because of two members and I'm pretty sure they know who they are. However like most people said they will remain unnamed. I really thought I made the biggest mistake joining here two years ago. Basically I feel like the members who have been here from the beginning liked to go out of their way to let new members know 'hey your a newbie, so don't expect to fit in.' But you gotta forgive and let go...and its taken me a long time but I have just learned that not everyone is gonna like you and your not gonna like them but the friends you make outweigh all that. And I don't regret at all not joining this place. I have made and met some wonderful friends here and I wouldnt change that for anything. I do feel like I've found my click here.

Also I'd like to add please don't take everything out on the mods they do work hard to keep this place going. So for them I wanna thank them.

As Jim says let's love and forgive everyone its a good life let's enjoy it.

 

[dwayne1115]

A key part of fitting in and being welcome in any community is respect. Not only receiving it, but showing it for others.

When someone new enters a community, it's wise to spend a little time getting a feel for its culture. What may be acceptable behavior in one place is frowned upon in another. Newbies, learn the rules of the road. And if someone corrects you, don't blow it into a big deal. Chances are they are trying to help you, not call you out, but even if they come across as harsh you do yourself no favors by raising a stink. We all get irritated sometimes, and we all have to know when to lift our fingers from the keyboard and walk away before we say something stupid.

And one point I must make very firmly: do not abuse our staff. The Count is a long-standing, highly respected member of the community. He has been here nearly every day, squashing spam and dousing flames and doing everything he can to keep this board on an even keel, for years. He does this single-handedly, with next to no help from any of the others listed as staff. He ain't paid do do this either; he does it on his own time. He has earned our respect. Bashing him does not make you look mature. If you want to ask him what happened, you can simply send him a private message and ask in a calm and reasonable manner. That's what I did when I saw some of mine had vanished. I didn't freak, I simply asked if there was an issue with what I had posted. He responded that, no, it was just part of a thread that had to be pruned because it had wandered too far off topic. There: polite question, polite answer, no drama or hurt feelings.

By the way, one of the rules of the road I've seen violated fairly often is thread necromancy. Not to point fingers, but replying to a thread that's years old as if it's a current conversation is pretty pointless, and it's a classic newbie mistake. Please don't do this. Look at the dates of the posts to which you're replying.

Ha!

The problem with most of what you have said here is that I have gone to bat countless times for some of the newer, and younger members in private messages, to have them get bullied even further or ignored. Speaking of private messages that is where most of the issues have happened. My original plan was to gather as much of the facts "Evidence" from as many different people who may have experienced any mistreatment. Then present my "case" to the administrator. Sadly, most of the folks who have been mistreated have left the conversations thus losing any proof that any of it has happened. So then you have the word of a new and young member vs, the word of a senior member or a mod, which is not fair at all. That was the whole reason I started this to give folks the chance to express how they feel.

I also find it funny how it seems perfectly OK for a Senior member or a Mod to treat the newer and younger members like dirt, but frog forbid someone question a senior or Mod's actions. Being a senior member myself I go out of my way to try and make the new and younger members feel welcome, and try and help them learn the "ways of the forum". That is something I think all senior members, and mods should do. Instead of bashing,bullying or mistreating them, and making them regret joining the forum all together.

 

[Pinkflower7783]

I do agree with that favoritism is played here. I had addressed an issue several times to one of the mods only to never have gotten a response and yes I know it was cause the so called members in question were well known here and therefore allowed to get away with more then members who hadn't been here as long. Sorry but I don't worship the ground people walk on no matter how WELL known they are. This is one of the reasons I stopped posting for a good while aside from having a baby and needing a break and considered deleting everything in my profile...but again the friends I had met here far out weigh the negative. I talk to many members outside this place which in some cases has been much better. But no forum is gonna be perfect and this one is far from it but in general MOST and mind you I said MOST people on here I have found are pretty welcoming. Another reason I decided not to leave was I wasn't gonna let two people feel like they had won over on me.

There's certain parts of the forum I will never post in for personal reasons and because of that definitely has made my time here more enjoyable. But I agree sometimes you gotta know when to just stop and go take a break and come back with a clean mind.

I have gotten into arguments with people on here no doubt so I am not innocent of everything. I'm only human I make mistakes but I do try hard now to think before I speak.

I'm not gonna post anymore on the issue as I don't want any one jumping on me although I might after posting this but like Dwayne said this is a good opportunity to lay it all out on the table. Jim accepted everyone regardless if he had just met them or had known them for years. We should all follow his example. Yes let new members know the rules but please think about how your addressing it. Because everyone was a newbie once too! Again so many things can come off wrong with words on a screen. This has been how some of my arguments have started. Just try and think of how your wording things before typing them.