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Jim Nabors - Episode 6
Dates: Week of June 8, 1976
GENERIC INTRO: KERMIT
Brian Henson: "Hi, I'm Brian Henson. How do you explain the success of The Muppet Show? Well there were certainly a lot of important factors: like the guest stars, the outrageous Muppet characters and some perfectly absurd stories and sketches."
"But at the center of all of it was Kermit. Kermit was my father. My father first made Kermit out of a coat that belonged to my grandmother and through the years Kermit changed a little bit, looked a little bit different. and eventually became the Kermit that we all know. But what's wonderful about Kermit is he's the glue that holds all of these crazy zany characters together. Here it is, The Muppet Show."
Fozzie's joke: "My cousin is so thin he paints his head gold and rents himself out as a flagpole."
Gonzo's gong: The gong part of the "O" is missing so Gonzo hits his head.
Kermit mentions the show is done at the Benny Vendergast Memorial Theater; since the Muppets owe everything (especially three months back rent) to Benny, Kermit presents Dr. Teeth with "Money"
OPENING NUMBER - "MONEY"
Dr. Teeth sings a "financially substantial" ode to the green stuff (the cash, not the frog!) while jamming at the piano. At the song's conclusion, Dr. Teeth pulls a handle and money comes pouring out of the organ a la a Las Vegas slot machine.
[This song was also performed during one of the Muppets' regular appearances in 1992 on Good Morning America during Income Tax Week as an IRS agent paid a visit to Fozzie.]
A young kid named Scooter introduces himself to Kermit as his new go-fer (he'll go fer coffee and sandwiches). Kermit declines to hire a youngster with no experience, especially with no money in the budget. Couldn't he just "hop on" Dr. Teeth's piano? Then Scooter mentions his uncle owns the theater.
Kermit gives a real Muppet Show welcome to guest Jim Nabors.
MUSICAL NUMBER - "GONE WITH THE WIND"
As Jim sings, a windstorm blows down the set around him, the wig off the girl he sings too, and whips away his pants. (At least Jim still managed to finish the song, where lesser singers like Wayne & Wanda wouldn't have made it past the first few lines!)
An interview with gas station attendant Billy Lee Boomer (Nabors), who was visited by inhabitants of a flying saucer. [The Newsman is starting to evolve; while he doesn't yet have glasses, his voice becomes more like the one we know today.]
Scooter starts to play Talent Coordinator as he persuades Kermit to put on the Danceros, his uncle's favorite act.
With "great pride and no little fear," Kermit brings on...
A close up of two pairs of legs pan back to reveal a large Muppaphone-ish quadrupled who gets his legs all tangled up.
Jim encourages Animal to break a leg, not something one wants to tell Animal to do!
Kermit unloads Scooter on George the janitor, who brags he's been with the theater. from the beginning and starts complaining about the new guy who bought it and ruined it. Once he realizes this kid is the owner's nephew, he quickly changes his tune.
[Notice that the headless Muppet walking off-stage is actually headed in the wrong direction for the next number, At the Dance.]
AT THE DANCE
Jokes include Rowlf's coming down with the Asian Flu; his doctor advised "take two fortune cookies and he'd call to call him in the morning".
UK SKIT: MUSICAL NUMBER - "DOG EAT DOG"
Rowlf and Baskerville sing.
[Jim Henson originally voiced baskerville in the Purina Dog Food commercials from the 1960s.]
Miss Piggy joins in, flirting with Jim. The topic turns to astrological signs. (Kermit: "Hey listen, I'm a Tauris...I'm a bull frog.") Jim demonstrates how he lives up to the double-personality aspects of the Gemini since he talks kind of goofy but sings more operatic. Kermit doesn't seem to appreciate his singing as much as Piggy does.
Fozzie complains to Kermit that the new kid keeps following him around giving him awful jokes for his act. The "terrible" jokes ("I stayed at a hotel so exclusive, room service had an unlisted number") manage to draw huge laughs out of the backstage crowd.
Sam introduces the world's "finest and most morally unobjectionable singing team".
WAYNE & WANDA - "INDIAN LOVE CALL"
Kermit introduces "the man who thinks Elton John is a singing bathroom"...
FOZZIE'S COMEDY SPOT
After repeated heckling from Statler & Waldorf, Fozzie promises that if they don't laugh at his best joke, he'll never come out on stage again. After the two old man double up in laughter, Fozzie announces he lied - the joke was actually his worst! (Probably true; it's the cannibal "that-was-no-lady, that-was-my-lunch" joke!)
Jim plays a night watchman at Benson's Bakery. Rowlf enters and puts up his hens: a couple of chickens. Jim's thick Southern accent keeps eliciting more misunderstanding, prompting Rowlf to bring in more animals.
Scooter tells Fozzie he thinks the bear's the greatest comedian there ever was. Inspired, Fozzie recites his latest joke: "Let me tell you about my nearsighted cousin, he's so rich his car is fitted with a prescription windshield." Scooter doesn't quite get it. ("Okay, tell me about him!")
Kermit brings on Jim Nabors.
CLOSING NUMBER - "THANK GOD I'M A COUNTRY BOY"
Backed by the Gogolala Jamboree Jug-band, Jim sings on a farm set to appreciative barnyard animals. [Much enthusiastic dancing from Baskerville the Hound.]
Jim tells Kermit how appreciative he was of Scooter, who picked up his coffee, his wardrobe, his accent... Kermit warns him to be careful of him picking up Jim's paycheck.