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FanFiction: THE MUPPETS GO VEGAS!

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction' started by HamHock, Aug 16, 2010.

  1. HamHock

    HamHock Well-Known Member

    Hey Everybody,

    I started writing a FanFic recently and I wanted to share it with you guys

    The plot is, the muppets are celebrating their five hundreth show and when leaving Kermit is face to face with an evil Las Vegas Hotel Owner who demands the muppets to perform there and do his every bidding. When Kermit refuses, the man tricks him into signing a contract which says the muppets have to perform ten shows in Vagas in one week. Kermit dosent think its so bad , but when he goes to tell the gang, he forgot... HE PROMISED THEM A VACATION! Now all the Muppets have to find each other and put a stop to the buisnessman once and for all!

    This is my first story so dont be too mean.

    And now, Muppet Central, I present to you:

    THE MUPPETS GO VEGAS
    By Ciaran Graham alias HamHock
    Part 1
    It was a special night at the Muppet Theatre. Everybody was celebrating. It was their five hundredth show. Everybody was at the top of their game tonight. Fozzie almost made it look like Statler and Waldorf had moved. Miss Piggy had done her most Divaish performance yet. And Gonzo broke his landing record, landing in the 13th row, on Mrs.Jillianovich. It reminded Kermit of the old days. The little green frog was at his desk checking the night’s schedule. He was about to take a sip from his mug when he found something you don’t want to find floating in your dragonfly diet urbal tea. Then again it’s not like the place was sane. Miss Piggy was chasing Animal after he ripped off her dressing room door, trying to smash him with her dresser. No, not dress, dresser. The Rats had strapped Zoot to the Chandelier, but he was to busy sleeping to notice. And if they weren’t rockin out on guitars or killing people with dressers, they were devouring everything in the canteen (If you ever come here NEVER go in peoples dressing rooms. The rats stuff it with Mashed Potatoes. Except Piggy’s, they are scared of her).When the show was over, everybody was partying backstage. The Electric Mayhem was blaring their classics, The Rats were swimming in the Champagne. Everybody was having a great time. Kermit went around, seeing how people liked the party.
    Fozzie: Hey Kermit, great party!
    Kermit: I’m glad you’re having a good time, Fozzie.
    Fozzie lead Kermit into a corner.
    Fozzie: Kermit, can you answer a question?
    Kermit: Sure.
    Fozzie: Promise you’ll tell me the truth. Frog to Bear.
    Kermit: I promise.
    Fozzie: Do you think I was funny tonight?
    Kermit hesitated.
    Kermit: Absolutely, You had your best performance tonight! Statler and Waldorf didn’t even heckle you once tonight!
    Fozzie: I thought they were sleeping. They had there eyes closed.
    Kermit: They were……. Trying to contain their laughter!
    Fozzie: Waldorf was snoring.
    Kermit: Hey, people have to let out air somehow.
    Fozzie: But Staler was
    Just then Piggy burst out of her dressing room, dressed in a long, Pink, Diamond studded gown (Think how much Fries she had to stop buying to afford THAT!). She walked elegantly down the stairs and floated towards me and Fozzie.
    Piggy: Hello, Kermie. Do you like my gown?
    Fozzie: Yeah, must have cost ya a lot to rent THAT!
    Piggy glared at him. Beat it, Hair Bear! Let us be alone!
    Fozzie: Yes sir.
    And with that Fozzie wandered off into the crowd.
    Kermit: So, your performance was
    Piggy: Dance? I would love to!
    Then she pulled him towards the blaring music of the Electric Mayhem.
     
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  2. HamHock

    HamHock Well-Known Member

    oops

    sorry, didnt mean to post it so small:o
     
  3. HamHock

    HamHock Well-Known Member

    Anyone want to comment? Its driving me nuts. Do they like, do they hate it, do they think its !GASP! (whispering) average! There is going to be a song in the next part and I want to post it within the next few days. Again, PLEASE comment!
     
  4. beakerboy12

    beakerboy12 Well-Known Member

    I definitely like it, it seems like a great plot! Will you include any post Henson characters in the story? But anyways, it is fantastic so far!:):D
     
  5. HamHock

    HamHock Well-Known Member

    Thanks so much for replying, beakerboy12 !

    In responce to your question, there will be a few post Henson characters. Pepe is featured in this part (briefly) . There will also be cameos including Bear from the Big Blue House and Super Grover!

    Just apologising in advance for the song. It kinda sucks. I couldnt find many words that rhyme with " Man ". Anywho, heres part 2:

    Part 2
    Miss Piggy was insistent on dancing. But she wasn’t going to do it to the Electric Mayhems music, which she referred to as “Gonzo stuffed down the toilet covered in horse food three years ago. And Gonzo smelled bad enough three years ago, without all that stuff added in. Piggy went up to the bands bass player, Floyd Pepper.
    Piggy: Hey, Salt.
    Floyd: It’s Pepper.
    Fozzie: I prefer Vinegar.
    Gonzo: I’m more of a salad dressing man, myself.
    Janice: I, like, rully enjoy organic salad, fur sure.
    Beauregard: I tried a diesel, once.
    Kermit: I think it’s a “Diet”, Beauregard.
    Animal: KETCHUP! KETCHUP!
    Piggy: WOULD YOU ALL SHUT YOUR TRAPS!
    Everyone stopped immediately.
    Piggy: Well that’s much better. Now, Salt
    Floyd: I told you, it’s Pepper!
    Piggy: PEPPER, SALTY, SPICY, SMOKIN, CRUNCHY, YUCKY, ICKY, CRISPY WITH A SIDE ORDER OF YUM-YUMS, IT DOSENT MATTER! NOW PLAY ME A SLOW SONG!
    Floyd: You got it Miss P.
    The band started to play a slow song for about ten seconds, but then stopped.
    Floyd: Hey Guys, why don’t we play a number for our favourite lil green jelly bean?
    Everybody: YEAH!
    The band started playing a cheesy but nice number, like one you would here on a cruise, telling you how great it is. Everybody started singing along.
    Floyd: Hey everybody lets all here it for our frog.
    Everybody: HOORAY!
    Fozzie: Who has somehow charmed a deadly lady hog.
    Gonzo: With all the heart that we can.
    Everybody: You are the Backstage Man!
    Rowlf: He has a heart that is so very, very true.
    Piggy: Think of our children they look just like me and you.
    Dr. Teeth: Think you could fix the dressing room fan?
    Everybody: Cause you’re our Backstage Man.
    In the darkness of the blue, your sunny smile keeps coming threw. When our reviews are really bad, you remind us of good times we had. With all the things that you can do, Backstage Man never say adieu.
    Newsman: here is a newsflash, Kermit the Frog is from a swamp
    Piggy: Yeah, I remember, I’ve been to that nature dump.
    Robin: There careers were blocked up like a dam.
    Everybody: But you saved us, Backstage Man!
    In the darkness of the blue, your sunny smile keeps coming threw. When our reviews are really bad, you remind us of good times we had. With all the things that you can do, Backstage Man never say adieu.
    Everybody: Backstage…
    Floyd: You fixed Animals cage
    Everybody: Backstage…
    Fozzie and Gonzo: Piggy barely goes in a rage.
    Everybody: Backstage…
    Pepe: We all want a raise, okay.
    In the darkness of the blue, your sunny smile keeps coming threw. When our reviews are really bad, you remind us of good times we had. With all the things that you can do, Backstage Man never say adieu
    In the darkness of the blue, your sunny smile keeps coming threw. When our reviews are really bad, you remind us of good times we had. With all the things that you can do, Backstage Man never say adieu!
    Kermit: Awww, Guys.
    Fozzie: No, Kermit. You deserve it. Cause we know, no matter what happens, you’ll always stick with us. No matter how many offers you get, no matter how many people try to persuade you
    Fozzie started crying.
    Kermit: Don’t worry, Fozzie, its okay.
    Fozzie: I’m sorry. I tear up when I talk about talent agents. There just so horrible
    Fozzie’s phone started to ring.
    Fozzie: Bernie, what ya got?
    Fozzie wandered off into the crowd, yet again.
    Later, everybody started to go back to the Boarding House. Kermit stayed behind to lock up. Just as he was closing the door he said “Thanks for all the great shows, girl. When he walked outside, he was face to face with a man who didn’t look good.
     
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  6. HamHock

    HamHock Well-Known Member

    Hey everybody,

    I just want to inform you guys that I have started a new sub-plot that has Rizzo and Pepe and will start in Part 5.

    Her is Part 3:

    Part 3
    The man was about 50, with a big bald spot in the centre of his head. He had a scrunchy nose, puffy cheeks, small beady eyes and a wide grin. He was wearing a tan suit, his shoulders ridden in dandruff.
    Stranger: Hello there, Mister the frog. Before I start anything, could I please have an autograph?
    Kermit: Uhhhh…… sure.
    The man handed Kermit a worn and dirty piece of paper. Kermit wrote his name and handed the man back the paper. The man stared at it like it was all he had ever wanted in his life.
    Kermit: Excuse me who are you?
    Stranger: Oh I’m sorry. How rude of me. I am Cornelius Stellia, Owner and Founder of the Stellia Hotels, in Vegas. And you, my little green friend, are my ticket to worldwide status.
    Kermit: I’m sorry, I don’t understand.
    Stellia: You and your little. things, are a worldwide phenomenon. Everybody wants to hire you.
    Kermit: Really, that’s funny. Because we haven’t had a single offer to perform somewhere else in months.
    Stellia: Yeah, that’s really funny.
    Stellia started shifting his eyes from left to right.
    Stellia: Anyway, my Hotel would get HUGE buzz if you and your friends came to perform for me. And the best part is, we can put ALL of the other hotels out of business. They would be out on the streets!
    Kermit: That’s Horrible!
    Stellia: I Know! Ill be RICH!
    Kermit: You are a HORRIBLE man, Stellia! You got NO DEAL!
    Stellia: Oh, don’t I!
    Stellia took out an old camera out of his pocket, unfolded the piece of paper Kermit had signed, and took a picture of it. The picture came out of the front, and he threw it on the ground in front of Kermit.
    Stellia: Goodbye, Mister the Frog. See you in Vegas.
    He turned around and walked out the ally. Kermit picked up the picture. He gasped at what he saw. In big letters was the word CONTRACT. On the piece of paper, it read:
    This contract states that whoever may sign it must perform 10shows at The Stellia Hotel located in the town/city of Las Vegasfor 1 week.. Failure to do so can and will result in the act The Muppetsbeing cancelled or be named “illegal”. In all countries of earth.
    Signed: Kermit The Frog.
    Kermit dropped the photo and ran to the boarding house. When he got there the sun had almost risen. When he opened the door he found what he least expected. Quiet. Complete Quiet. There were a whole bunch of sticky notes on the Fridge. They read things like:
    C ya in a week Kermit, Wocka Wocka Wocka !
    Later Kerm, see you in a week !
    BYE FROGGY! BYE FROGGY!
    Meet me at the airport at eight, Kermie. Kissie Kissie
    Kermit had forgotten. He had promised them all a vacation. They were all over the country.
    And they had 5 days to get to Vegas
     
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  7. beakerboy12

    beakerboy12 Well-Known Member

    **applause**

    I loved it! Can't wait to read more! Oh, and I'm now curious about the Rizzo/Pepe sub-plot! Oh, and will include any obscure Muppets! I'm just curious!
     
  8. HamHock

    HamHock Well-Known Member

    Hey guys,

    I will hopefully post Part 4 later. Beakerboy, you will see some obscure Muppets. There will be Emilie Bear (Fozzies Mom) and Seymour the Elephant from Muppets Tonight. Maybe a few others. Bobo will be in Vegas, maybe. There will also be an old friend from the Muppet Movie.
     
  9. HamHock

    HamHock Well-Known Member

    Hey,

    just posting to say Im going back to school tomorrow. Now I wont be able to post new parts or on these forums as often as I have been but I WILL STILL BE POSTING NEW PARTS!
     
  10. HamHock

    HamHock Well-Known Member

    Here is part 4:



    Part 4
    It was 8:22 and Miss Piggy was still at the airport. She was dressed in a huge Sunhat, bigger than her head, a Sunset dress with blue flowers, yellow heels with her long blonde hair in curls. She was leaning against her many hot pink suitcases, bags, travel cases, backpacks and crates. Her and Kermit’ flight was scheduled to take off in 8 minutes, and her luggage’s flight was meant to leave in 3 minutes. An employee came over with a big luggage cart.
    Employee: Do you need any help, Madame?
    Piggy: No I need no help sir! (Muttering) someone is looking for a tip.
    Piggy threw the bags and crates onto the cart in one go. It smashed under their weight.
    Piggy: Man, this place is cheap!

    Employee: What? This is the best Airport in the State!

    Piggy: Well, it’s cheap compared to what I buy!

    The employee went off to put the bags on the plane.

    Suddenly, Kermit came charging into the airport.

    Kermit: Piggy

    Piggy: FROG! YOU’RE 23 MINUTES LATE!

    Kermit told her about what happened.

    Piggy: Oh, no

    Kermit: I no! It’s terrible!

    Piggy: Not that! Look!

    Kermit looked behind him. There were 2 big beefy men in Tan suits that read The Stellia Hotel on the back of the jacket coming towards them.

    Man #1: Kermit The Frog and Miss Piggy?

    Piggy: IT WAS HIM! HE TOOK HER MAJESTYS DIAMOND!

    Man #2: Uhhh we just want to force you on a plane to Vegas so you can start your shows.

    Kermit: But it doesn’t start for 5 days! And there are only 2 of us!

    Man#1: Sorry. Stellia’s orders.

    Piggy: Kermie darling get on the plane.

    Kermit: Why? Aren’t you

    Piggy: HIIYAA!

    With a bounce off her heels, Piggy tackled the first man onto the ground. Before the second man could react, Piggy charged him in the gut. When the first Man got back up, Piggy gave him a kick in the shin, causing him to hop on his foot. The second Man tried to smack Piggy, but she gave him a punch in the jaw. Kermit took this as a good time to get on the plane. He pulled Piggy by her arm, with her screaming “LET ME AT THEM! I CAN TAKE EM! He ran in threw the doorway, Just as it closed.

    Piggy: Well shall we find our seats?
     
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  11. HamHock

    HamHock Well-Known Member

    Man, this thing died, didn't it? Might post next part later:p
     
  12. beakerboy12

    beakerboy12 Well-Known Member

    It's good HamHock but I've just been gone from MCF for a few days! I like it! Wonder where the others were planning on going?
     
  13. HamHock

    HamHock Well-Known Member

    Here is part 5: ( WARNING: Some Mickey Mouse fans may be upset if they read this chapter)



    Part 5
    Kermit told a more detailed tale of what happened with Stellia.
    Piggy: Oh, Kermie, I didn’t think you could be fooled by a man using the oldest trick in the book.
    Kermit: But
    Piggy: It’s alright. I forgive you
    Kermit: Yeah, well, how are we meant to find the gang?
    Piggy: Not even a genius like Moi could figure that out. They must be all over the world by now
    Fozzie was leaning against the side of the snack bar of an airport, slurping away on a milkshake. His flight back to his Mom’s farm had been delayed, so he had been waiting in the airport all morning. He was sad that he wasn’t going to see his friends for a while, but he hadn’t seen his Mom since Christmas. He hoped that they were going to have as much a fun time as he will. Kermit and Piggy were going to the Nelson resort off the coast of California. Gonzo was headed to Texas to take part in a Sky Diving Charity Event. The Electric Mayhem, Rowlf Scooter and Robin were going cruising around the Caribbean. Rizzo and Pepe were going to Disneyland for some reason or another. Fozzie didn’t think it was that suspicious. What’s the worst that could happen?
    Rizzo: Yes, I assure you, we are fully qualified.
    Rizzo and Pepe were standing in the middle of a cramped, stinky office. The last person anyone would guess was behind the desk.
    Mickey: I’m not sure.
    Yes, Mickey Mouse was behind the desk. He had dark stubble and bags under his eyes. He was wearing a faded sky blue suit with worn sneakers. After his directorial debut “The Life and Lies of Mr. Poochy and friends”, although featuring co-stars such as Winnie the Pooh and Steamboat Willie, failed to impress at the Box-Office, He had been demoted to “That guys who employs people”.
    Rizzo: What do you mean, Mr. Mouse?
    Mickey: Well, since when do you need qualifications to clean puke off the Tower of Terror?
    Pepe: But we have a nice picture, okay.
    Pepe showed Mickey a picture of a man with a green face and barf on the ground in front of him. In front of the man were Rizzo and Pepe with a Mop and Air freshener, putting the thumbs up to Mickey.
    Mickey: Charming.
    Rizzo: So? We got the job?
    Mickey: Sure, whatever. Close the door on your way out, will ya?
    Mickey went threw the doorway and slumped off down the hallway.
    Rizzo: Alright! Phase 1 Complete! Soon this park will be ours!
    The two friends wandered down the hallway, laughing to themselves.
     
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  14. HamHock

    HamHock Well-Known Member

    Part 6



    Piggy: Ahh, this belt is killing me!



    Kermit and Miss Piggy had been on the plane for about 15 minutes and she was already complaining. Her designer belt made her look shapely but made her complain more. She had been trying to rip it off for 5 minutes.



    Piggy: I will back in a moment, Kermie.



    Piggy undid her seatbelt and went for the ladies room. Kermit tried to relax by reading Swamp Monthly, but nothing would help. He could loose The Muppets. A thing he had been doing for so many years, to just disappear



    Piggy: KERMIE!



    Kermit jumped. He must have been out for awhile.



    Kermit: What?



    Piggy: Ummm how do I put this? I couldn’t get my belt off so I asked the Pilot to help. I finally got off but it hit him in the face. And now



    Kermit: Piggy!



    Piggy: He’s unconscious.



    Kermit almost fainted.



    Kermit: Oh No!



    Piggy I know. How will I get it back?

    Kermit: What?



    Piggy: My belt. It flew out the window and got caught on the wing.



    Kermit: What about the Pilot?



    Piggy: I stuck his head to his seat with tape. It won’t be long until it lets loose and his head hits the



    Kermit noticed the plane was getting lower and lower.



    Kermit: Controls!



    Kermit and Piggy ran for the control room. It was lowering and lowering every second. There was an airport below. If they didn’t stop it soon it would crash straight into it. The people were starting to become normal size. It would all be over soon.





    Fozzie: No, no, no. CHEESE!



    Fozzie was telling a joke to a foreign employee. He didn’t seem to understand it.



    Fozzie: GET IT? WOKKA WOKKA?



    Fozzie sighed and walked over to the window. Suddenly he saw something that made him jump out of his fur. Kermit and Miss Piggy were flying a plane right into the window. Fozzie yelled and jumped out of the way just as it smashed through the glass. When Kermit and Piggy recovered from shock they noticed Fozzie.



    Kermit: What the?



    Once all the passengers had dismounted the plane, Fozzie ran to the side of the plane after they had backed it up onto the runway. The Police were coming towards the plane, most likely to arrest them. Kermit remembered about Stellia and how he needed all the Muppets he could get.



    Kermit: FOZZIE! GRAB THE BELT ON THE WING!



    The Police had almost reached them now. Fozzie didn’t seem to understand.



    Police: HEY! BEAR!



    Kermit started the plane. It had about 10 seconds until lift-off. Fozzie ran for the wing, the cops right on his tail. He managed to grab the belt jut as the plane started going into the air. They flew off into the clouds, Kermit running to the door to let Fozzie in.
     
  15. HamHock

    HamHock Well-Known Member

    Part 7
    Fozzie: KKKKKEEEERRRRMMMIIIITTTTT!
    Fozzie didn’t seem to like hanging off a plane so they lowered it (so when they opened the door they wouldn’t fly out) opened the door and Kermit grabbed Fozzie’s hand. He managed to haul his buddy inside.
    Fozzie: Shouldn’t you guys be in California?
    Kermit told him about Stellia.
    Fozzie: Oh, No! How are we meant to find everybody else!
    Piggy: Boys! We have a situation!
    Kermit and Fozzie ran to the front of the Plane.
    Kermit: What is it?
    Piggy: You know what gas is?
    Kermit: Yeah.
    Piggy: Would you happen to have any?
    Suddenly, there was a loud fart.
    Fozzie: Did you miss it? Hang on, I think I got some more coming.
    Piggy: Stop it, fur ball!
    Fozzie: Yes Sir!
    Kermit: What state are we in?
    Fozzie: By now? Probably Texas. Why?
    Kermit: It’s just not where I pictured dying.
    Kermit looked at Piggy.
    Kermit: Although, the same person is the cause of it.
    An alarm started whirring. The dashboard read “Unless you want to explode, GET OUT!”
    Rizzo: Sweet Gig, huh?
    Rizzo and Pepe were cleaning up puke on The Twilight Zone Tower of Terror. It wasn’t the scariest ride the two pals had been on, but it was the scariest sight afterwards.
    Pepe: If it getz ze ladies zen itz worth zit, okay.
    Rizzo: Even sweeter when we are known as the guys who took DisneyLand down from the inside!
    Pepe: I don’tz knowz. I hlike my ladies.
    Rizzo: Just finish Phase 2!
    Pepe went over to the screen and undid the stabilisers on it with a screwdriver. He and Rizzo both left the ride. As they were walking away, the tower started to crumble, floor by floor, until there was nothing but an acre of rubble.
    Kermit, Miss Piggy and Fozzie were all running around and screaming. Kermit stopped them.
    Kermit: I suggest we GET OUT!
    The three ran for the door and crashed into each other as they went tumbling down into the sky.
    Dr. Teeth was sunbathing on the main deck, sipping on a crusin cranberry smoothie. Floyd lay in the chair next to him, strumming on his bass. Zoot tripped on the deck about 45 minutes ago and wasn’t bothered to get up so, fell asleep on the floor. Janice was talking to Scooter by the bar. Robin was playing with his toys in his cabin. Rowlf was playing the piano over by the Bar. Animal was attached to the front of the ship (that’s why they got the cruise so cheap. They got Animal to move the boat)
    Dr. Teeth: Hey, Floyd, my main man?
    Floyd: Yessiree, Dr. T?
    Dr. Teeth: Did you know the Sunny days are playing in Las Vegas?
    Animal: Vegas?
    Floyd: No, Animal, NO!
    Animal: SUNNY DAYS! SUNNY DAYS!
    Everyone fell back and hit the deck as Animal took off towards Land.
    The three friends were screaming their heads off. They didn’t know what else to do. Soon they would be in their watery graves. Or Earthy graves. They were too scared to look. They all flailed their arms about with their eyes closed, trying to grasp each other for one last moment. Then their hands all found something and held it tightly. But it didn’t feel like a hand. Or an arm. More like a
    A Foot.
    Gonzo: Guys?
    Kermit, Piggy and Fozzie looked up to see their weird-nosed friend wearing a skin-tight, bright green leotard, a parachute strapped to his back.
    Gonzo: So? How was California?
    Piggy: JUST GET US BACK ON THE GROUND, BUZARD BEAK!
    Gonzo: Sure.
    Gonzo pulled on his parachute and it opened, letting the friends float to the ground. But, there was a sudden gust of wind and the Muppets screamed as they crashed into a hill. They all tumbled down it, Kermit hitting his head off a rock at the bottom, being knocked unconscious as he heard his friends calling his name.
     
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  16. HamHock

    HamHock Well-Known Member

    Well, I think I've kept you waiting long enough

    Part 8
    It was sunrise by the time Kermit woke up. He awoke to a strange noise above him. It sounded like someone was sniffing him. Kermit opened his eyes to see a big orange bear with a shiny blue nose and beady black eyes sniffing him, inches from his face.
    Bear: (sniff) (sniff) (sniff) ITS YOU!
    Kermit: AAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!
    Kermit jumped up in fear and ran up the hill. In a tree to his right, two purple otters jumped out at him, in capes.
    Pip and Pop: Ve vant to suck your blood!
    Kermit: You guy gotta help me, theres a giant BEAR after me!
    Piggy: Kermie?
    Kermit ran up to the top of the hill, out of sight.
    Bear: Hmmm I guess he didn’t want to stay at the Big Blue House for a while. Oh, well.
    Bear strolled back down the path with Pip and Pop, back to the Big Blue House.
    When Kermit reached the top of the hill his friends greeted him.
    Piggy: KERMIE! WE WERE SO WORRIED ABOUT YOU!
    After lots of kisses, Kermit, Fozzie, Miss Piggy and Now Gonzo, dressed in a snazzy sweater vest and jeans set off down Hill.
    After a few hours of walking (Which Piggy was not happy about) the friends came to a sign which read “Emilie Bears Farm”
    Fozzie: THE FARM! We can borrow my Mom’s car and get to Vegas Tonight!
    Fozzie, Piggy and Gonzo started walking but they noticed Kermit wasn’t there. They looked back to see him sitting on a rock.
    Piggy: Kermie? Whats wrong?
    Kermit: I’m sorry. I’m sorry I got you guys into this mess. I guess theres nothing good about me. Well, besides my good looks.
    Fozzie: Kermit, that’s not true! Everything that’s good about the world is in you.
    Gonzo: We will SHOW you!
    Gonzo started clicking his fingers and Fozzie started singing.
    Fozzie: There are some bad things about these kind of places.
    Piggy: The Bugs, the Spiders and they got no Macy’s
    Fozzie: But you and I know that everythings got a good side. Yes nothin’s goodness can hide.
    Gonzo: The Worlds a good place
    Fozzie: Ya know it from ya toes to ya head
    Gonzo: Just remember what your old pals said!
    Fozzie: Lifes got its highs and, life got its lows
    Gonzo and Fozzie: But everybody knows, that’s the good of the world and the good of the world is in ya.
    Piggy: I love you Kermie, No matter what you have done. As long as you and I, we have lots of fun.
    Fozzie: Everythings nice and everythings mean. What do ya think?
    Kermit: I think you’re overly keen
    . Gonzo: The Worlds a good place
    Fozzie: Ya know it from ya toes to ya head
    Gonzo: Just remember what your old pals said!
    Fozzie: Lifes got its highs and, life got its lows
    Gonzo and Fozzie: But everybody knows, that’s the good of the world and the good of the world is in ya
    Gonzo: The Worlds a good place
    Fozzie: Ya know it from ya toes to ya head
    Gonzo: Just remember what your old pals said!
    Fozzie: Lifes got its highs and, life got its lows
    Gonzo and Fozzie: But everybody knows, that’s the good of the world and the good of the world is in ya
    Fozzie: Well Kermit? What do ya think?
    Kermit: I think I think we are going to Vegas tonight!
    All: Yeah!
    The four friends walked down the path, heading to the farm. Little did they know they would be seeing an old friend or two.


    Happy Halloween, everybody:batty::scary::batty:
     
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  17. HamHock

    HamHock Well-Known Member

    Part 9
    Floyd: I totally did NOT dig that, man!
    The guys on the cruise were lying in a ship wreck. Literally. They had crashed in the NevadaDesert about 5 miles from Vegas. Animal had ran straight onto land, cutting across the highways at 60 miles per hour, dragging the ship at the same speed. They had been there all day. An old friend would save them soon.
    Mickey Mouse was tied to a chair with his mouth gagged in his office. Rizzo and Pepe were sitting on his desk. Rizzo was on the phone.
    Rizzo: and 75 20” Mickey Mouse Balloons, 1000 Mickey Mouse action figures and half a million Mickey Mouse Cheeseburgers. No, that last one goes to his office, for his two best employees, Spears and Perry.
    Pepe: (whispering) I told hyou zose codenames hwould hwork, okay.
    Rizzo: Shhh! Yeah, I’m still here. Oh, and through in a 10 storey high Mickey Mouse Statue and a Mickey Mouse Skyscraper. Yes, put it on Mr. Mouse’s credit card.
    Rizzo Hung up the Phone.
    Rizzo: Phase 3 complete!





    Fozzie: There it is. The old farm.
    The four Muppets walked up the path to the house. Fozzie knocked on the door.
    Emilie Bear answered the door. The sweet old Lady was wearing a floral dress under an apron with fuzzy slippers. Her Silver hair was pulled back in a bun.
    Emilie: Fozzie! I thought you were coming yesterday! And you brought your Lizard!
    After a quick lesson about the difference between Frogs and Lizards, Emilie turned to Piggy.
    Emilie: Fozzie?
    Fozzie: Yeah Mom?
    Emilie: What did I tell you about dressing up things in the barn?
    One angry pig later, she turned to Gonzo.
    Emilie: THE MUTANT TURKEYS OUT! BACK! BACK!
    Fozzie: Mom, where are your glasses?
    Emilie: Oops! I forgot them!
    Fozzie: Have you been taking your meds?
    Emilie: Maybe. Come in.
    After Emilie took her meds, she made them tea. It was now sunset.
    Emilie: So you need a car?
    Fozzie: Yeah. Can we use yours?
    Emilie: Oh, I’m sorry, darling. Mine is at the chop shop. But you could use the
    Fozzie: Wait, Mom! I want it to be a surprise!
    Piggy: I don’t care what it is, as long as I get to change out of these clothes.
    Emilie: Oh! I think I have some things from when I was a hot young thang.
    Emilie pulled Miss Piggy up the stairs as Kermit, Gonzo and Fozzie finished their tea.
    With some difficulty, Miss Piggy was now dressed in a tight blue sweater and a small blue skirt, all covered in a long blue and silver coat.
    Piggy: Not bad.
    Emilie: So, you like the frog?
    Piggy gasped.
    Piggy: How do you know?
    Emilie: I saw the way you were eying him. But I think he doesn’t like you the same way.
    Piggy: Why?
    Emilie chuckled
    Emilie: Its like me and Fozzie’s dad all over again. I liked him, he didn’t like me.
    Piggy: Then how did you get married?
    Emilie: One word: Tequila. And lots of it.
    Piggy: Tequila wouldn’t last that long.
    Emilie: Only the brand in Arizona. Anyway, I learned the only way to get someone to love you is don’t. If they don’t like you, it’s not meant to be. But
    Emilie leaned in further to Piggy.
    Emilie: You are going to Vegas. The town of fake love. Think about it.
    Emilie left the room.
    Fozzie pulled open the garage door and flicked on the lights. There was a shape of a car covered by sheets. He and Kermit walked in.
    Fozzie: Your gonna love this!
    Fozzie pulled off the sheets. Kermit gasped at what he saw.
    In the middle of the garage was an old car with peeling paint. It was mostly back to its original murky brown colouring, but there were still little areas of the remains of rainbows and bubbles.
    Kermit: The Studebaker.
    Kermit couldn’t believe his old friend was in the same garage as he was now.
    Kermit: I thought we traded this in years ago!
    Fozzie: I bought it back! I traded back in the other car for it. I haven’t been able to restore it since I moved out, but
    Kermit: It looks great! Does it still work?
    Fozzie picked up a set of keys from the counter, opened the car door and but the keys in. The engine started revving.
    Fozzie: It works!
    Kermit looked around.
    Kermit: Where is Gonzo?
    Gonzo: Hey Guys! I found some transport.
    They turned around to sea Gonzo with a giant cow.
    Kermit: Gonzo!
    Gonzo: Fine. Ill go put it back.
     
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  18. HamHock

    HamHock Well-Known Member

    Part 10

    Elmo: Sorry, Elmo doesn’t know where Vegas is.
    Kermit, Fozzie, Miss Piggy and Gonzo were in the Studebaker asking for directions from a certain furry red monster.
    Fozzie: You don’t! What kind of roadside pedestrian who gives directions are you? You should get another job!
    Elmo: Oh, Elmo doesn’t have a job. Elmo is on vacation helping the homeless with there ABC’s and
    Fozzie: Yeah, that’s great.
    Fozzie started the engine and drove off.
    The Muppets were now in Utah after a day of driving. It was now night time. They needed a place to stay the night. Something caught Fozzie’s eye.
    Fozzie: Kermit? Gonzo?
    Kermit and Gonzo: Yeah?
    Fozzie: You know what I said when I first saw The Happiness Hotel?
    Gonzo: Yeah. Why?
    Fozzie: I think I started a running gag.
    Fozzie was right. Across the street was a Hotel with the words “The Sadness Hotel”
    Written across the door.
    Fozzie: Suddenly, I want to sleep in the car.
    All the Muppets agreed and they lay down in the old car.
    Man: I can’t believe this!
    The executive of Disneyland (we will call him Roger) was standing in Mickey Mouse’s office.
    Roger: You order a dozen products of yourself and send it to the park. We had no room, so we had to destroy the rides to make room!
    Mickey: It wasn’t me! It was those cleaners, Rizzo and Pepe!
    Roger: I only know Spears and Perry!
    Rizzo: You called?
    Roger: You know what? YOU’RE FIRED!
    And, I’m taking away your rights for Disneyland!
    Mickey: WHAT! BUT WHO WILL MANAGE ALL THE PARKS?
    Roger: Uhhhh. Spears and Perry! Yeah! They’ll do it!
    Rizzo: Phase 4 complete!
    It was sunset and the Muppets were in Nevada, about a mile from Vegas. They were in the famous desert. They didn’t know if it was wise to drive in the desert but, what the hey? They could see the tops of Vegas now. Soon they would be living it up in casinos, meeting celebrities and
    Robin: UNCLE KERMIT!
    The Frog looked out the window to see the Electric Mayhem, Scooter, Rowlf and his little frog nephew waving their hands desperately in the air, calling his name.
    When the guys from the cruise explained what had happened and Kermit told them about Stellia, Fozzie called:
    Fozzie: WE ARE IN LAS VEGAS, BABY!
    Everybody cheered as they started driving down the street with the neon sign “WELCOME TO LAS VEGAS” glowing above them. It was official. The Muppets were in Vegas.
     
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  19. HamHock

    HamHock Well-Known Member

    Part 11
    Rizzo: WHAT? VEGAS?
    Rizzo and Pepe were sitting at two desks in a fancy executive office on the top floor of the Mickey Mouse shaped sky scraper. Rizzo was on the phone with Scooter, who was saying the Muppets were in Vegas, going to stop an evil business man who had tricked Kermit.
    Rizzo: So, he tricks the Frog and you want him arrested?
    Scooter: It’s not just that Rizzo. It’s look, we need all the gang we can get.
    Rizzo: (Sigh) Look, me and Pepe will be there tonight, okay!
    Scooter: Thanks Rizzo!
    Rizzo: Yeah, Yeah, Yeah.
    Rizzo hung up just as Roger came in the door with a pile of paper work, but Rizzo and Pepe were to busy to notice.
    Roger: Well, since Mr. Mouse was to lazy a rights owner, you are now in full position of the profits of all the parks.
    Rizzo: Whats are first order of business?
    Pepe: Hwhat are zose, brochures? Because I don’t hlike to hread, okay.
    Roger: Actually, it’s the debts
    Rizzo: WHAT! BUT THESE ARE THE MOST FAMOUS PARKS IN THE WORLD! HOW CAN THEY BE IN DEBT?
    Roger: Well, from building the rides, hotels and ordering endless products to sell. I mean, Disneyland Paris is over 2 Billion Euro in debt, alone. So what are you going to do about it?
    Rizzo and Pepe looked at each other.
    Within minutes they were up in the helicopter with the giant Mickey Mouse statue attached to the bottom and flying away to Vegas at full speed, leaving Roger standing on the roof of the skyscraper, holding all the heavy paper work.
    The Muppets were driving down the streets of Vegas, looking awestruck at the big flashing signs and sparkly casinos and hotels. It was amazing they could all fit in the tiny Studebaker, although Animal, Zoot and Dr. Teeth were on the roof of the car.
    Dr. Teeth: Say, have we ever written a song about Las Vegas, guys?
    Floyd: Can’t recall.
    Janice: Well, like, why don’t we write one now? And a rully good one, fur sure.
    Dr. Teeth: Anybody got some Maracas on em?
    Piggy: Oh, hang on.
    Piggy reached into her bottomless purse and took out a set of Maracas, passed them to Scooter, who passed them to Janice, who stuck them out the window. A second later, Dr. Teeth’s long green arm came down and took them up onto the roof. He started shaking them making a samba-like rhythm.
    Dr. Teeth: Come on everybody, sing, I want to hear your voices, voices!
    Janice: Yeah, everybody, sing, yes lets all make some noises, noises!
    Everybody: Yes, it’s Las Vegas! It’s the town where troubles fly away.
    Vegas! It’s the place where dreams are here to stay.
    Lets all go to Vegas, Vegas, You can leave it up to chance!
    Got to go to Vegas, Vegas!
    Zoot: I think I ripped my pants…
    Everybody:… His pants, yes!
    Gotta be Las Vegas, Vegas. It’s the town of romance, romance!
    Gotta be Las Vegas, Vegas Ohhhh, won’t you come and dance!
    Fozzie: Look at all those flashing lights, look are you able to see those, see those!
    Floyd: Can you dig this fancy town, dudes, can you see those casinos, casinos!
    Everybody: Yes, it’s Las Vegas! It’s the town where troubles fly away.

    Vegas! It’s the place where dreams are here to stay.
    Lets all go to Vegas, Vegas, You can leave it up to chance!
    Got to go to Vegas, Vegas!
    Zoot: No, really I ripped my pants…
    Everybody:… His pants, yes!
    Gotta be Las Vegas, Vegas. It’s the town of romance, romance!
    Gotta be Las Vegas, Vegas Ohhhh, won’t you come and dance!
    Everybody: Yes, it’s Las Vegas! It’s the town where troubles fly away.
    Vegas! It’s the place where dreams are here to stay.
    Lets all go to Vegas, Vegas, You can. Leave it all up to chance!
    Got to go to Vegas, Vegas!
    Zoot: I think I need new pants…
    Everybody:… His pants, yes!
    Gotta be Las Vegas, Vegas. It’s the town of romance, romance!
    Gotta be Las Vegas, Vegas Ohhhh, won’t you come and dance!
    Scooter: There it is. The Stellia Hotel.
    The Muppets were looking up at a 30 floor high casino and hotel, the words “The Stellia Hotel” written in ten storey high swirly letters. There were men and women flooding in and out the doors either cheering or cursing under their breath.
    The Muppets decided they would stay at the Love hotel, down the street from Stellia’s.
    Once the Muppets had booked 7 rooms, they went up to Kermit and Piggy’s room. They were all very cramped, but they could just barely fit all of them.
    Kermit: Ok, gang. We need to come up with a plan.
    Robin: To do what, Uncle Kermit?
    Kermit: To bust into that hotel and go up against Stellia!
    Janice: Don’t we need, like, lots of cool gizmos for that?
    Kermit: Uhhhnot necessarily. If we put our heads together, we can do anything. So. Anyone against?
    There was a short pause. Then the room erupted into noise.
    Scooter: Are you serious?
    Dr. Teeth: We would get killed!
    Everyone kept blabbing on. Until
    Fozzie: QUIET!
    Everybody stopped except Janice.
    Janice: And she’s all “Why don’t you want a car? Everybody else your age wants one! Why can’t you be normal?” And I’m all “But Mother, Cars are bad for our life span!” Because, like, life is short enough without
    She realised no one else was talking
    Janice: Oh.
    There was a knock at the door. Scooter answered it.
    Seymour: Excuse me, but you are disturbing the GUYS!
    Seymour the Elephant was standing in the doorway. His big behind took up the whole door frame.
    Everyone: SEYMOUR!
    Seymour: What are you doing here? Where is Pepe?
    Kermit explained about Stellia shutting down The Muppets.
    Seymour; Oh, that’s terrible!
    Gonzo: That’s why we need a plan.
    The group spend the next few hours coming up with a plan.
    Miss Piggy was in her hotel room, getting ready for the break-in. She had opted for black. All the Muppets did. Except the ones that didn’t wear clothes. Seymour told them they needed to sign the check in slip left in the room. She found it over by the brochures. They read stuff like “CHEAP CASINOS”, “FREE POOL”, “ROOM SLIP” Oh, there it is!
    Piggy got a pen and signed her name at the bottom. She read the slip out loud:
    You have ordered the luxury suite from The Love Hotel, with full romance package. Your Romance Package includes:
    Bouquet of fresh Roses by your bedside every day
    Free Cheese cake at the bar
    Legal Marriage license (Marriage included)
    First song at karaoke on Wednesdays and Sundays.
    Pretty good package, she thought. Then she saw the bit about the free Marriage.
    Piggy couldn’t believe her luck! Maybe she could forge Kermit’s signature!
    Wait.
    Kermit. She had to think of her frog’s feelings, too. It would be wrong to do this.
    She placed it back on the table and signed the customary check in slip.
    Kermit walked in the room.
    Kermit: The gang are waiting in the lobby. Are you ready?
    Piggy: Yes. Just sign the check in slip on the table.
    Piggy went over to the counter to grab her purse when she heard a small squirt.
    Roger dropped the paper work on the Pepe’s desk.
    The ink had exploded on the page Kermit was about to sign.
    Piggy: Hang on, Ill clean it up!
    Piggy ran into the bathroom and grabbed some uncomfortable toilet paper.
    Kermit: Hang on, I think I found another slip!
    Piggy: Ok.
    Piggy walked out of the bathroom and saw Kermit opening the door.
    Kermit: I signed it. Let’s go!
    Kermit walked out the door. Piggy saw the slip Kermit signed. But it was the wrong slip. He had signed the Marriage slip. It had her signature on it, too.
    She and Kermit were married.
    Man, Vegas is Wacky!
     
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  20. HamHock

    HamHock Well-Known Member

    Part 12
    The Muppets were walking towards the Stellia Hotel. It was almost Midnight. All the gang they had in total were Kermit, Fozzie, Miss Piggy, Gonzo, Dr. Teeth, Floyd, Janice, Zoot, Animal, Scooter, Rowlf, Robin and Seymour. Rizzo and Pepe would show up soon. They hoped.
    Kermit: Ok. The first floor is the casino. The next dozen floors are hotel rooms and the top floor is Stellia’s penthouse. You know what to do guys. Go!
    The Muppets entered the Casino. There was every betting game known to man. There was slot machines, roulette, card dealers, everything.
    Kermit: All right, Rowlf. You’re on!
    Rowlf was dressed as a standard security guard. He walked up to the two beefy guards blocking the employee elevator.
    Rowlf: Gentlemen, I believe I saw a mangy mutt on the complete other side of the Casino, far, far away from where we are standing.
    Guard: But, you’re a dog.
    Rowlf looked over at Kermit. Rowlf shrugged his shoulders. He looked at the guards and ran away screaming. The guards chased after him, letting The Muppets go into the elevator. Since they didn’t have an employee card, they could only go up to floor 16, one of the hotel room floors.
    When the elevator door opened, The Muppets stepped out. They peeked out the corner wall and saw a bunch of guards at the end of the hall.
    Kermit: Dr. Teeth. You and the guys are on.
    Dr. Teeth: You got it, green stuff!
    The Electric Mayhem took out their instruments. Floyd, Janice and Zoot had their normal instruments, Dr. Teeth had a small Keyboard around his neck, and Animal had a pair of symbols.
    They started blasting “Tenderly”. It rang down all the halls. Guests came out in their pyjamas. All the guests started crowding the guards, complaining. The band came running down the hall. The guests and guards tackled them. The Muppets ran to an employee door. You needed a Key card to open the door. Kermit saw Animal running down the hall with a Guard’s Key Card in his mouth. He dropped it in Kermit’s hand.
    Kermit: Thanks, Animal!
    Animal: I Stay?
    Kermit: Okay, go beat up the guards.
    Animal ran back down the hall.
    Kermit: Scooter, make sure the band gets out in one piece, and then find Rowlf.
    Scooter: You got it.
    Scooter ran down the hall to the bands aid. The remaining Muppets, Kermit, Piggy, Fozzie, Gonzo, Robin and Seymour, went up in the elevator to the 29th floor.
    As The Muppets came out of the elevator, they saw this was no ordinary floor. The walls were steel, the floor they stood on a cold metal. The corridor seemed to stretch on forever. The walls had no windows.
    The Muppets walked down the corridor, their feet making a squelching noise on the cold floor, Piggy’s heels making a clicking noise. They walked for a few minutes. Until
    Seymour: GUARDS!
    The Muppets turned and saw a hoard of Guards coming their way.
    They all turned and ran as fast as they could. Robin almost tripped, so Fozzie cupped him in his hand, and continued running.
    Seymour was a bit behind the rest of them. The guards could almost reach him.
    Seymour: KERMIT!
    Kermit looked at Seymour.
    Seymour: GET TO STELLIA!
    Seymour stopped running and turned to face the hoard of guards. He yelled as they all ran into him, making a huge pile up in the narrow corridor.
    Kermit: SEYMOUR!
    The Muppets got to the end of the corridor a moment later and ran up the flight of stairs to the top and final floor.
     
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