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The Accident, The Guilt, The Confession and The Revival...

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction' started by miss kermie, Sep 13, 2012.

  1. miss kermie

    miss kermie Well-Known Member

    So... I drew... stuff... And got this idea... For a story... Yeah...
    I rate this story as PG-13 due to slight violence.
    All I'm sayin'.
    OK! HERE WE GO!!!

    Miss Piggy got up in the morning feeling awful. And if anyone knew Miss Piggy, they'd know that if she woke up on the wrong side of the bed, you could say everyone else did too.
    But, nevertheless, she got up, trying her best to put a smile on her face.

    She showed up to breakfast, and everyone said their goodmornings.
    No one noticed how unusually quiet she was.
    Kermit came down a few minutes after she did.
    "Good morning Miss Piggy." Kermit then kissed her on the cheek.
    That was the first smile Piggy gave off.
    "C'mon guys, I don't want to lose my appitite before I eat my donut!" Jaz chuckled.
    Piggy's second smile occured. So, her morning was going alright.
    That was at least until Rowlf brought in some devestating tabloids.
    He pulled Kermit aside, and whispered something to him, which only made Kermit frown, and calmly get up to go upstairs.
    Piggy wondered what the problem was, so she followed him upstairs.
    As Piggy wandered upstairs, she heard depressing sighs.
    What could be the problem?

    Ok, so... yeah. This is what I will put for now.
    LizAngie and Muppetfan44 like this.
  2. Hubert

    Hubert Well-Known Member

    What is this? Start a story in five minutes before we go to the movies?

    But yeah...I've been staying off the fanfic part of this forum recently for the most part (just haven't felt like reading lately), but seeing one titled the way it is just intrigued me.

    It's hard for me to really give a hardcore review of this, as there really isn't much here, but I will say that it is an interesting start. I am intrigued to see the accident, the guilt, the confession, and the revival all play out...whatever those our. For some reason the sentence with Rowlf stuck out to me. Dunno why.

    As for nitpicks: For some reason this is just feeling so choppy that it makes me cringe...like we're switching from idea to idea so fast that it doesn't have time to think. However I'm sort of assuming that this was the desired effect, and if that is the case, you did it brilliantly.

    The only other thing is that the "what could be the problem?" line made me cringe a little...for some reason I feel like the fourth wall is being broken by the narration in a way it shouldn't be...maybe it's just me though...

    But overall, it was good. I'll be looking for another awesome line (i.e. the gut line) in this one...so you better deliver.
    muppetfan24/7 and miss kermie like this.
  3. Animal'sBunny

    Animal'sBunny Active Member

    Ooooohhhhhhh! This looks good! Don't leave me hanging for too long!!!! :D
  4. miss kermie

    miss kermie Well-Known Member

    What are you talking about?
  5. muppetfan24/7

    muppetfan24/7 Well-Known Member

    Oh wow! This story brings so much tension and mystery. Oh boy, I want more please.
    GopherCoffee likes this.
  6. Hubert

    Hubert Well-Known Member

    The short amount you wrote.
  7. miss kermie

    miss kermie Well-Known Member

    Chappie Duo!

    Piggy crept down the hallway, and cracked open the door.
    "Kermie...? Are you alright?" Piggy asked softly.
    No answer.
    Kermit didn't look very happy. In fact he just looked straight up upset.
    "I can't believe you'd do this to me Piggy."
    Puzzled was her expression. Piggy has committed a crime... In hours...
    What could she have done this time? Stolen a car? Injured someone...? Either way, she was sure to get away with it. "Kermie, what are you talking about?"
    "You! Cheating on me with Link! Of all people!" Kermit flailed his arms as he usually did in times of upset.
    Piggy, as you know, takes this kind of thing into offense. Accusations, do NOT go unpunished under any curcumstances. ... At least with Miss Piggy.
    "I don't think I appriciate your tone frog..." Piggy growled.
    Kermit, who was still upset over something that was most likely some poor attempt to make him mad, simply waved her off.
    Waved PIGGY off.
    "Frog, don't mess with me. Are you messing with me?" Piggy asked.
    "Do I look like I'm joking?" Kermit asked.
    "No, but you are jumping to conclusions!"
    "There were pictures, that's proof enough!"
    "Haven't you heard of photoshopping?"
    "Get out of my face!"
    The last thing Kermit said to her, really messed with her brain. It was so terrible of him too say. She was so mad... So very very mad...

    "NO! YOU GET OUT!!!" Piggy was so upset that she pushed Kermit out of a three story window. When she realized what she had done, she rushed outside.
    "Kermie!? Kermie, speak to Moi! I didn't mean to do that..."
    Kermit's head was bleeding. Piggy had no doubt he was gone.
    No doubt.
    "I-It was an accident..."
    LizAngie likes this.
  8. muppetfan24/7

    muppetfan24/7 Well-Known Member

    Oh no! Not her Kermie! Jaz! Oh JAZZZZ! I am shocked....oh my gosh! More updates please!
    GopherCoffee likes this.
  9. Animal'sBunny

    Animal'sBunny Active Member

    AHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!! :eek:WHAT HAPPENS NEXT??????? I NEED TO KNOW!!!!!! KERMIE... Kermit... CAN'T... DIE (can he???:confused:) This is great, by the way :)
    GopherCoffee and miss kermie like this.
  10. miss kermie

    miss kermie Well-Known Member

    Piggy ran back into Kermit's room. Not calling any police. Not telling Fozzie. Not even telling Jaz.
    If she called the police, they'd ask how it happened.
    If she told Fozzie, he'd panic, burst in tears, and call the police.
    Jaz however, wouldn't tell anyone.
    But she wouldn't let Piggy live it down.
    It's something she inherited from her real mother.
    So there was no way out of it. Piggy had to lay low while the body was still undiscovered.
    But how? Everyone knows she went upstairs to check up on him. And everyone knows she has a temper. And EVERYONE knows that her temper make her do stupid things like that.
    Piggy had a plan however.

    Piggy went downstairs casually.
    "Is Kermit alright?" Fozzie asked.
    "Wha-? Oh, yes, Kermie's alright. He went to sleep. I worked out his problems..."
    Jaz leaned her head on Fozzie's shoulder, and wondered why her nervous laugh had kicked in. If everything was alright, why was she so nervous. Maybe they broke up...

    Piggy smiled and quickly ran upstairs. Jaz however, took Fozzie upstairs with her.

    Sorry it was short and rushed, but it's late, and I'm sleepy...
    LizAngie likes this.
  11. Animal'sBunny

    Animal'sBunny Active Member

    Lovin' it!!!!!!!!!!:)
  12. Animal'sBunny

    Animal'sBunny Active Member

    Miss Kermie????? :confused: Don't let this story die a horrible, tragic death like Kermit!!!!!!!! Pretty please with a cherry, chocolate sauce and a banana on top write more as soon as you can!!!!!!!!!!! :)
  13. muppetfan24/7

    muppetfan24/7 Well-Known Member

    If there is no more story I will say like Floyd said, "Like a banana on an ice cream. I intend to split." That means that if this story dies, then I will quit reading this fanfic. Oh, you got to give us more.
    GopherCoffee likes this.
  14. floyd<3janice

    floyd<3janice Well-Known Member

    This is good please continue you can't let Kermit die NOOOO.

    Ok I'm calmed down now so you may now continue the story please!
    GopherCoffee likes this.
  15. muppetfan24/7

    muppetfan24/7 Well-Known Member

    Okay, I am calming down too.

    *pushing patience mode button*

    Now I will wait until there is another chapter.
    GopherCoffee likes this.
  16. Animal'sBunny

    Animal'sBunny Active Member

    Hmmmm, maybe I should get a patience mode button...
    GopherCoffee likes this.
  17. miss kermie

    miss kermie Well-Known Member

    I dunno... ChAPTER 3?

    Jaz and Fozzie crept upstairs, much like how Piggy did.
    As they crept past Kermit's room, they heard nothing. Of course, they thought nothing of it. They were totally unaware of Kermit's sleeping habits.
    As they approached Piggy's door, Jaz listened for any odd noise. Or any kind of noise at all really. "It's important to stay absolutely silent when trying to listen to Piggy."
    Fozzie nodded in confirmation. As Jaz pressed her head to Piggy's door, she heard light crying, that she knew would eventually turn into loud crys of destruction.
    Fozzie put his arms around Jaz hoping to get a better listen, and to get closer to his sweetheart. "Why is she crying?" Fozzie whispered.
    Jaz shrugged. For once, she knew nothing about her Mother figure.
    "I think that maybe we should investigate Kermit's room." Jaz whispered, already heading to her amphibious friend's room.
    By the time Fozzie caught up with her, he already saw that Kermit wasn't in bed, and Jaz was staring out the window.
    "I think I know why Piggy's crying..."
    Fozzie rushed over to the window and saw Kermit's corpse lying on the hard concrete sidewalk outside. Fozzie almost cryed much like a baby.
    Jaz began to hug Fozzie. "What are we supposed to tell the others?" Jaz asked.
    "I-I don't know... We don't even know what happened..."
    Jaz hugged him tighter.
    "Well... Tomorrow, we need to tell everyone... At breakfast... when Robin has already left for school... I don't want to tear him apart like that..."
    Fozzie nodded, quickly kissed her, and went to bed, as Jaz did the same.

    I wonder how that's going to go...
    LizAngie likes this.
  18. muppetfan24/7

    muppetfan24/7 Well-Known Member

    Wow Jaz! This is powerful! I bet Robin will be upset if something bad happened to his uncle. Whoa! More please!
    GopherCoffee likes this.
  19. Animal'sBunny

    Animal'sBunny Active Member

    :eek: (need I say more?)
    P.S: this is great, keep it coming!!!:) (I feel bad using that smiley on this thread...)
    GopherCoffee and miss kermie like this.
  20. floyd<3janice

    floyd<3janice Well-Known Member

    More more more more more more please more! This is very good I love it its so original and captivating more please
    GopherCoffee likes this.

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