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Ruahnna
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(The party is over. Ryan is rather grumpily cleaning up, muttering about "The Departed" and other unknown and unliked winners.)
With a profound feeling of relief, Catherine stands guard as Layla and her roomies traipse down the hall to their room. Once they are safely behind closed doors, Catherine gives a high sign to Kermit, who wonders a little nervously how he is going to conclude this very romantic night without finding himself engaged. He stands and pulls Piggy to her feet, smiling at the blush on her cheek. She takes his hand and follows him and Catherine and Fozzie back to their room.
Fozzie: Wow--for a moment there, I thought I was seeing things.
Catherine and Kermit exchange frantic glances.
Catherine: Oh, but--
Kermit: Um, Fozzie, don't you--
Fozzie: Yeah--first I thought I was seeing double. Then I thought I was really seeing double because the other Miss Piggy had on the same dress as you.
(Time stops, and two out of four figures freeze in terror, waiting for lightning to strike. After a moment or two, Catherine opens her eyes and looks at Piggy quizzically. Piggy rolls her eyes and gives an elaborate shrug.)
Piggy: It looked better on me.
(She sails past them into the room. Everyone else follows in her wake, Fozzie trailing last as he realizes his faux pas.)
Kermit: But--but, you knew? All along? You knew?
Catherine: We were afraid you'd be upset.
(Again, Piggy shrugged. There is something in the gesture that makes Catherine want to hug her roomie, but there is something else that warns her off. She looks at Piggy uncomfortably, but Piggy looks up and gives her room-mate a very direct look.)
Piggy: Moi will see you in a moment, when Moi comes back to the room.
Catherine: (nodding) Okay. (Reluctantly, she goes.)
Fozzie: Night everybody. (He walks slowly to his room, leaving Kermit and Piggy in the main living area.)
(They are very quiet for a moment or two.)
Kermit: So. You, um, knew then.
Piggy: Yes. (She won't look at him.)
Kermit: When did--? Um, how did you find out?
Piggy: (whispering) When you were acting so romantic, trying to keep my attention. I knew something had to be wrong, for you to be behaving so...well....
Kermit: (taking a step towards her) Oh, but I wasn't--um, I didn't just want to, um...Piggy?
(Piggy is looking away, and her voice is barely above a whisper.) Yes?
(Kermit steps forward, closing the distance between them. If he had reached for her hand, Piggy might have eluded him, but he reached out and put both arms tight around her.)
Kermit: I wasn't pretending to be romantic because someone else was wearing your dress.
Piggy: (looking up hopefully) You...you weren't?
Kermit: Huh uh. I was being romantic because nobody could ever look like you in that dress--even if they look exactly like you.
Piggy: But--
Kermit: And I'd have to be six kinds of a fool not to notice, and know, that I'm a lucky frog. (Gently, he leans in and kisses her. It's very nice.) There--who needs an Oscar--I've got a trophy pig!
(Piggy starts to shove him away, then leans in close, plants a very no-nonsense kiss on him, and then shoves him away. It isn't nice--it is mind-boggling, and Kermit staggers just a little.)
Piggy: Go on--off with vous.
Kermit: (groggily) Right....
(Kermit staggers happily to his room.)
(After he is gone, Piggy checks her reflection in the mirror just behind the door. She is, of course, satisfied with what she sees.)
Piggy: Coat check girl indeed!
(And Piggy takes herself to bed.)
With a profound feeling of relief, Catherine stands guard as Layla and her roomies traipse down the hall to their room. Once they are safely behind closed doors, Catherine gives a high sign to Kermit, who wonders a little nervously how he is going to conclude this very romantic night without finding himself engaged. He stands and pulls Piggy to her feet, smiling at the blush on her cheek. She takes his hand and follows him and Catherine and Fozzie back to their room.
Fozzie: Wow--for a moment there, I thought I was seeing things.
Catherine and Kermit exchange frantic glances.
Catherine: Oh, but--
Kermit: Um, Fozzie, don't you--
Fozzie: Yeah--first I thought I was seeing double. Then I thought I was really seeing double because the other Miss Piggy had on the same dress as you.
(Time stops, and two out of four figures freeze in terror, waiting for lightning to strike. After a moment or two, Catherine opens her eyes and looks at Piggy quizzically. Piggy rolls her eyes and gives an elaborate shrug.)
Piggy: It looked better on me.
(She sails past them into the room. Everyone else follows in her wake, Fozzie trailing last as he realizes his faux pas.)
Kermit: But--but, you knew? All along? You knew?
Catherine: We were afraid you'd be upset.
(Again, Piggy shrugged. There is something in the gesture that makes Catherine want to hug her roomie, but there is something else that warns her off. She looks at Piggy uncomfortably, but Piggy looks up and gives her room-mate a very direct look.)
Piggy: Moi will see you in a moment, when Moi comes back to the room.
Catherine: (nodding) Okay. (Reluctantly, she goes.)
Fozzie: Night everybody. (He walks slowly to his room, leaving Kermit and Piggy in the main living area.)
(They are very quiet for a moment or two.)
Kermit: So. You, um, knew then.
Piggy: Yes. (She won't look at him.)
Kermit: When did--? Um, how did you find out?
Piggy: (whispering) When you were acting so romantic, trying to keep my attention. I knew something had to be wrong, for you to be behaving so...well....
Kermit: (taking a step towards her) Oh, but I wasn't--um, I didn't just want to, um...Piggy?
(Piggy is looking away, and her voice is barely above a whisper.) Yes?
(Kermit steps forward, closing the distance between them. If he had reached for her hand, Piggy might have eluded him, but he reached out and put both arms tight around her.)
Kermit: I wasn't pretending to be romantic because someone else was wearing your dress.
Piggy: (looking up hopefully) You...you weren't?
Kermit: Huh uh. I was being romantic because nobody could ever look like you in that dress--even if they look exactly like you.
Piggy: But--
Kermit: And I'd have to be six kinds of a fool not to notice, and know, that I'm a lucky frog. (Gently, he leans in and kisses her. It's very nice.) There--who needs an Oscar--I've got a trophy pig!
(Piggy starts to shove him away, then leans in close, plants a very no-nonsense kiss on him, and then shoves him away. It isn't nice--it is mind-boggling, and Kermit staggers just a little.)
Piggy: Go on--off with vous.
Kermit: (groggily) Right....
(Kermit staggers happily to his room.)
(After he is gone, Piggy checks her reflection in the mirror just behind the door. She is, of course, satisfied with what she sees.)
Piggy: Coat check girl indeed!
(And Piggy takes herself to bed.)
