The New New Quote Thread

D'Snowth

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DAD: Dexter, what do you have to say for yourself!?
DEXTER: Well, aheh, I'm sorry I ruined Christmas, again, but, um, isn't Christmas really about, uh, family? And, uh, love? And sharing? And . . . (Sing-song) O Christmas tree, O Christmas tre--
DEE DEE: You blockhead! That's not what Christmas is about!
DEXTER: It's not? Then what is it about?
SANTA: The presents. Ho-ho-ho! (Wink)
 

mr3urious

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"If Mittens chose to save Baby Penguin based on his beliefs, and Mittens' beliefs are not in his direct control, does Mittens really have free will?"

- Maraka, from the dead-on SNL TV Funhouse parody of Dora the Explorer
 

D'Snowth

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DENTIST: Well, kids, we've all had fun here today, haven't we? But remember, dental hygene is very important. You should see your dentist at least once a year.
VAL HALEN: That's right. And, remember - dentists are your friends. And if you neglect your friends, you can be a major pain. Isn't that right, Major Glory?
MAJOR GLORY: (Having his teeth scraped) Ri-i-i-i-iiiiiight.
 

Drtooth

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"So...So Jesus was like a Zombie?

Like in 'The Walking Dead?'


I wish Chris Hardwick was here to giddily explain these confusing plot points."

_______Steve Smith
 

antsamthompson9

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Noel MacNeal says his son loves the 7 minute film on Sesame Street about cows: "The length of it being over 7 minutes, they would never do that today, because of the argument that kids have a short attention span. No, you are training kids to have a short attention span, because it's cheaper and more economical to do little pods of things that you can repackage and then sell off. Kids have the same attention span they always have. You're just teaching them it's better to have a shorter one."
 

D'Snowth

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That makes me think of that Sid & Marty Krofft parody where they talk about how back in their day, "we didn't have short attention spans like you kids do today. Back then, we could just sit . . . and stare at a candle, for like . . . three hours, man . . . and our minds would be blown!"
 

Mo Frackle

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Boo Boo: Gosh, Yogi! We're indecent!
Ranger Smith: Let's see what the Jellystone Handbook says about bare-naked bears. Here we go: Article 1, Section 3: "Forest animals must not go naked. Each beast must wear at least one item of human attire!"

- Boo Boo Runs Wild
 
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