A Nest Divided: A Sam the Eagle Story

newsmanfan

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Caught up again...

Rowlf's serious barside chat with Sam must have been difficult to get through, with Sam's knee-jerk interruptions and prejudices flying every which way. Kudos to the dog for trying to reach through that haze of anger.

Sam clearly doesn't listen to anyone including his former mate. Not sure he'll learn anything from a volunteer day at Hillary's school...and does this mean he'll sit in on a taxidermy session as well? Yeek.

I like this story a good bit. Even someone as one-dimensional as the stuffed eagle ought to be explored a little...just to see if he has another side. :smile: Please keep at it.

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charlietheowl

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Thanks buddy! Rowlf's been around so many people in his life that he knows how to take their pulse and say the right thing at the right time, and he's friendly enough that it's hard to get mad at him even if he says something that the other person doesn't want to hear. Sam doesn't always listen, but he's at least trying here to see what Hillary does, and then he's going to do something with Andrew. He only knows how to try and change slowly, if at all.
 

theSHE124

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July's almost over, so...when's the next chapter coming? :sleep: I wanna know what kinda shenanigan Gonzo is getting into!:concern:
 

charlietheowl

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Been a little bit, hasn't it?

Chapter 18
"So I stepped to the left! Then I moved back to the right! The defender couldn't tell which way I was going to go next! His eyes were scattering around like pinballs."​
"Bawk bawk brawk."​
"So I stared him down. I could sense the fear and trepidation in him, and knew I had to strike. Then, just then, I put the ball on the floor, and bounced it right between his legs. Boom!"​
"Brawk!"​
"Yes, Camilla, it was impressive indeed. The poor guy didn't know what to do, so I ran by him, grabbed the ball on the next bounce and took a layup. Swoosh! Another two points for me."​
Gonzo and Camilla were standing in the back parking lot of the Muppet Theater, which had more than just spaces for cars. There were a couple picnic tables for when the weather was good, and a basketball hoop for when there was downtime during filming. Gonzo enjoyed the basketball hoop quite a bit, as he loved playing Horse with anyone who would be willing to put up with his dangerous ideas for shots.​
"So the next shot, you have to shoot blindfolded, with your right hand, while perched on top of the fire hydrant next to Pepe's car. Okay?"
"Gonzo, I don't think I can even stand on the fire hydrant. My feet are bigger than yours."
"Come on, Fozzie! You can do it. I'll do it first, just watch me. Look, I'm standing on here fine."
"Gee, Gonzo, you're doing okay so far. Now for the shot."
"And for the scoop-oop-OOOOOOPS!'
"I guess you put a little too much scoop on the shot. I'm going to go get Kermit and Pepe. Looks like he'll need a new windshield."
"You still have to take the shot."
Just then, Gonzo's next competitor stepped out of the Theater, former NBA player and current commentator and commercial pitchman Charles Barkley.​
"Kermit, why are you making me go outside again? Don't tell me this is where my dressing room is."​
"Nope, I just thought you might want to check out our little basketball court."​
"Pretty nice. Looks like someone's on it though? Is that Gonzo?"​
"Yeah, he fancies himself quite the basketball player."​
As if he could tell Kermit and Charles were talking about him, Gonzo darted over to where they were standing.​
"Ah-ha! So if it isn't Gnarls Barkley!"​
"Seriously? That's not my name! That's the stupid band that did "Crazy". My name is Charles."​
"Okay, whatever. But I'm not here to make small talk, I'm here to challenge you to a game of Horse!"​
"Seriously? Horse? I'm four feet taller than you. I'll have such an advantage over you it's not even funny."​
"I doubt you've ever seen me shoot hoops before. I used to play a little bit in college."​
"You went to college?"​
"I took some classes at Southwest Kansas State Technical College Northwest Campus. I played a mean point guard."​
"Kermit, that cannot be a real college. That school probably has more words in its name than degrees they offered."​
Before Kermit could say anything, Gonzo piped up. "Don't believe me? I have my yearbook in the studio! I'll go get it!"​
Meanwhile, on the other side of the parking lot, a pick-up truck pulled into a parking space, turned off the ignition, and then turned it back on.​
"But Dad, the truck is fine, no one's around here."​
"Andrew, would you look at the white lines here? You're on the line on the right side. Back out and fix it."​
"Okay."​
Andrew pulled the truck out of the spot and then pulled in again, this time right down the center.​
"That's better."​
The two eagles made their way out of the pick-up truck and to the back of it. In the upcoming episode with Charles Barkley, Scooter hatched the idea of doing a number set on a basketball court, since Charles was such a good NBA player. So Scooter and Kermit and Charles bounced around some ideas, and once Charles gave the okay, Scooter and Walter set out to order the materials for the number; basketball hoops, basketballs, uniforms, cheerleading outfits, and what was in the back of the truck now, a bench for the players.​
"All right, better get this bench out of the truck, Dad. Do you think we can carry it ourselves or do you want me to get Beauregard?"​
"Beauregard! I don't want to get him involved! That lump nearly broke my cell phone a couple of weeks ago when he pushed a cart into me. He'd break this bench in an instant."​
"But he's really strong!"​
"We can do it ourselves. Now look, I have these weight belts here, put them on and we'll be okay."​
Sam pulled out two black wrap-around belts from the front of the truck, which looked like they had been sitting in storage since 1982, old and worn out, garish orange and blue striped.​
"Where did you get these?"​
"I got them when the crew team at UVA shut down and had a going-out-of-business sale in the fall of 1981. Four belts for six dollars, a good bargain. We don't want to strain our backs."​
While Sam and Andrew put on their belts and lifted the bench, Gonzo came back outside with his yearbook.​
"See! See! There I am! Look at me post that guard up! He didn't have a chance."​
"That guard is as big as an ant. Literally. You were driving to the hoop against an ant. What division did you play in, seven? eight?"​
"Division Six, excuse me. Now read this and see if you continue to doubt my game any more."​
"Gonzo Frackle, number 6 for the Southwest Kansas State Technical College Northwest Campus Great Auks, helped pushed the pace this year as the high-flying, court-diving, hand-jiving, defense-depriving point guard. His on-court leadership and off-court canasta games helped lead Coach Cadwallader's team to a 5 and 26 record in the Great Kansas Highlands conference. He is shown here taking playing against Frank McNally of the Kansas State Teachers College for Formicidae. "​
"See! I told you I was a real player! Now will you accept my challenge or not?"​
Charles sighed. "Well, I guess I don't really have anything more important to do. Let's go then. You choose first shot."​
Gonzo looked around the parking lot. "Let's see….um….hmmm….I wish that ferris wheel was still here from when Alec Baldwin was the guest star…would have made a good starting spot for a dunk…oooh! Let's use that bench over there! We'll just ask Sam and Andrew to hold it steady for us."​
"I'm not shooting off of some bench carried by a couple of blue jays-"​
Sam cut in. "Excuse me. EAGLES."​
"Come on, Charles, it's safe!" Gonzo jumped on the bench, nearly causing Andrew to lose his grip for a moment. He stood there, holding the basketball in his hand, contemplating the hoop as if he was at a buffet table and had room for only one dessert. "Hmm. What should I do here?"​
"Get down would be my first suggestion," huffed Sam.​
"I got it! So take your left hand and cover your right eye-"​
"Gonzo! Wrong hands!," shouted Kermit.​
"Okay, that's better. So put the hand over your eye, and then spin around in a circle three times, and then shoot a fadeaway underhanded shot."​
"Gonzo, you're crazy. No wonder why you never made it to the NBA with that shot selection."​
"Don't be scared! Once you see how it works when I shoot it you'll try it too. Come on, watch me."​
"Can we move here?" Sam stomped his foot in impatience.​
Gonzo took a deep breath, placed the basketball on the bench next to him, stretched his arms in front of him, picked up the ball, and gave a war cry.​
"Let's do this!"​
He covered his eye, spun around three times, and went to shoot. In an impressive whirr of orange and blue, the ball and whatever went airborne at the same time, ball moving forward and whatever falling backward. The ball ended up harmlessly rolling against the parking lot, coming to rest again the front tire of Sam's truck, and Gonzo ended up hanging by his nose from the space between the base and back rest of the bench.​
"Aw man! It didn't go in! Now it's your turn Charles. You just have to get the ball for me."​
"Kermit, please tell me we have some scripts to read through right now, please."​
"Gonzo, I don't think we have time for a game of horse right now. Maybe you can just slide off the bench and we'll go inside."​
Before Gonzo could respond, Sam shook his head.​
"Enough! We've been holding this bench for ten minutes while you flail about! My wings are aching. We need to go inside."​
Andrew nodded in assent, and the two started walking inside, carrying Gonzo along with them.​
"So I guess we'll have to finish up later Charles?"​
*****​
Coming up in Chapter 19: This time the basketball shenanigans are scripted and on-stage, and Sam gets some news from Matty.​
 
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