One Shots, Parodies, & Trailers!

Misskermie

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Oh wow...
Piggy's between a rock and a hard place, huh?
Listen to the wierdo, or wait for the frog...
 

WebMistressGina

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It's time, once again, for me to update this. Yes, I know I technically have a pending story here that hasn't been finished, but that's why I made this thread. Because ideas sometimes don't get the message that I'm busy and have work to do.

This gem of awesomeness is actually based on an episode of SeaLab 2021, which was an original cartoon in the 1960s before CN's Adult Swim got a hold of it and made it better. I seem to be the only one of my friends that finds this show hilarious. Sadly, no longer showing on AS, but I believe you can get the DVDs (only missing season 4 now!) from their website. Anyway, here's -


Title: Trapped in a Closet (and yes, this is a snark on the R. Kelly ridiculousness, I mean song)
Idea From: SeaLab 2021 season 1 ep "In The Closet"
Rating: PG


“There’s something I have to tell you. I can deny it no longer. I’m in love with you, Pepita.”

“Oh! Ju are so sweet and handsomes, but there is something I must tell ju, h’okay? I am not Pepita, the womans of ju dreams, h’okay? I am…her twin sister!”

“No!”

“Si! I have loves ju from a far, h’okay? And my love, my Guatemaleness quivers for ju and only ju!”

“What the heck are you three doing in here?”

A normal at Muppet Theatre was never a normal day. It was something you just got used to when working with the group and while they themselves were quite used to the strange and odd happening, what Scooter Grosse, stage manager and production assistant, walked in on really did top the list of things no one should ever walk in to.

The young assistant and manager had been working non-stop, first doing his normal duties for the show, but also turning his hand to that of screen writing. He had taken a few classes when he had been in college, but he had never had the time – nor the will – to actually put any of his ideas on paper. He and Kermit, the undisputed leader of the Muppets, had been discussing ideas for another movie and Scooter had gotten it into his head that he would very much like to supply the script for it.

But as what happened when he did too many things at once, Scooter found himself losing sleep, which meant he often lost focus. A quick nap he figured would do the trick and he needed to do was find a place that was close enough to the theater that would allow him to get the rest he needed.

And that’s how he found the three, as he stood in the doorway of a prop and supply closet; Gonzo the Great, Rizzo the Rat, and Pepe the King Prawn were all gathered together doing, what looked like, some sort of…theater. Scooter didn’t know and he actually didn’t want to find out.

“Scooter!” Gonzo exclaimed, jumping up from the chair he had been sitting. “Thank heavens you’re here! That door is broken; we’ve been trapped in here for three days!”

“The door’s not broken,” the page said, stepping fully into the room. He immediately closed the door, much to the protests of the three who were already inside. “It’s just tricky.” The red head then tried to open the door, several times, and failed.

“This door’s broken,” he announced after a time.

“Yes, I can see that,” the weirdo deadpanned. “Now you – probably being the only person could have gotten us out – are now stuck in here with me and the idiot twins.”

“Hey!” the rat protested. “That’s not very nice!”

“Reezo is right, h’okay?” Pepe added. “’specially after we put on all these shows for you.”

“Is that why he’s wearing a dress?” Scooter whispered to the weirdo.

“Don’t ask.”

“And ju know,” the shrimp continued. “Ju weren’t complaining for the first two days, h’okay? Dos dias, h’okay? Dos dias we performs for ju and this what we get, huh?”

“Okay, first of all,” Gonzo countered. “Those first two days were spent with me trying to calm you both down, hence my idea for something to take your minds off our situation. Secondly, the performances were good, however when you start bringing in contrived and overused plot lines, that’s when you’ve lost your originality. Like I couldn’t see that Rick was going to be fooled by Pepita’s twin sister. C’mon! Have some pride in your characters!”

Scooter looked at the three before turning and trying the door one more time.

“Don’t blame me!” Rizzo cried, indignantly. “I thought I was doing a pretty good job!”

“I didn’t believe ju really care for me,” Pepe retorted. “I didn’t feel as though there was love in jur eyes.”

“Yeah, well,” the rat countered. “Maybe that’s because you’re coming off a bit…oh how can I say this nicely…trashy.”

“Trashy!?” Pepe exclaimed. “Ju are calling me trashy, ju ju ju…hick!”

“Hick!?” Rizzo screamed. “I’ll have you know my character grew up in a loving, close knit community in farm country!”

“This is actually the highlight of the three days,” Gonzo murmured. “This is a daily occurrence. I only wish I had popcorn.”

Soon enough, Pepe and Rizzo were at it, swinging and in most cases, missing each other as their argument got heated and then physical. And, like clockwork, both swung at the exact same time and managed to clock each other, knocking both out.

“This is usually when I take a nap,” Gonzo said, once the two tiny combatants were out cold.

“Good idea,” Scooter nodded, before turning out the lights.


[hr]


“Come in here, I wanna show you something.”

“Is it a box?”

“It’s sorta like a box. Close the door.”

“Hey, darlin’. I thought we came in here for supplies.”

“Oh, Moi is sure you can supply with exactly what I’m looking for.”

“Hey!”

“Gonzo!?”

“Whoa! We have not discussed this!”

The darkened supply closet was suddenly bathed in light, illuminating the fact that two more occupants had joined the quartet that was already inside. “What’re you two doing in here?” Scooter asked, upon seeing the two new occupants.

“Why did you close the door!?” Gonzo exclaimed.

Kermit the Frog and Miss Piggy both stumbled for some sort of explanation as to why they would be in a supply closet and were rapidly failing to come up with a solution. “Well, well, uh…” the frog stuttered. “There is perfectly fine explanation to all of this, but…but…I just came down here for this -” Looking around frantically, Kermit grab the first colorful thing he saw, only realizing that it was a haphazardly discarded red sequined ball gown.

“So I’ll be going,” he concluded, mustering all the dignity he could in the face of being caught attempting to fool around with his girlfriend in a closet, plus pulling a ball gown that was most certainly not going to fit him, nor was it his color. Storming towards the door, he tried to open it.

“The door’s broken,” Gonzo huffed.

“This door’s broken,” Kermit replied, as though he couldn’t believe he was now trapped like the others.

“Really?” the daredevil asked, sarcastically. “Gosh, if only someone had mentioned that five seconds ago, you wouldn’t have wasted your breath telling us that.”

“Alright listen,” Piggy huffed. “Moi does not have time for these types of shenanigans, so…what happened to the rat and shrimp?”

Gonzo shrugged. “They…they were like that when I got here.” Pausing for a moment, he pointed at the red headed manager. “Scooter did it.”


More to come later!
 

The Count

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*In Abby voice: "There's something I don't quite understand."
If the closet door's broken/locked from the inside so the Muppets are "trapped" in the closet... Then where's the secret opening? You know, how do more and more Muppets keep getting into the closet in the first place?
Babs: "That's a plothole big enough to drive a mactruck through!"
Other than that, is funny okay, and we wants more okay. After ju finish the 5-balls first okay.
 

WebMistressGina

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*In Abby voice: "There's something I don't quite understand."
What's that, Pinky?

If the closet door's broken/locked from the inside so the Muppets are "trapped" in the closet... Then where's the secret opening? You know, how do more and more Muppets keep getting into the closet in the first place?
Muppets can come in, ie via the door on the outside. They just can't get out. You're a Get Smart fan; remember the self-locking door? Appeared in two episodes.

Babs: "That's a plothole big enough to drive a mactruck through!"
No, not really, if you stop to think that opening a door from the outside is easy. It's getting out that's the problem.

In the 2021 episode, the door is electronic, but same problem - it was easy to use the touch pad to get in, but the pad on the inside (the one to get out) was broken.

It's like the door in my office - closing it from the outside seems to make it close completely, however when I close it from the inside, it keeps opening for no apparent reason.
 

The Count

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Oh okay, I get it now. It's like the doors we used to have at the library wing for handicapped students at my university, a mat on the floor to make them automatically open. But when the electricity went out, they must have had some sort of extra way to keep them open permanently until the lights came back.

Never mind me then. *Returns to cleaning KG chapter of awesomeness.
 

WebMistressGina

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And here's the finish to our Trapped in a Closet parody!


“Thanks a lot, Gonzo!”

“Okay, listen,” Kermit interrupted, knowing a fight when he heard one. “Let’s not panic or anything.”

“Right,” Gonzo nodded. “Besides, Scooter’s here and he’s got a big brain…”

“Duh,” agreed Piggy.

“So?” the weirdo said, indicating the younger Muppet. “Get to it, Hoss.”

“Are you serious?” the page asked, incredulously. “I’m a manager, not a robot! And if you so much as think that you’re going to use me as some sort of handyman, fixer of doors…”

“I’ll up your pay by twenty bucks,” Kermit murmured.

“…then I’m going to need a screwdriver,” the Muppet finished. “Preferably a flat head.”

“Where are we going to find a screwdriver in a supply closet, MacGyver?” Piggy huffed.

Scooter glared at her. “I’m sure you have a nail file on your person there, Rambo,” he retorted. “Unless you have something more heavy duty that even the frog hasn’t found.”

“I’m about to lower that raise of yours,” the frog muttered.

With tensions reaching new heights, Rizzo thought it was a perfect time to emerge from his ‘nap’. Muttering to himself about uppity shrimp, the rat managed to get to his feet, surprised to see that Kermit and Piggy had joined their little group. It of course was nothing in comparison to the fact that he was now standing and Pepe wasn’t.

“Yeah!” he warbled. “That’s right, punk! Mama didn’t raise no fool. Fool!” Looking around, he nodded to the new arrivals. “Guys, Princess. Nice of you all to join us in our supply closet of doom.”

“No worries, Rizzo buddy,” Gonzo replied. “Scooter’s gonna get us out.”

“How?”

Pointing a thumb at Piggy, the stuntman said, “Pigbo here keeps a pretty handy switchblade of awesome somewhere on her person that I am most interested to discover.” Leaning over, Gonzo tried to get a peek, only to be halted by a fist in his side, bringing him to his knees on the floor. “Oh heavens! Kidneys!”

“Oh, stop complaining,” Piggy said, rolling her eyes. “You only need one.”

“Do you all mind?” the manager sneered, turning away from the door slightly. “Trying to do work here.”

“Oh!” Rizzo exclaimed, putting a hand to his heart. “Are we disturbing you? Oh, good heavens! Oh my stars! We mustn’t stop the very important work you must be doing right now! Everyone, please! Stop what you’re doing! Stop the presses! Stop the masses! Stop your breathing! The great master and boss, Lord Scooter, is about to…”

“Do you want this door opened or not?”

“I do.”

“Well, okay then!”

Pepe, who had been knocked cold earlier, managed to stumble his feet right as Scooter was loosening the last screw to the door knob. “What is going on heres?” he asked, confused. Shaking the cobwebs from his little head, Pepe watched as the stage manager was able to undo the inner door knob, allowing the door to open and granting their freedom.

Only, they weren’t exactly free.

As soon as Scooter opened the door, a pack of wild dogs was seemingly waiting outside. “Shut it, Scooter! Shut it!” Shutting it quickly, both Scooter and Kermit stood with their backs to the door, hoping to block the dogs from entering.

“Oh,” Pepe replied, eyes lighting up in remembrance. “Now I remember!”

“Remember what?” Gonzo hissed.

“Ju see,” the shrimp began. “I decided to do a good deed, si? So I rescued these nice dogs from the pounds.”

“Those didn’t look like cute little poodles to me!” Rizzo exclaimed.

“No, no,” Pepe replied, shaking his head. “The poodles, they goes fer El Pepe! No, those are the dogs from Mexico that I rescused, cause ju know, womens likes it when you rescue things.”

“We’re going to die in here!” the rat cried.

“No,” Piggy hissed. “First we’re going to have a shrimp barbeque, then we’re going to die in here.”

“Si, si,” the prawn nodded. “Except for that bbqs thing and the fact that yo soy King Prawn, h’okay!? But ju are probably right, we will probably die in here, but mira, could be worse h’okay?”

“How!?”

“How could this be any freaking worse!?”

“Mira,” the prawn said. “We could be out theres, h’okay? Like the Beakie surgeon man.”

The group looked at each other. While the theater could be a hustle and bustle of activity, there were days when only a handful of people were around; this day, as well as the previous days for the original trio that had been stuck. If Pepe was right, Dr. Honeydew and Beaker were in the theater or had been in the theater, meaning that poor Beaker was now probably running from both his lab partner and the dogs.

“You know, it’s not so bad in here,” Scooter commented. “If you put some flowers or plants around…”

“Soooo,” Gonzo began, leaning over to Piggy. “What was that thing that you and Kermit hadn’t discussed that involved little ole me?”

“Nothing.”

“Oh, c’mon! Are you sure it wasn’t something?”

“No.”

“Mira, everyone, mira,” Pepe started. “Reezo and I were doing something when Scooter came in, h’okay?” Turning to the rat, he said, “Let’s start when you discover that I am actually my twin sister, h’okay?”

“Sure,” Rizzo nodded. “What’s her name? I mean, you know, your new name?”

“Es Lupe, h’okay?”

“H’okay.”

“Is that why he’s wearing a dress?” Piggy whispered.

“It’s really better if you don’t ask,” Gonzo replied. “Frankly, it made more sense when they were doing the Spanish version of this; quite surprised that Rizzo speaks Spanish. Did you know that?”

“I don’t really care.”
 

newsmanfan

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Ah. Some good old random absurdist shtick. Wild dogs ate my baby! Very cute. Sometimes ya just gotta go with stuff that makes zero sense, or it wouldn't be the Muppets...

*throwing random trout into the mix* Wuh-huh-huh!
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WebMistressGina

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Sup folks! Firstly, I've been meaning to do this, but big ups to Mr. Count Moderator Guy for putting this on the big ole list of finished fics! I've been meaning to say thanks, so thanks.

Okay, so proving that not having a job is obviously boring to death, today during nap time, I came up with this idea. So this is an idea, but I wanted to know what everyone thought and perhaps that would be the next story after, you know, I finish the two that I'm working on.

Here's the idea - in a time travel twist, the Muppets must stop one of their former villains (or new villain, haven't really gotten that far yet) from taking revenge. How, you ask?

What do you mean you wouldn't ask that? Well, ask it now!

How, Gina?

By ensuring that the Muppets never meet!

So here's a bit of an outline okay?

The start of the story is typical Muppet Show fashion, when the villain enters and basically has a bone to pick with Kermit. I'm thinking it has to be a past villain or a new villain with ties to a past villain. My immediate thought was the child of Dr. Hopper, so I went with that for a while. The villain then goes back to his lair and wonders if there's a way to break up the Muppets, wishing they had never met in the first place.

That gives him an idea. Dun dun DUNNNNNNNNN!

So this little idea looks to be a bit throwback to The Muppet Movie, with some of Meeting at Schotky's and some 5 Ball Cha-Cha and The Muppets 2011 thrown in for good measure. Now for your guys' input. I pretty much have a story here apparently, but I don't have a villain.

As mentioned, the original idea was that of a child of Doc Hopper, but as I was writing, an idea pushed the idea that maybe it could be Tex Richman, but I kinda don't want to do that. So the question is - old villain or new villain?

Also, as this is a time travelly piece, how exactly does our villain get a time travel device?

Oh wait! IDEA! Nevermind, that last one, but as to how this thing would work could be helpful, so sciency-fictiony peeps feel free to reply cause I probably am not gonna be able to do this without some help.

SO....what do you think?
 
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