The Secret Life of a Background Character

[galagr]

Are you gonna have Beautiful Day Monster in the stories?

 

[Hubert]

Beautiful Day will make an appearance in one way or another, but he won't be having a major role.

 

[Mo Frackle]

Already loving this story!

 

[Hubert]

I'm really glad you are...the actual good chapters, where it turns from just history to the actual stories, will be on their way soon.

 

[Hubert]

Sorry for the long delays. I'll try to get them out more frequently...course, that's what I said last time.

Chapter 3.1: Rowlf the Dog

“The magician sketches sound fun.”

Worst. Decision. I. Ever. Made. In. My. Life.

Let me back up here, and put this all in context for you. Kermit had informed me that they needed help on the “MuppeTelevision” crew. Basically, the crew streamed videos from all over the world, then chose the ones they thought the audience would most want to see. Kinda like the Muppet Show, but not. We all got a letter from Kermit about this opportunity, and we were to report to “Muppet Central,” as the control room was called, to talk to Kermit about what we would be doing on the show. So one morning I went in to talk to the little green guy.

“Hey Rowlf,” Kermit said.
“Hey. I’m here to talk to you about my role in the MuppeTelevision crew. I was hoping that you might need a piano player or something?”
“Possibly. But we also have these great sketches we need someone to be in, Merlin the Magician, M.D. It’s going to be a lot like Veterinarian’s Hospital, with puns and stuff, so I thought maybe you’d consider doing that. Course, it’s your choice.”
“Would it be possible for me to do both?” I asked.
“Maybe,” Kermit replied, “it would require a lot of extra workload.”
“I can handle it,” I said. I wanted to do them both very badly. After all, it didn’t seem to me like either require that much effort. I think I did more on the Muppet Show.
At that moment, the doors opened. In came a purple guy with red dreadlocks, holding a guitar, a guy with an orange beard, who beared a striking resemblance to Zeke from the jugband, holding a guitar, a guy with brown hair, mumbling something and holding a saxophone and long-haired girl with drumsticks.
“Hey, are you Mr. The Frog?” the purple one said. “We’re the band Digit put together?”
“Oh, good. Come over here guys, and you can set up your instruments.”
It was then I realized that the whole time, Kermit knew that a piano player wouldn’t be necessary. He just didn’t want to straight up tell me that. That’s Kermit for you.
“Y’know, the magician sketches sound fun,” I said. “I’ll just do them.”
“Oh, good. Let me go get the scripts,” said Kermit.

I was still excited. These sketches really did sound fun, even if I couldn’t play the piano. I wanted something like Veterinarian’s Hospital to do again. I had so much fun with that, just carefree puns. This whole MuppeTelevision concept sounded like a lot of fun. I couldn’t wait to get started. Little did I know what was on the horizon. Little did I know that that day changed my life. Little did I know that that sentence would put me out of solid work for over 20 years.

“The magician sketches sound fun.”

It still haunts me to this day.

 

[Twisted Tails]

Sorry for the long delays. I'll try to get them out more frequently...course, that's what I said last time.

Chapter 3.1: Rowlf the Dog

“The magician sketches sound fun.”

Worst. Decision. I. Ever. Made. In. My. Life.

Let me back up here, and put this all in context for you. Kermit had informed me that they needed help on the “MuppeTelevision” crew. Basically, the crew streamed videos from all over the world, then chose the ones they thought the audience would most want to see. Kinda like the Muppet Show, but not. We all got a letter from Kermit about this opportunity, and we were to report to “Muppet Central,” as the control room was called, to talk to Kermit about what we would be doing on the show. So one morning I went in to talk to the little green guy.

“Hey Rowlf,” Kermit said.
“Hey. I’m here to talk to you about my role in the MuppeTelevision crew. I was hoping that you might need a piano player or something?”
“Possibly. But we also have these great sketches we need someone to be in, Merlin the Magician, M.D. It’s going to be a lot like Veterinarian’s Hospital, with puns and stuff, so I thought maybe you’d consider doing that. Course, it’s your choice.”
“Would it be possible for me to do both?” I asked.
“Maybe,” Kermit replied, “it would require a lot of extra workload.”
“I can handle it,” I said. I wanted to do them both very badly. After all, it didn’t seem to me like either require that much effort. I think I did more on the Muppet Show.
At that moment, the doors opened. In came a purple guy with red dreadlocks, holding a guitar, a guy with an orange beard, who beared a striking resemblance to Zeke from the jugband, holding a guitar, a guy with brown hair, mumbling something and holding a saxophone and long-haired girl with drumsticks.
“Hey, are you Mr. The Frog?” the purple one said. “We’re the band Digit put together?”
“Oh, good. Come over here guys, and you can set up your instruments.”
It was then I realized that the whole time, Kermit knew that a piano player wouldn’t be necessary. He just didn’t want to straight up tell me that. That’s Kermit for you.
“Y’know, the magician sketches sound fun,” I said. “I’ll just do them.”
“Oh, good. Let me go get the scripts,” said Kermit.

I was still excited. These sketches really did sound fun, even if I couldn’t play the piano. I wanted something like Veterinarian’s Hospital to do again. I had so much fun with that, just carefree puns. This whole MuppeTelevision concept sounded like a lot of fun. I couldn’t wait to get started. Little did I know what was on the horizon. Little did I know that that day changed my life. Little did I know that that sentence would put me out of solid work for over 20 years.

“The magician sketches sound fun.”

It still haunts me to this day.

Awwwww! The poor thing! Rowlf needs a hug!

 

[Hubert]

Chapter 3.2: Link Hogthrob

On a beautiful spring morning, I went out to my mailbox for the next issue of Heartthrob Monthly. Instead I found a letter. I took it in, and found this:

Dear Link Hogthrob,

I would like to give you the opportunity to work on MuppeTelevision, a TV station that I am in charge of running. We are able to pick up signals from all over the world, and will be choosing the best ones to air on our station. We are hoping that you will consider taking this wonderful opportunity to learn more about the mechanics behind television, performing, all the while having a lot of fun.

If you are interested, all you have to do is come to Muppet Central, the control room of MuppeTelevision, and I will talk to you about what role is best for you on the show. We are still looking for many performers, assistants, musicians, and a wide variety of others. Please also note that we have sent out some notices to the general public regarding jobs here, so there may be other new crew members hired to fill in roles of the show. However, I remain confident that we will be able to find some sort of job for each and every person that is interested. This is a wonderful opportunity to learn and grow in the television industry, and I have the hope that many people will grasp that opportunity.

Yours truly,

Kermit the Frog

At that point I knew that Kermit needed me, or the entire station would suffer terribly. So I ran down to Muppet Central as fast as I could. I busted down the door, ran in, and in a booming voice I said, “Anyone here?” No answer. “Anyone?” Suddenly I heard music coming from another part of the building. I walked down and opened up the door. I saw the Electric Mayhem there, playing a terrible sounding song. They stopped.

“That is it,” Floyd said. “I’m outta here. These songs are terrible, these instruments are junk, I’m done with this gig.”
“Yeah, like rully.”
Floyd continued. “I mean, I could write better music than this trash.”
“Right, except if he didn’t know he was a genius, he wouldn’t even listen to the trash he wrote,” Dr. Teeth joked to Zoot.
Floyd and Janice walked out, practically knocking me over in the process
“Hey Link, when’d you get here?” Dr. Teeth asked.
“Mm...maybe a few minutes ago.”
“You play an instrument?”
“Well, I did play some trumpet for a while.”
“Wanna join in on this song? We could use any help we can get, with them two gone.”
“Sure.” I picked up a trumpet lying across the room. Dr. Teeth handed me a sheet with some strange, foreign symbols on them.
“What’s this?” I asked, confused.
“That’s the song we’re playing.”
“Oh yeah, right.” I was beginning to wonder if they were listening to too much music. No wonder Floyd and Janice quit. They began playing the song. I had no idea what was going on. I just sort of blurted out a few notes. They stopped.
“Link, what are you doing?” Dr. Teeth asked.
“Um, playing the song?” I said. Dr. Teeth came over to me. Look, we started playing this part here. You don’t come in yet, because there’s no notes there for you. You come in down here.
“Ah. Okay,” I said, still lost. Dr. Teeth walked back to his position behind the keyboard. They began playing again. It was harder than it looked. How was I to know when they finished the first part? So I just started playing when the time seemed right. They stopped again.
“Link!” Dr. Teeth came down again. Look, in this particular song, there are four beats in every one of these sections. So you keep counting. 1, 2, 3, 4, 1, 2, 3, 4. Then when you count down to here, you start playing. Got that?”
“Yeah.” He went back up. They started playing. I counted, “1, 2, 3, 4, 1, 2, 3, 4, 1-” They stopped.
“You don’t count out loud!”
“Oh. Sorry.” They began playing again. I counted, 1, 2, 3, 4, 1, 2, 3, 4, 1, 2, 3, 4, 1, 2, 3, 4. Then it was my time to play. I began. They stopped, leaving me to do a brilliant trumpet solo. Dr. Teeth came down again.
“These are notes. These particular ones you play are one beat. So you’ll play for one beat, then stop, then play again for one beat.”
“Wouldn’t it make more sense to get it all over with at once?”
“It doesn’t work that way. Now you’ll count here the same way you do up there, except on each number you count, you play during that number. These notes are on different lines. The line notes are E, G, B, D, and F. The space notes are F, A, C, and E. You can remember then by saying, Every Good Boy Does Fine, and the world “face.””
Zoot cut in. “Wha? I thought it was Esther Gives Boyd Dark Fish?”
“Whatever,” Dr. Teeth said. “As long as you remember the notes.”
“I think I got it this time,” I said. They began playing. I counted, 1, 2, 3, 4, 1, 2, 3, 4, 1, 2, 3, 4, 1, 2, 3, 4. I started playing each note, like they said. They stopped.
“What’s the problem?” I asked. You’re playing the G note every single time. You’re supposed to play B first, then F, then-”
“How do I do that?” I interrupted. As I was thrown out of the room, I landed right on top of Kermit.
“Oh, Kermit! You’re just the frog I wanted to see!” I said.
“Hey Link, what do you need.”
“I got your letter, I was wondering what I could do.:
“Hmm...some of the band members quit. Maybe you could fill in for one of them?” A loud “NO!” echoed from the band room.
“Or not. Tell you what Link, just be here and I’ll give you some sort of job in the control room.”
“Sounds great Kermit, thanks!”

 

[Twisted Tails]

Chapter 3.2: Link Hogthrob

On a beautiful spring morning, I went out to my mailbox for the next issue of Heartthrob Monthly. Instead I found a letter. I took it in, and found this:

Dear Link Hogthrob,

I would like to give you the opportunity to work on MuppeTelevision, a TV station that I am in charge of running. We are able to pick up signals from all over the world, and will be choosing the best ones to air on our station. We are hoping that you will consider taking this wonderful opportunity to learn more about the mechanics behind television, performing, all the while having a lot of fun.

If you are interested, all you have to do is come to Muppet Central, the control room of MuppeTelevision, and I will talk to you about what role is best for you on the show. We are still looking for many performers, assistants, musicians, and a wide variety of others. Please also note that we have sent out some notices to the general public regarding jobs here, so there may be other new crew members hired to fill in roles of the show. However, I remain confident that we will be able to find some sort of job for each and every person that is interested. This is a wonderful opportunity to learn and grow in the television industry, and I have the hope that many people will grasp that opportunity.

Yours truly,

Kermit the Frog

At that point I knew that Kermit needed me, or the entire station would suffer terribly. So I ran down to Muppet Central as fast as I could. I busted down the door, ran in, and in a booming voice I said, “Anyone here?” No answer. “Anyone?” Suddenly I heard music coming from another part of the building. I walked down and opened up the door. I saw the Electric Mayhem there, playing a terrible sounding song. They stopped.

“That is it,” Floyd said. “I’m outta here. These songs are terrible, these instruments are junk, I’m done with this gig.”
“Yeah, like rully.”
Floyd continued. “I mean, I could write better music than this trash.”
“Right, except if he didn’t know he was a genius, he wouldn’t even listen to the trash he wrote,” Dr. Teeth joked to Zoot.
Floyd and Janice walked out, practically knocking me over in the process
“Hey Link, when’d you get here?” Dr. Teeth asked.
“Mm...maybe a few minutes ago.”
“You play an instrument?”
“Well, I did play some trumpet for a while.”
“Wanna join in on this song? We could use any help we can get, with them two gone.”
“Sure.” I picked up a trumpet lying across the room. Dr. Teeth handed me a sheet with some strange, foreign symbols on them.
“What’s this?” I asked, confused.
“That’s the song we’re playing.”
“Oh yeah, right.” I was beginning to wonder if they were listening to too much music. No wonder Floyd and Janice quit. They began playing the song. I had no idea what was going on. I just sort of blurted out a few notes. They stopped.
“Link, what are you doing?” Dr. Teeth asked.
“Um, playing the song?” I said. Dr. Teeth came over to me. Look, we started playing this part here. You don’t come in yet, because there’s no notes there for you. You come in down here.
“Ah. Okay,” I said, still lost. Dr. Teeth walked back to his position behind the keyboard. They began playing again. It was harder than it looked. How was I to know when they finished the first part? So I just started playing when the time seemed right. They stopped again.
“Link!” Dr. Teeth came down again. Look, in this particular song, there are four beats in every one of these sections. So you keep counting. 1, 2, 3, 4, 1, 2, 3, 4. Then when you count down to here, you start playing. Got that?”
“Yeah.” He went back up. They started playing. I counted, “1, 2, 3, 4, 1, 2, 3, 4, 1-” They stopped.
“You don’t count out loud!”
“Oh. Sorry.” They began playing again. I counted, 1, 2, 3, 4, 1, 2, 3, 4, 1, 2, 3, 4, 1, 2, 3, 4. Then it was my time to play. I began. They stopped, leaving me to do a brilliant trumpet solo. Dr. Teeth came down again.
“These are notes. These particular ones you play are one beat. So you’ll play for one beat, then stop, then play again for one beat.”
“Wouldn’t it make more sense to get it all over with at once?”
“It doesn’t work that way. Now you’ll count here the same way you do up there, except on each number you count, you play during that number. These notes are on different lines. The line notes are E, G, B, D, and F. The space notes are F, A, C, and E. You can remember then by saying, Every Good Boy Does Fine, and the world “face.””
Zoot cut in. “Wha? I thought it was Esther Gives Boyd Dark Fish?”
“Whatever,” Dr. Teeth said. “As long as you remember the notes.”
“I think I got it this time,” I said. They began playing. I counted, 1, 2, 3, 4, 1, 2, 3, 4, 1, 2, 3, 4, 1, 2, 3, 4. I started playing each note, like they said. They stopped.
“What’s the problem?” I asked. You’re playing the G note every single time. You’re supposed to play B first, then F, then-”
“How do I do that?” I interrupted. As I was thrown out of the room, I landed right on top of Kermit.
“Oh, Kermit! You’re just the frog I wanted to see!” I said.
“Hey Link, what do you need.”
“I got your letter, I was wondering what I could do.:
“Hmm...some of the band members quit. Maybe you could fill in for one of them?” A loud “NO!” echoed from the band room.
“Or not. Tell you what Link, just be here and I’ll give you some sort of job in the control room.”
“Sounds great Kermit, thanks!”

Hubert! You write so beautifully! I can hear Link's voice very clearly and I know Steve Whitmire does the dumb voice of the pig now. Kermit and Link both played by Steve? Holy Mokey! Interesting!

BTW: Great job! More please!

 

[Hubert]

Hubert! You write so beautifully! I can hear Link's voice very clearly and I know Steve Whitmire does the dumb voice of the pig now. Kermit and Link both played by Steve? Holy Mokey! Interesting!

BTW: Great job! More please!

Thanks so much! Glad you're enjoying the story. Hopefully I'll get some more up soon.

Something interesting I also found: I'm having a lot of Jim characters interact with each other in this, something that rarely happens in Muppet productions. Kermit and Rowlf, Kermit and Link, Link and Dr. Teeth...

 

[Twisted Tails]

Thanks so much! Glad you're enjoying the story. Hopefully I'll get some more up soon.

Something interesting I also found: I'm having a lot of Jim characters interact with each other in this, something that rarely happens in Muppet productions. Kermit and Rowlf, Kermit and Link, Link and Dr. Teeth...

Like I said, Kermit, Rowlf, Link, and Dr. Teeth were all puppeteered and voiced by Jim Henson.

Steve Whitmitre can do Kermit the Frog and Link, because he felt like Jim was like his close friend to him. He can't do Rowlf or Dr. Teeth. So, Bill Baretta does Rowlf the Dog and Dr. Teeth. Bill didn't know that he and Jim can do the rough voices of those guys in character (laughs)!

So, Steve and Bill are still around today!